f13.net

I'm attempting to create one of the most useless and mystifying threads in the History of f13.

As many of you know, in about 3 weeks my wife is going to expel a money sink from her body.  Should this money sink manifest female, we have no problems.

Should it turn out to be a boy, we're royally screwed.

Why ?  We have fought for about a year now over names.  We cannot decide on a boys name, nor agree with each other on what a good name is.

So, Wire In.  Go ahead and tell me what your children or family are called.  Give me names galore.  Geek names, silly names, normal names, posh names, common names, DNS names.  Go for your life.

2 Provisos :

1 - I live in Scotland.  One of our top favourites for Girls Names is Dana.  Then some bright spark at my work pointed out that they call me Mr P - due to my second name.  This would make the child Dana P.   *Pause*  Think only Righ got that one.  Think about how your name sounds, therefore, in a Scottish Accent.

2 - My Family name is NOT McLennan nor Campbell nor Lennon nor McTavish.  It's Pieroni.  (Don't Ask.  A Huge amount of Italians fled to Scotland during the war.  You don't wanna know.)  Therefore, any name will need to somehow work with an Italian second name.


Go ahead with your suggestions and if you can think of a name that we will use, then you'll win something.  Probably a free babysitting session.

Please do NOT chime in if you're emotionally attached to the name.  I may return to the thread to comment on how fucking stupid your name is and do not want to hear that you were offended.  :)


Anyone suggesting a baby-book of names or googling internet baby names will also be beaten.  Don't think I'm not fucking desperate.  I'm posting HERE.

Dante
Damien

And of course

Seven

Names in my family:

Ryan, Jason, Douglass, Patrick, Brodie, Jack, Max, Verne, Elwood, Rob, Robert, Jeremy, Chris, Tom, Timothy (Tim)

Of course our last names are all of English origin, so I don't know that any of those work well with such an Italian name.  Well, maybe Rob or Robert.  Lots of the Italian-lineage kids I went to school with were named Robert, and just chose which derivation they wanted to use.

There was also a few Justins, a Brian and a Paul. (Though giving your kid the initials PP would just be evil.)

D'Artagnon for a boy. I'd name a girl Guinevere.

"OI, DARTAGNON, YER TEAS OOOT !"


I think not.

Bear in mind also that Dogtanian and the 3 Muskahounds were required viewing for any Scottish Child of a certain age.

One of our girls were supposed to be an Oscar - ruined it by being girls of course.

I've never met a Scot, that could pronounce my first name properly, so call him Hans and enjoy.

Huh... Had a fraternity brother with the same last name as you. His name was Rob, his sister was Lana.

Have you considered going with a more traditional Italian name? Antony (Tony), Allessandro (Alex), Carmen (wife's grandfather's name but kind of old school now), Vincente (Vince - my grandfather & uncle's name), Marco (Mark), Matthew (Matteo if you want more Italian).

Guy names from both sides of the immediate family:  James, Jacob ("Jake"), Jonathan, Alan ("Shithead"), Casey, Cameron, Cassidy, Derek.

Not much there to work with :P

My son's name is Dakota.  His middle name is Jaedon, which is a combination of his two living great grandfathers, James and Lindon.  Not really sure how that helps, but he turns six in a few weeks and so far his name has been a boon.  His two best friends are Logan and Jackson.

Your in for a very interesting couple of months.  Best of luck to you and your lady, and of course the little bit.

I misread the thread title as "Sponsor S Child."   :evil:

Since you're of Italian descent, call him Anthony. It's almost a surefire bet that there's at least 3-7 Anthony's down your lineage somewhere, so you'd be naming him after some kind of a relative.

Or you could just call him Haemish, just to fuck with the lads he'll go to early forms with. Woody to fit with your Internet persona.

Fuck it, just call him Zod. You'll be kneeling before his drowning wail soon anyway.

scot/irish family (even lived in Edinburgh as a kid and Skye), my family's names: Gavin, Mairi-Linday, Camilla, Michael, Ranald, Adam, Christopher, Sam, Diane, Martin, Collette

suggestions from yr surname: Evan, Gia, Liam, David, Kelly

good luck with the late night feedings

I suggest Dana. Hey why not?

It's a silly name for a bloke, that's why.

Name him Jack.  Nearly every bloke in Scotland is named Jack.  He'll fit right in.  The ones who are not named Jack are named Lewis.  We don't like them wot named Lewis, though.  So Jack it is, then.

Well, Craig is a nice name, or Michael for a son.  Either would sound fine with your last name I'd think.

For a daughter, I'm partial to Kayleigh Elaine, only because that is what I was going to use if I had a daughter.  Since my husband and I went the no kids route, I have no particular attachment other than "This is what I would have named a daughter.." one.  Or Allegria if you want to be different and somewhat more Italian sounding.  I just like the name really.

Good luck and congrats on the new bébé.

Jack, Andrew, Ben, Mitchell, Paul, David, Stephen, Christopher, Martin, Edward, Hugh and Bill are ALL TAKEN.

I have a large family.


We're fairly sure a female is going to be Dana Marie Pieroni.  And, if not, we have other ideas.  Girls names are easy in a male dominated family.

I like Owen as a boy's name.

Hugh is fun because he can be Shug.  I love that.  My nephew is Shug. 

What are you?  Some sort of Eyetie Scot?  Like Dario Franchetti?  Name him Dario.

Owen is too Welsh.  Go Euan or something. 

Or just name your own bloody sprog you lazy git.

Bruce, then.

After Batman.

I like Bruce!  Is it decided now?  Bruce Pepperoni!

Xavier Pieroni

I was about 10 seconds away from being an Xavier - my great grandfather's name.

I ended up being a Nathan instead. How boring.

Joe/Joseph?

I was always partial to the name "Crowley".

Tobias?  (Get him a barcode tattoo on the back of his neck at birth, and then show him Hitman when he's 20 with the order to "go out and kill!")

Angelo/Angela Pieroni

My immediate family has such boring names: Tom, Ben, Susan, Jake, Evan (last two are my sister's kids).  But I can't trace back far enough in my family tree to find a first born male child that wasn't named Thomas or Tomas (can't find the accent).  Tomas goes quite well with your last name.

My wife already is thinking of girl names.. and she's not even pregnant yet. Audrey, Charlotte, and Eloise have all made the short list.  The boy name list is rather lonely: Thomas.

A buddy of mine with a very Italian last name recently named his new son Dominic.

Bob.

I like Sean, it's on my list for 'names-if-I-ever-have-a-son-oh-god-kids-too-soon-too-soon'.  But then, I'm a quarter Irish and have an Irish last name, so it fits.  You'd know better than I if it it's an odd Scottish name.  Or Casey, but that doesn't really go with the last name. 

Girl names I like - Amanda, Alexis, Claire/Clare

Welshy.

One of the editors at my work is Scottish, his name is Ruaridh (rory). Thats pretty decent.

Doesn't William fly as a suitable name?

If that doesn't work, go with Strazos. It's a totally awesome name.

I am Signe Lorraine, my mother was Lilliana Rotillia, my father is Sigurd Lars and my sister is Linda Sue.  Only go with my sister's name if you live in a trailer in Brewton, Alabama.

One thing being at a school with a large foreign contingent has taught me is that you want to give your kid a unique and exotic (though not hippy-ish) name.  It really is an asset in life.

How about Miles?

A few from my family: Nicholas, Caedmon, Matthew, Joel, Julian, Lyle.  (I think "Caedmon" sounds particularly good in a Scottish accent.)

Oops I thought the thread title was "sponsor a schild."

I'll be leaving now.

edit: I see nebu made the same mistake, we must be smoking the same substance.

I sussed right away since Schild is the illegitimate foster child of Righ and I.

Hey!  Call him Schild!  Or Sloopy!

Schild Pieroni.

I like it very much.  Sloopy is nearly as nice.

Hang on. Sloopy?










Hang on...

My mom wanted to name me Dana. Luckily my dad also thought it was a silly name for a bloke.

Guys names in my family... Darren, Duane, Kevin, Michael, James, Gary, Barry.

Damn my grandparents wern't very creative.

Still think my suggestion was the best. Angelo Pieroni would end up becoming famous. Count on it :)

Male names from my family:
 
Gerald, Otto, Severin, Hans, Nels, Richard, Christian, Ken, Charles, John, Ray...

My brother is Ming (totally out of place from the others...).

Male names in my family-

John
Jason
Joshua
Samuel
Malcolm
Robert
Daniel
Frank
Joel
Curt
Matthew
Michael
Roderick (my dad's middle name and half my middle name- Patrick)
Brett
Luke

Sigurd is an awesome name. I dislike normal names like Dave, Bob, Tom, etc. I have a slightly, but not very, odd name. But I think I'll be changing it to Cash. It's what my dad wanted to call me.

"You're so money and you don't even know it! "

Marky
Ricky
Danny
Terry
Mikey
Davey
Timmy
Tommy
Joey
Robby
Johnny
Brian

Fixed that, Schildy.

(if you were a girl, and I was your real mum, I would have named you Hildy.  Keep it in mind just in case you procreate or have the surgery)

He was quoting "Good Will Hunting".  (I think)

Then he should have said as much.  If he were a dog, and I were his real owner, I'd smack on the nose with a rolled up newspaper.

Then I'd shoot him.

Don't tell Dana Carvey.

Who's Dana Carvey?

Lloyd Pieroni

Since your Scottish with a foreign last name, might as well go for broke and give you child a really foreign first name.  Like, Takehiko or something.


Pryanka Pieroni?

Just save some effort and name him "No" or "Stop" or some other word you will be yelling at him all the time.

Alcohol Pieroni.

Declan or Schild.

Yeah, my parents always told me they should have named me Damnit.

Octavian.

Maximilian Pieroni.

Say it out loud and tell me that isn't a pimp name.

Max for short is awesome too.

Boy's names are hard. Girls are easy.

Letsee: Mic, Kyle, Davian...

see? that's all I got.

Ethan or Caleb

Oi!

No, really... name him Oi.

Hmm - somehow I see this thread repeating itself in a few months...

(We too have picked a girl's name) Needless to say, keep em coming...

My wife has veto'd my suggested names of Gunther and Bertha (My plan was to have their names keep them from having sex for the first 20+ years of their lives.)

Edmond Dantes Pieroni

Gunther would result in kickass halloween costumes if you got your kid into Deus Ex.

This would have been much easier if your last name had actually been "Wood".  Then you could have selected from such names as:

Three
Metal (like a chip of the old block)
Tiger Panther!
Morning

Hmm.  Somebody mentioned Xavier, which is both bad-ass and fits the last name...but can the average scot pronounce that correctly without bleeding out the ears?  In all seriousness, I'd go after a more international name, perhaps with some kind of Italian/Latin slant on it.  It is hard to imagine a classic scottish name fitting well with your last name.

Alexander (one of my favorite)
Daniel (better than Dana for a boy, and fits last name)
Robert

Names that can be modified (do you do this in Scotland?) can be nice to have.

Sebastian!

That's my name btw  :-D

You have my condolences.

I have to agree with Hat. Maximilian is seriously pimp :)

It works well with my family name, so if I ever have a kid (THE HORROR!) I might suggest it :P

Maximillian is the sort of name that's given to people who will be the hier to some sort of stupid fortune.

Xavier is good, if only because Xavier from Highlander was The Shit.

Name your kid Methos.

Wait, nah, Schild. I've always liked the sound of Schild.

How about Grandpa? That'll fuck 'im up nicely! Oh wait, maybe that's not the goal. This is why I won't have kids.

Magnus Pieroni and you can guarantee that at some point he will be competing for the World's Strongest Man.

I had the same name and thought proces as I was scrolling through this list.

Roger,
Landon,
Tyson
Brandon or Brendan, which has Celtic roots.
Christian

Go with Maximillian, but change his last name to Power.

"There's the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way."
"Isn't that the wrong way?"
"Yeah, but faster."

So some more names, okay:

Adrian

Arkady (this one is especially good if you want him to be a mad scientist or serial killer)

Cletus (Do it. Do it now. Name him Cletus.)

Dorian (I actually hate this name because I knew a punk kid named Dorian, but some people haven't had that exerience so they may feel different)

I like the Xavier suggestion.  It's both the world's most powerful telepath and the coolest character on Guitar Hero.  How can you go wrong?

Scotty McScottScottScotterNotItalianson.   I don't know.  Christ, don't they have websites for this?

People in my family are named:
Gregg
Andrew
Wayne
William
Brian
Gary
Bernard
Christopher
Travis
Steve

That's all the guys in my family.  I have the most exotic name out of all of them (Gregg with two Gs at the end, thanks Mom & Dad- strap yourself in and feel the Gs!!) and it's really not that great a name.

I do like Wayne as a name, but I can't imagine addressing anyone under the age of 30 as Wayne.  Probably because it's both my Dad's and Grandpa's name.

(http://tkey.net/blog/images/rooney1.jpg)

He'd stamp you in the junk for that.  He's a bit touchy though.

I have no idea who that is.

I cultivate my ignorance of all sport related things like a zen garden.  It blooms, despite your efforts.

Maybe you'd recognise him this way? 

(http://www.therecord.com/images/kwr/kwr1334337_2.jpg)

Still, when I think of Waynes, I think of this one:

(http://www.unl.edu/scarlet/v8n25/wayne.jpg)

Not a name I would pick.  But, then, I'm the one who likes Sloopy.   :-)

So you want Ironwood to raise an Ohio State fan?

I don't know.  What does an Ohio State fan do?

Roots for criminals and annoys Michigan fans, for the most part.

My boy is Alec Gordon.  For nephews I have Ian, Aidan and Nicholas.

I married a Gordon.  They're lovely.

My newphews are Michael, Jesse and Shug (Hugh). 

Gordon is my father in law which is how that name got in there.  My dad's name was Harold so if we have another one I will insist on it being worked in there, probably as the middle name Hal (because I like the Shakespearean quality of it). We have a ton of Franks all over my family (it's my middle name for that reason, but I don't like it that much so I doubt we'd use it anywhere). 

We were going to go with Ian Hal for the next boy but my sister named her recently born son Ian so we don't know if we would go that route.

We probably aren't having another one anyways.

Alexander, or his historic opponent Darius. Both awesome names.

Celtic name: Niall. Italian name: Raul.

Mad foreign name: Gustav. Everybody will call him Gus in Glasgow, but you can go to cheese and wine parties and claim he was named after Mahler, Klimt, Holst, Hertz or Eiffel.

Name him Crom.  No one will ask him for help later on.

There is still an active lunatic fringe cult in parts of Ireland which worships Crom Cruaich, and among Scottish and Irish Catholics he's not unknown because he figures in St. Patrick's story. Not ideal if you want an easy time in Glasgow's schools, replete as they are with sectarian bullshit.

Xerxes.

Nope.

Seriously.  I completely tune out when I see a Nike symbol.  I know as much about this as your average Amish guy knows about Britney Spears.  You can keep showing me pictures of K.Fed, but it isn't gonna click.

Back to names:

How about August?  I met a guy named that, but he goes by Gus.  I kept thinking it was a waste of a pretty good name.

Guildenstern Rosencrantz Pieroni

When he is CEO of a major multinational people will just call him G.R. anyway.

Charles Emerson Pieroni

Sounds great when I say it with my Groundskeeper Willie voice. Plus, it's what we're naming our first son, aside from the Pieroni part.

Um.


Isn't that the guy from MASH ?

I'm still cheering for Sloopy.

Yup, Charles Emmerson Winchester III.
Cool enough name, but not the first character in that show I'd name a child after. Beats Frank Burns I guess.

Desmond.

Lost?

Indeed, but it strikes me as a cool name.

There aren't a lot of male names in my family, and they're either boring or strange:
Mark
Jonathan
Prentice
Oswald
Jeffrey
Philip

Since my middle name is Siobhan and I'm short on decent male names, how about Sean (as suggested before), Shawn or whatever the Scottish derivative is?

I'm stuck with Clearblue Seneca

My vote goes for Bruce.

You mean, mean man.

I don't think I've said "Schild" on page 3 yet.

My pet monkey in EQ2 is named Schild.  The other one is named Ookii.  (which rhymes with kookii)

Hang on, sloopy. Sloopy, hang on.

Late to the thread:

Stone
Cole
Wendell
Archibald (have a bunch of these on the Scottish side of the family tree)
James (alternated with Archibald for about 6 generations)
Dimmock

Actually, Dimmock Pieroni sounds quite cool although I am having a hard time putting a Scottish accent on it.

You, above all others, are on drugs.

Successful names for boys for the 21st century:

Angus
Aristotle
Adolph
Axl
Blaise
Carl-Gustav
Eminem
Friederich
Nigel Zinc-Trumpet Harris Pieroni  III
Larouche
Saddam!

Why the obsession with getting people to think Ironwood's child is from Ohio?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hang_On_Sloopy

Oh, the kid is to be a scottsman!? Why didn't you say so. Call him Glenfiddich. Everyone will know then.

Tater Salad.

Shodan

I think you mean Scotttttsman. Also, I prefer Bruichladdich.

Oh, I like this one.  Well, the tater bit, maybe not the salad.  I don't like it as much as Sloopy, but it's good.  I didn't know Sloopy had such a history with Ohio... is that a bad thing or a good thing?

Shh, I'm trying to bait Signe

You'll never catch me using that sort of bait!  Diamond mines are a good start, however.

Because Sig is all about enslaving africans under a military regime supported by western capitalism.

I attended community college in Brewton.

That is a dirty lie. We all know there are no colleges in the Deep South. At least ones that educate people instead of being an excuse to play SEC football  :evil:

SHODAN is a girl's name.  And it should be ALL CAPS.

For a boy, I suggested several names before my wife stopped listening to me.  One was Xander, and one was Siward after the mythical first Armstrong.  Another was Megatron.  A kid named Megatron isn't likely to have his lunch money stolen.  Skeletor was also suggested to me but didn't really fit.  My family mostly has boring traditional names like Robert and William, however there was a Romey, an Early and Alkis.  Early was not short for anything, and neither was Romey, which might have been spelt Romy.  My mom's stepdad was Ervin.

There's a guy that works for my wife's company named Hoak.  I like that one for some reason.

Alabama is littered with two-year schools, thanks to Lurleen B. Wallace.  Not ironically, she has one named after her.  Not the one in Brewton.  I should have gone to a four-year school, of which there are far fewer.

Once, while driving south out of Brewton, I saw a marquee next to a plywood juke-joint that read:

TONIGHT
      FOGHAT

If I wasn't afraid of being stabbed, I might have went to check it out.

How about Kal-el?

Yes, I know a kid named that.  No, he doesn't yet realize who he's named after.

Xander is short for Alexander and Cevik already named his son that.  I like Megatron, though.  Maybe even more than Sloopy or Ohio.  I would name my son Megatron.

Page 4?

Schild.

Bob? that's bit of a girl's name, isn't it?

Call him Rocco.

Works as an Italian name, because, it is one. But he can also be Rocky, Rock, and so on so he can still be a Scottish "hard man".


Or give him a name like "Macdonnel" as his first name, It'll confuse the shit out of his teachers, but it'll also sound pretty cool. "Macdonnel Pieroni".

Not Rocco.  That's the name of that naff chef with the reality show.  What a self-absorbed prancing little nancy he is, too.  I used to think that was a cool name.  He ruined it for me.  He is a babbling vagina. 

Looking over this thread, I see we've already had suggestions of both Anthony and Stone. These are workable, I suggest Stony Tony Pieroni.

I very nearly spewed coffee on my keyboard.  Nice.

Seconded.

Oh gods... the people here think I am nuts. I have been laughing hysterically about this thread in loud, highly disruptive guffaws completely unlike my typical behavior.

For some reason I just was waiting for someone to suggest Yankme Pieroni, but of all the suggestions I laughed the loudest at:

Something about that had me snorting and snickering until I had to get up and leave lest I get a visit from the boss-man.


Completely non-humorous male names from my family:
Hillard
Edward
Gilbert
Mark
Eric
Aron

First, Megatron is taken; we share a continent, so you'll have to pick something else.  You never know, I might get to name the next one.  Starscream was a close second, but has only two syllables, so you can use that one.  You want one name to have an odd number of syllables and the other to have an even number.  Megatron Armstrong.  For the win.

Pfft... What's with the obsession with bad guys?

Optimus Prime Pieroni

Has a nice ring to it, and his friends could ask each other, "You down with O.P.P?"

Starscream is a girly name.  Ironwood can't give his boy a girly name.  And don't worry... if I ever spontaneously pop a miracle sprog, I'll leave the name up to whoever owns the doorstep I choose. 

You can have Lion-O if you want.  I'm taking Mum-Ra.  See you at the T-ball game.

I don't think we've been much use to Ironwood Pieroni. 

Sorry!   :oops:

I suspect that he chuckled at a few and read them to Mrs Ironwood. At first she probably found it amusing, but as time wore on, she got annoyed, and expressed her annoyance at him in fiendish ways. Now whenever he chuckles while on his computer, he gets a steely stare, and has to explain how it wasn't a name on F13, it was the fate of a Gnome in Alterac Valley that made him chuckle.

A gnome called Rumpelstiltskin Pieroni.

Rumpelstiltskin?

/me pops.

I really like the name Ephram for a boy.

And Pascal would go well with your surname, I think.

Edit: I had a brawler great-uncle named Conrad, but he went by Coonie (as in "Uncle Coonie"). He threw a television set at a dude's head once.

Isn't Ephram one of the tubes in your cock ?

I think not.

The wife reads the thread herself.  As for me, I'm hoping like hell it's a girl.

Dude.

Schild.

SAY IT WITH ME.

SCHILD PIERONI

or, alternatively:

F13 Dot Net Pieroni

The second one doesn't roll off the tongue so well though.

But, honestly, I worry that if I call him Schild he may just grow up as tubby as you.

That wouldn't be good.

:)

The best you can come up with is tubby?

Weak.

I suggest naming him my alltime favourite internet baby name: Nathaniel T. Kittenstomp. You clearly can not go wrong with this name.

On a more serious note, i've always been fond of Phillip. It has a nice regal connotation to it. Alternatively, some kind of northern name such as Asmund, Einar or Hakon would suit the strong rugged Scotsman type who will one day behead people; that your son will undoubtedly grow up to be.

If you are unsure however, there is always Muad-Dib to fall back on.

I think "Bad Dudes" would make a good guys name.

Bad Dudes Pieroni.

That's almost better than Schild.

Almost.

Good suggestion. If there's any Scottish blood in the clan, and it's not just a bunch of Eyetalians, then you probably have Norse ancestors anyway.
Beowulf
Loke
Tor
Ragnar
Ebbe
Gudmund
Magnus
Hildegun
Gunnar
Asger
Rolf
Ragnhild

My family is half nordic and half germanic, so I have a bunch of these in my tree (my earliest traceable ancestors were highwaymen, murderes and rapists... how cool is that?)

You're gonna do this every page, right ?

Your ancestors worked for Halliburton?

You should name your kid after something fast. Maybe that way he won't be slow like Pop.

OH, BURN.

Not Bad Dudes.

Badass. Badass Pieroni.

Also, shouldn't Ephram be Ephraim?

Heh.  You and I can't afford to be Nemesis, Schild, since we're the only ones that are on this website ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

I wonder when you sleep.

Call him Krull, and all will tremble at his might.

Heh, I like that.

What's wrong with the name Schild, anyway?  Or Signe?  Or Stony Tony Pieroni?  What's your problem?  Pick one and be done with it.  You are running out of time!

Can't name him after internet handles.  I don't want to despise him horribly.

No Smed then?

That's how I want to keep it. :P

Schild is not an internet handle. It's my last name. Handles are things like "Go Go Team Korea" and "I'm So So Pretty" and "Ironwood."

Sorted.

Meanie.

That's your best suggestion so far.

Meanie Pieroni.

Signe is not an internet handle.  It's my name.  Handles are things like "Go Go Team Korea"  and "I'm So So Pretty" and "Schild."

I hate you people.

Husky. You're husky, honey.

I got dibs on F13 Dot Net.  Goddamnit.


And you.  I just don't like you.  Shut up!

Name him Link. Or more better: Mario.

Or Hornio.

I opted for Roman Alexander Bussey for my wee lil hatchling. 

I was aiming for Ronan initially, but his mother didn't care for it, and wanted to name him Gabriel, which I despised.

Monster names are always good!

Rodan
Godzilla
Mothra (a bit girly)
Ghidorah
King Kong
Cookie Monster
Dr. Phibes

Nameless One

Alternatively:

JC Denton Pieroni

So there have been a number of good names posted, and chances are you aren't going to get anything much better at this point.   I have two boys myself, and I can relate to your problem...for some reason, boys names all suck.  I think it is because they more easily related to current or historical persons of the same name (especially historical ones).  Whatever.  You should just agree on something that the both of you don't hate, and you'll probably find that the boy will grow into it quickly enough.

Barring that, go with Zod.  Can you imagine?  Your toddler, strutting around daycare...oh, I need to share the toys, do I?  Kneel before Zod!

Therein lies the problem.  As for the rest, you're probably right.

In our case, I was the one who hated everything.  I found a way around it, though.  I was, as mentioned above, associating names with historical or literary characters, people I have known as adults or in childhood with the same names.  Negative associations, for the most part, but not always.  The trick was in trying to understand my own irrational dislike for names being proposed and determining which ones I would eventually be able to get over.

Just to illustrate, here are some hypothetical examples of names, and the gut reaction I might have to them:

Alexander - what, like "The Great"?  Might as well call him Attilla.
Magnus - what, we going to enter him into a World's Strongest Man competition?
Jacob - you mean like the kid I knew in 3rd grade that always had a snotty nose?
Fred - you planning on giving birth to a 60 year-old?
Gunther - the name looks and sounds ugly to me

And so on.  I could literally come up with ridiculous stuff like that for every name.  What I figured out was that while some of my objections were based on personal experiences (which are more difficult to get past), others were very abstract and without merit.  On my fake list above, the last three will never, ever work.  I either actually hate the name, or I am associating it with something I will not be able to overcome.  The first two are irrational objections, and I need to get the fuck over myself.

This is quite literally the process I had to go through...separating the personal objections from the stupid ones.

Heh!

How about Constantine Pieroni? Valentine?

While you're on the villian kick, how about:

Mojojojo Pieroni


Personally I am sold on the PIEroni part and the first name matters not. I would just be pleased as punch to be able to call him PIE!

I've already nicknamed him Pepperoni.  He can beat me up when he's 11.

I wouldn't worry.  As someone who went through school being called that, and still   at the age of 32 get morons who think they're original by spouting it out, I'm quite sure young zeb will be utterly unable to care less.

You should go for a nickname that couldn't possibly have been thought of before, like Macaroni or something.

 :roll:

Shepherd PIEroni?

You could prepare him for the End Days with the name Jesus. Or Mel. Or Muhammad.

Or just go for the money and name him Exxon. Nobody fucks with Exxon.

Heh, I forgot you had that sig.  It makes me smile everytime I see it.  I cannot wait to hear what the Ironwood family vernacular sounds like! 

We should speculate on it!

"Ach I cannuh chill out!" - fucking adorable quote from Ironwood's kid

Whatever name you pick just make sure you get him one of these shirts:

(http://www.pokeruniversity.org/images/level1human.jpg)

Dude, that's fucking sweet.

UDD wins the internet today.

Well, Ironwood, seeing you're a computer geek, I think you should name your child in honor of this activity.

Microsoft Pieroni. Throw in some middle names just for emphasis. Microsoft Office Suite 2006 Service Pack 4 Pieroni.

Or go the open source route -- Linux Pieroni. Kinda close to Linus actually.

Awesome.

Historical villain name:
Cassanova Frankenstein Pieroni

Don't roll your eyes at me!  You can't even begin to know the torture growing up with a name like "Signe!"  God, I could SO poke you with a pointy stick right now!

Jabba
Zabar
Mustafa
Jingles
Soda
Joey-jojo-shabado

Hmm. You missed Jar Jar.

That's what the rifle range lessons are for.

Oh and Jub-Jub.

If boy's names are causing you so much trouble, why not give him a girl's name?  It sounds as if y'all have agreed on those.

Also, Simon Belmont Pieroni. Alternatively, Julius Belmont Pieroni.

Kratos Pieroni

Lum Pieroni?

Then again, how many Cletus's are there there?

A former associate of mine named his son "Jade".

yes, that's right. Jade. Not Jadyn. Jade.


The little tyke is now set up well to be either a hippy chick, or a stripper. Well, except for the male bits attatched.


I suspect his wife had a bigger hand in it than he did, and that his balls are in her purse.



I still say Rocco is the go. His role models can be the world's most famous Italian Porn Actor, a fictional Italian-American world heavyweight champion boxer, or a Samoan-African-American World champion wrestler-turned-actor.

Or all three.

Hey, UD_Delt. Where did you get that and does it come in a size 2T?


I want one for the munchkin.

Here's one source:

http://www.jinx.com/scripts/details.asp?affid=-1&productID=461

I'm such a geek. I need one of these (just not in the sizes they have available):

(http://www.jinx.com/images/products/328bgBlack.jpg)

All Your Base is a bit played out, no?

That site rocks!

(http://www.jinx.com/images/products/283bgBlack.jpg)

Oh hell yes.

That's hot.

(http://www.jinx.com/images/products/386bgBlack.jpg)

Free the mallocs!

I knew a guy named Jade in college.  Incredibly smart, but not so masculine.  I'm sure he cries into his paycheck every month about it.

Only if it isn't a Unix gag.

root# got a light?
csh: got: No match.

Your damn T-shirt site is distracting me.

I wanted to suggest Castor.  Yes, after a certain Mr. Troy.  Hell fucking yes.