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Topic: Boxer, inventor, scary head in a garbage can! (Read 6368 times)
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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Okay, so back in the early nineties Razor Ruddock was a heavyweight contender best known for going the distance with Tyson. A decent fighter who was never able to beat the really elite guys like Tyson or Lennox Lewis, he eventually retired after winning the Canadian heavyweight championship. If nothing else, at least he had the sense to go out on a winning streak with his health intact. After that he just sort of faded into obscurity. Until now.Something about this just strikes me as deeply funny. I mean, go look at his website. Look at the box in the upper left corner where he proclaims himself a "fighter-inventor". Look at the fucking pictures of him in a lab coat. Apparently building a trash can with a lever in it to crush garbage is serious motherfucking science.
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"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild "Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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OK, first off, that is hilarious, especially where his head is in the trash can. Second, did you also doubt the George Foreman Grill? I have been waiting for someone to invent a device to knock the shit out of my garbage. It's a gold mine, unless Mike Tyson comes along and invents a better garbage control device. That would be even funnier. And Don King would end up taking all the profits.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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The head in the trashcan is Absolut Awesome (TM).
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Oban
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4662
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Mike Tyson ear muffs.
"Guaranteed never to let go"
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Palin 2012 : Let's go out with a bang!
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Righ
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6542
Teaching the world Google-fu one broken dream at a time.
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Motherfucking forum Youtube overlay bullshit.
Are we sure that's not an SNL video?
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The camera adds a thousand barrels. - Steven Colbert
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657
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Motherfucking forum Youtube overlay bullshit.
You don't like it?
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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This is way more fun than the Foreman grill. That grill was just something some company produced and decided to get a celebrity endorsement for. But this thing? This is an actual case of a retired boxer deciding that the world needs a hand-powered trash squasher, and filming himself buried up to his neck in garbage in an effort to prove it. In all seriousness though, I have to say I'm pleased to see the guy is doing okay. A lot of these boxers just don't know when to give it up. Holyfield has another fight coming up at age 44, and he's probably going to get his skull crushed in Moscow by this Russian guy Ibragimov. Holyfield isn't broke, either. He made something like $150 million in his career, and I haven't heard anything about him blowing it all. He just can't give up the life. Ruddock was never half as successful as Holyfield, but at least he went out on a high note and then found something else to do with his middle age besides letting men young enough to be his son punch him in the head. Anyway, speaking of boxers and comedy, Larry Holmes is pretty fucking funny even though he doesn't mean to be. First, the infamous video of him leaping off the roof of a car into a pile of cops trying to drop-kick Trevor Berbick back in the day. Then the completely random re-enactment of the event I found while looking for the above video. And an Eddie Murphy performance of Raw other than the one that was made into a movie, with Tyson in the audience and Murphy doing his (surprisingly good) Holmes impression. "Mah name i' Lerrah Homes, ah lahk sewp!" Oh, and a Cracked pitch for the Larry Holmes Grillmaster X-L.
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"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild "Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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Oh, and a Cracked pitch for the Larry Holmes Grillmaster X-L. Le art.
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stu
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1891
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I was flipping through the channels and saw Holyfield box a wrestler on WWE a couple weeks ago. I think that was right after Vince McMahon told the crowd Steve Austin might be his son. Sad.
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Dear Diary, Jackpot!
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Big Gulp
Terracotta Army
Posts: 3275
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I think that was right after Vince McMahon told the crowd Steve Austin might be his son. Sad.
No way did Vince McMahon father Lee Majors. I don't even see him being old enough to have fathered the bionic woman, let alone the six million dollar man.
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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I believe he's referencing 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin. He's a good man to have if you're in need of a Guinness.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Bunk
Contributor
Posts: 5828
Operating Thetan One
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Just to make all of your days even worse, I'll fill you in on the end of that storyline - McMahon fathered a leprechaun.
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"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL "I have retard strength." - Schild
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stu
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1891
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Dear Diary, Jackpot!
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stu
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1891
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I think that was right after Vince McMahon told the crowd Steve Austin might be his son. Sad.
No way did Vince McMahon father Lee Majors. I don't even see him being old enough to have fathered the bionic woman, let alone the six million dollar man. lol. "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. My bad.
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Dear Diary, Jackpot!
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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WHAT...
THE...
FUCK?
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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He told me to burn some things. Be back later.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Phildo
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Can someone please hack into the employee login? I'm dying to know what kind of privileged info they get!
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