f13.net

No, not illegal downloading. Fucking piracy (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27766333/). Somalian pirates snagged a Saudi supertanker. This shit is getting out of hand. The USN needs to start patrolling and stomping ass around there.

We are, along with every other navy in the world.  Problem is we are bound by international agreements, like everybody else.

Personally though, I think before to long we are going to just have to say fuck it and Napalm Eyl and all its inhabitants until there isn't anything left standing.  Hard to do that while they are holding so many hostages though.  Would probably need an OK to "send in the Marines" to physically capture the town, try to rescure hostages, and destroy anything of use in the town before pulling out.  But in the current international environment, I'm not seeing this happen any time soon.

Also, HOW THE FUCK did they capture that fucking super tanker?  I mean seriously, its fucking massive, and I know they mainly run around on small boats.  Its boggling my mind as to how they could even board it..

Higher gas prices just in time for the travel season!

That's been building up for a while. Somalis have been snagging and ransoming vessels there for months. Sadly the US so too focused on the Persian gulf to want to admit that there is a FAR more serious problem that REALLY threatens world peace and trade not that far away. It would be a distraction for the really important crude. And the media has been playing right along as they didn't know how to spin this.

But yeah, it needs a forge of frigates and destroyers constantly patrolling that area. The Suez canal is vital, and the last thing the world needs right now is a disruption in trade.

And this probably might be better off in politics.

The tanker in question has a crew of 25. That's pretty standard from a report I heard on NPR this morning.

Also, according to the same report pirate attacks are intercepted day in and day out. This one slipped through the cracks.

Yeah, I'm not talking about crew size.  I'm more talking about what could any number of somolies in tiny motor boats possibly do to that ship.  All the tanker had to do was keep going.  Not like they could stop it from the sea.  How did they even get on board?  Firing grappling hook guns and climbing up, all the while the crew doesn't notice?

How did they get on board?
Depending on how long it had been since the pilot (the person hired from shore to navigate the vessel out of port/channel) disembarked, the pilot ladder could have still been in place.

Keep going?
Slow moving object (12.5 knots is about average).

Why did they stop?
Perhaps they were threatened via radio that if they didn't stop, they (the pirates) would use explosives in the boat (regardless if they actually had explosives in the boat) to blow a huge freakin' hole in the ship causing the loss of $100 million dollars worth of crude, the loss of the tanker itself, and an unmeasurable cost to the environment.  And that doesn't count the effect the loss of the crude in terms of world wide supply, albiet it would be recoverable over time.  (Edit) School of thought is to preserve the ships crew, the ship itself, and it's cargo through negotiation with the pirates IF the pirates manage to overtake the ship.

Another edit:  From a Fairplay article on the subject (requries account to view):

make sense given Gulf War 1 & 2.  Curious to know the logic why they haven't so far.

Easy solution :

(http://img231.imageshack.us/img231/2016/080125rambohmed4phmediuro9.jpg) (http://imageshack.us)

Ah those wacky pirates. They are gonna use that money to get more rum and wenches, no doubt.  :awesome_for_real:

On a very superficial level, pirating a $100m oil tanker sounds like amazing fun.

Until Rambo shows up.

Indeed. Although having seen the size of a Supertanker I am amazed as to how the pirates even get aboard. It must take a minute or two just to climb up the side of one of those.



I saw a news interview a couple of months back with some Somali fishermen who had turned to piracy because

a) Fishing sucks and makes them no money
b) The Pirates kept stealing their boats.

Also they live in a country that effectively has no central government at all, the average life expectancy is around 35 years and a lot of the world's money floats past every day.

Yeah. the guys that do this are regarded as heroes in Somalia. They will be singing songs about their heroism and bravery in a short amount of time. And this is probably the only way they have of bringing money in the country so even if there was a real goverment they would have no interest in stopping it. Basically, the world trade dies them no goo, so let it rot.

Think is there is no one person you can turn to to stop this, so the usual "buy dictator/crime lord 5 hookers and a mercedes" angle won't work here, so they will have to find some other solution to the new situation of being vulnerable to several thousand guys sniffing for crumbs on fast moving speed boats.

Holy shit, guys, I just came up with the solution to the energy crisis.  GET THE PIRATES ON THE INTERWEBS TO MAKE COPIES OF OIL OVER BITTORRENT.

Your Avatar suddenly makes sense.

Hi. (http://www.blackwaterusa.com/)

Outsourcing you say? Here come the Indians (http://voanews.com/english/2008-11-19-voa11.cfm), and they aren't mucking about.

I'm with India, this has gone on too long and since Somalia doesn't have a functioning government, I don't understand the international agreements stuff. It's piracy on the high seas, isn't that what navies were created for? Shores of Tripoli and all that?

Lots of stuff about failed states, knocking over anthills without a plan, and Bush's incompetence.

On the other hand, I can't understand why anyone in Somalia would do this since according to libertarian theory, it is paradise.

I haven't really kept up much on this story, but is there really any realistic way for them to launder 100 million in crude oil?

Use a grease-cutting soap.

Good thing we got the evil imperialists out of Africa. They've done so much with the place. FREEDOM!!! DEMOCRACY!!  :oh_i_see:

You don't launder it, you sell it back to the country you stole it from via ransom and hope they don't send fighter jets out to sink the motherfucker.

I imagine with the price of oil tanking these days, the Saudis didn't mind something to restrict the flow of oil out of the Middle East. Hell, they might even have hired the pirates to do it.

You don't scoop $100million worth of oil out in buckets. Without some pretty impressive equipment it's not really feasible for anyone to empty a supertanker let alone deal with the onshore logistics of moving that much oil. As I understand it, they have no heavy port equipment at all meaning that any bulky cargo (such as those Sudanese Kenyan tanks that were seized recently) can't realistically be unloaded. Ransoming the ship back or somehow selling the whole vessel along with the cargo is pretty much their only option for disposing of the goods.

It isn't a problem with agreements with Somalia, it has to do with stuff like the Law of the Sea which everybody signed on to.  Things like, you can't open up on a ship even if they look like pirates, you either have to send a boarding party to verify, or catch them in the act.  So basically, you have to catch them in the act, which is tricky, as they launch lighting attacks and there's only a small window for a (hopefully) nearby naval ship to intervene and stop them from boarding.  Once they are on board, theres nothing the navy can do.

Anyways, BBC wrote up a decent article on the problems:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/7735144.stm

Aren't we already in trouble for sending the military out there to whip ass on people fairly close to Somalia? Why does the USN have to be the one? We are kicked in the nuts over trying to be the "World Police" on a daily basis, and this is a world problem and not specific to the US...

India stepping up today is some great news. There are times when someone has to do the job, no question, but perhaps it shouldn't always be Uncle Sam? Let someone soak up the bad PR for doing the job.

INDIA, FUCK YEAH!

Solution's easy:



Send for Ninjas!

Good for India.

If it had been the USN, the world leaders and media would be blasting us for acting like the police of the world and condemning our actions.

Anyway, the best thing to do to curtail piracy in these areas is give the crews a means to defend themselves.  Small arms training, hand to hand combat training, and that sort of thing, along with a small cache of weapons.  The problem is that port authorities pretty much forbid firearms from being on merchant vessels.  Pirates know this, and view merchants as easy prey - which they are.

The crazy thread is thataway (http://forums.f13.net/index.php?topic=13110.0).

We're the world's foremost naval power and the need to curbstomp honest-to-god high seas pirates is about as clear cut as it's ever going to get. And yes, good on India for sinking the shit out of that mothership.

I recently read The Years Best SF 13, and it had a short story in it (Pirates of the Somali Coast) about the Hollywood glamorization of pirates.

Was actually pretty good.

I might just go out of the game development business and become a professional pirate-hunter if this keeps up. I have, after all, several years of experience hunting pirates in the West Indies in realistic pirate and pirate-hunting simulators such as the original Sid Meier's Pirates!, Sea Dogs, etc.

Today I was talking to an American who lives in India, who says Indians still have British colonial attitudes ingrained in their culture. I am picturing the Indian navy ...

"What ho, Rajiv, pirate mothership off the starboard bow!"
"Shall I send him two pounds of Hindustani hell?"
"Jolly good show. How about some tea and dhal?"

That's why I'm skeptical in the extreme about any peace keeping operations there.  Crazy shit is just bound to happen in Africa.  I think you come out of the womb wielding a rusty machete there.

Now that's just  :uhrr:
I wouldn't even know where to start right now, but this isn't the politics forum, so I'll just try to keep it to myself...

Don't worry.  This is a thread about the actual pirating of a massive oil tanker by evil forces in exotic foreign locations.  It has sex, violence and intrigue, and is therefore destined for the Politics forum.

I don't want to get another thread tossed into politics, but I just believe that some parts of the world are pretty much fucked.  Africa being the biggest one.  It's not as simple as saying, "Well, you need to get rid of the corruption", because Africa just has so much working against it. 

If the tribalism, corruption, child soldiers, frequent famines, and nasty endemic diseases weren't enough there's also the culture to consider.  This is a place where the majority of the population has no education and stuff like magic is still very much believed in.  Shit, just the other day I read a story about hunchbacks being targeted and killed in Zimbabwe (I think it was Zimbabwe, in any case) because their humps are believed to have magic powers.  This is a place where the Lords Resistance Army can come out of the woodwork and tell their child soldier slaves that they're immune from bullets because of powerful magic their leader possesses.  Or how about Liberia where you have 14 year old kids in dresses and wigs running around with AK's calling themselves names like "Corporal Death".

Africa's fucked.  If the past 5 years should have taught us anything it's that you can't save the world, and really shouldn't try.  By all means, quarantine the disease, but curing it is a recipe for failure.

Africa and the middle east are what happens when humans have been around too long in the same area. Most people on the planet got fed up and left.

Shit, change child soldiers for rednecks, famine for obesity, and I could swear you were talking about the States.  Including the magic bit. :why_so_serious:

In the middle east the issues are far different.

On the issue of government corruption I heard an interesting interview the other day with the author of a book on corruption in cultures, (edit: link (http://www.amazon.com/Economic-Gangsters-Corruption-Violence-Poverty/dp/0691134545)) looking at what cultures have more corruption and the effect it seems to have on the country. Intersting point the guy raised is that corruption =! chaotic government with the example of Indonesia which is one of the most corrupt governments in the world but does a good job of distributing aid and has one of the fastest growing economies in the world.

The other interesting element was one of his tests for how open to corruption a society is (and so probably has some bearing on how corrupt it actually is) which involved comparing criminal charges, traffic violations, etc. brought against diplomatic staff on the grounds that they are examples of how people from that culture behave when totally immune from legal coercion. The results aren't exactly shocking, Nigeria was one of the worst while Sweden came out on top (I believe they didn't have a single criminal charge or unpaid parking fine in the last 25 years or so).

Africa as a whole has some pretty fucked countries but the whole continent isn't a write off. South Africa has serious crime problems and isn't dealing with AIDS very well but I wouldn't really call it a third world nation. Places like Kenya aren't doing too badly (edit: Feel I should add that also shows how low the bar is in Africa) and North Africa isn't nearly as badly off as places like the Congo. One could also make an argument that many of the big problems affecting these African nations is the fact that they're made of arbitrary lines drawn on maps by European powers, at best with no thought towards ethnic and tribal territories already there, at worst designed to create conflict among them so they couldn't rise up against their colonial masters. Of course maybe we should just ignore the horrible things going on there and if they want to let them kill themselves they may do so and decrease the surplus population.

Yeah, but on the other hand South Africa in it's current form began as a state relatively recently, and with a high level of development.  The trendline has been downward ever since, and I have no reason to think that it's going to turn around any time soon.  I look at Zimbabwe as being on the same sort of track, it's just further along it.

Am I the only one pulling for the pirates?  :drill:

Yes. Death to pirates.

Which is an awesome thing to get to say.  :awesome_for_real:

Possibly, they've still got democracy though and even the prospect of the main party losing power. They've also seen what's happened to Zimbabwe so there's a tiny chance that will show them it's not a good idea to start confiscating everyone's property and handing it over to random people that can't really utilise it.

Hum :    Palin Witchcraft  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwkb9_zB2Pg)

:awesome_for_real:

Not to defend Palin, because I do think she's a fucking idiot, but honestly, what would you do in that situation?  It's not like she said, "Yes!  Save me from witches, because they're really making my life a pain in the ass."  Most of us would probably do what she did; just keep our mouths shut and not make a scene.

How about this as a more relevant example (http://www.asknow.com/Landingbx.aspx).

No you see that's entirely different, because they drive SUVs and don't live in grass huts :P

They also don't engage in cannibalism (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/2661365.stm) or have sex with babies and virgins to get rid of their AIDS (http://www.scienceinafrica.co.za/2002/april/virgin.htm).

We're far too civilized for that. We only eat the flour-based body of Jesus every Sunday and engage in poligamist marriage to minors :P All I'm saying is that its a matter of degree, but not kind.

You forgot that we also drink his blood.  :oh_i_see:

Also, since we're taking the trash and making it rule, we lynch people with black skin.

International law is one thing on paper, but the reality is that states do whatever they want unless someone wants to send an army in to haul somebody into ICC.  The only thing that forces the US to obey international law is US law that requires government agencies to obey treaties; i.e. it's a problem if US soldiers violate the UN Convention Against Torture because the US has adopted the Convention as US law. If the US said "we're going to shock some terrorists in the balls and blast shitty little Somali pirates out of the water" nobody else on earth would do anything about it.   


If the Saudis hired some kind of contractors to kill every Somali within 30 miles of that tanker, and take it back, nobody would give a fuck, and therefore, there would be no repercussions under international law.

Meh, the international problem is extremely straight forward.  "Don't start blasting the pirates because that would scare them, scared pirates kill hostages and destroy ships and cargo."

At the moment the hostages are all well taken care of everything is handled cleanly and the only things hurt are some portion of the profits of the cargo.  No one wants to upset what really is a minor problem by throwing stuff around.

It's not even that complex tbh. The number one issue is that a pirate ship looks like every other fucking vessel in the region right up to the point where the crew break out the ak-47s and hit the dinghies. No navy on the planet is going to start sinking ships at random on the off chance of hitting a pirate. They don't have red names floating over their heads or a jolly roger flying from the mast.

I don't believe Africa is like that. It's underdeveloped. If anything, I don't think it's had it's true day in the sun as far as civilization goes. Not a chance. These may all be birthpangs to it, if you will. Maybe it'll be a great place one day.


The Middle East is strictly political. It's civilization gone awry.

Pirate 'mothership' was really Thai fishing boat (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/africa/article5235404.ece)

woops


Yarrrrr
(http://exiledonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/060706-modern-pirates_big-450x397.jpg)

Since when did the Sand People go to sea? What do they do with their banthas?

Since ever.

We're calling them sand peoples now? Oh PC, is there anything that you won't ruin?

Whoosh! :awesome_for_real:

On one hand, I didn't get the reference.
On  the other hand, it proves that i'm not a Star Wars geek.

I'll write it off as a win.  :awesome_for_real:

You also just missed a perfect opportunity to use a 'on the gripping hand reference.

I think you may be on the wrong website.

Gave up on Larry Niven after the first ringworld. His fault for making the guy a drug hobo.

I DO know what yaranaika is, though, and can eat any sort of food while looking at the pain series, so I guess that evens things out.  :awesome_for_real:

If this were the tv/scifi forum, you'd be right.

Well, if any military gets their thumb out of their ass, the problem will end briefly; these guys aren't exactly the brightest bulbs.  I remember something like a year ago, some pirates decided to pick a fight with a US missile cruiser.  A big-ass warship that can rain missiley death anywhere within hundreds of miles, and they shot at it.  And right next to the missile cruiser was a fucking missile destroyer, so just to put the cherry on top these retards shot not just at a warship, but a FLEET of warships.

Needless to say, once they finished laughing the sailors proceeded to soundly blow the hell out of the pirates.  Which is what will happen on a wider scale as soon as any navy steps up to handle the issue.

On the funnier side of the issue, some of our radical islamist friends have decided that they're unhappy about Saudi ships being hijacked, and declared that they're going to do something about it.  Pirates vs. terrorists vs. ninjas on the high seas, yar!

Sounds like the next multiplayer blockbuster from Valve.

I dreamed for Black Lagoon styled mmorpg for years. Shooting tankers with RPGs ownz!

Oceania Cruises' Nautica successfully evaded an attempt by pirates to seize the ship, the company said today. The statement is as follows:

"On November 30, 2008, at approximately 0928 local time, 0528 GMT, M/S NAUTICA was transiting through the Gulf of Aden within the prescribed Maritime Safety Protection Area which is patrolled by international anti-piracy task forces. As the vessel sailed past several groups of non-hostile fishing vessels, two small skiffs were sighted by the Officer on Duty and deemed potentially hostile. The skiffs, approaching from a range of approximately 1000 meters, attempted to intercept the vessel's course.

"Captain Jurica Brajcic and his officers immediately began evasive maneuvers and took all prescribed precautions. NAUTICA was immediately brought to flank speed and was able to out run the two skiffs. One of the skiffs did manage to close the range to approximately 300 yards and fired eight rifle shots in the direction of the vessel before trailing off. No one aboard NAUTICA was harmed and no damage was sustained.

"All guests and crew onboard are safe and there were no injuries. All requisite international authorities have been notified and all anti-piracy precautions were in place prior to the event and all necessary measures were taken during the event."





The Gulf of Aden lies between the Red Sea and the Arabian Sea. Bordered by Djibouti and Somalia to the south west, and Yemen, to the north, this waterway is a mere 18 miles wide at its narrowest point (the Bab el Mandab Strait). It's one of the most dangerous places in the world for ships, cargo and cruise vessels alike, to pass through due to increased piracy in the area.

This is actually the second time this year that pirates have zeroed in on a cruise ship. Le Ponant, a three masted luxury vessel, was seized in April by Somali pirates. That vessel was carrying 30 crew members -- though no passengers -- and after an eight day standoff those onboard were rescued. The ship ultimately was also rescued and pirates were captured.

Seabourn Spirit successfully outran a pirate attack in December 2005.

Most cruise ships that transit this most dangerous of international waterways are equipped with anti-piracy weaponry. A cruise captain whose ship traveled from the Mediterranean to the Seychelles already this fall, told Cruise Critic that particularly effective is a sonic device that is in essence like a heavy duty stereo speaker. It sends a sonic wave out to a directed target, punishing with a sound so potentially powerful that it bursts eardrums and shocks pirates into dropping weapons and losing focus.





If the Gulf of Aden is so dangerous why do cruise ships continue to sail through it? "Right now the Gulf of Aden is the most viable gateway between the Mediterranean and Asia says Oceania Cruises' Tim Rubacky. The only other option is to feature itineraries that cruise down the west coast of Africa and there's a reason why few cruise lines offer such trips. It adds an additional 20 - 30 days to an already lengthy trip.

For instance, next fall, Princess Cruises' Ocean Princess, on its way from Europe to the Far East that skips the Gulf of Aden, will sail two repositionings to get to Singapore, the ultimate destination. The first is a 31 night Dover to Capetown cruise. There are just 13 ports of call on the schedule and most, aside from Lisbon, Le Havre, Casablanca and Dakar, are anything but household names. Ocean Princess will then depart from for a 32 night Capetown to Singapore voyage; with just nine stops on land, sea days again vastly outnumber port calls.

In contrast, when Oceania Nautica returns to Europe next April, it will do so via a 35 night cruise between Hong Kong and Athens. That's literally half the length of a voyage around Africa.

As well, the region isn't as risky for cruise ships as it clearly has been for cargo vessels and oil tankers (which is why the occasional cruise ship run-in with pirates makes significantly more headlines). Cruise ships are less of an easy target with significantly larger crew members and less easy-to-access open deck space

Same reason cargo ships sail through it:  Shortest distance between two points.

The cruise lines are kinda fucked in that regard.  They can't get escort ships, it would scare the shit out of the passengers to have a destroyer ambling next to the ship for the trip.  They can't add extra weeks to the travel time without losing too many passengers; the people who can afford to take a month-long cruise are few and far between compared to the people who can afford a week or two.  And if some pirate assholes row over and take some potshots at their ship, they'll surely wind up refunding the passengers' money at the end.

I wonder how long it'll be/how bad it'll have to get before someone decides to resurrect the Q-ship (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Q_ship) idea to try and deal with this or just go all out with naval patrols, etc.

A while ago. NPR had some anti-piracy experts on a couple weks ago and all pretty much agreed that q-ships were the best route to go for the time being. Also be the cheapest. Putting marine detachments and adding some pintle mounts to random ships is cheap and easy. Not sure what the laws regarding that would be though.

I don't see that the law would have much to say.  There's no law saying you can't have a platoon of marines sitting around in a cargo ship.  If someone just happens to try to board the ship with guns, and those people just happen to be shot by the marines, well, that's their own fault, isn't it?  As long as the ship is passive and doesn't start any fights, I don't think there are any legal issues to deal with.  The thing could be considered a warship and as such probably oughtn't be sailing in any country's territory, but in the open sea...

Growing tired of sitting on oil tankers, pirates attack cruise ship off Somali coast (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/cruises/3538744/Pirates-attack-cruise-ship-off-Somali-coast.html) (and fail). This can only end well.

That was exactly what popped into my head five minutes ago, obviously the concept is not new to naval history.  Disguise a warship as a cruise ship and BOOM!  Blasted to hell.  Eliminates the problem of mistakenly sinking trawlers, since you let them attack first.

Of course, the pirates would probably evolve by taking hostages out with them on pirate runs to use as shields  :?

That only works if you don't pretend not to see the hostages before you sink the pirate boat.  :drill:

There was an article on BBC about how they deliver the ransom money to them:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/7752813.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/7752813.stm)

Working for private security firms sounds exciting. Maybe I should quit my office job.

Video (http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=6fe_1228434538) of how a Danish patrol boat had to rescue 7 pirates who were lost at sea.

Other side of the pirate story.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/you-are-being-lied-to-abo_b_155147.html

If they were only attacking these illegal fishery boats or the ships dumping waste, I'd gladly see their side of things.  As it is there isn't an eyeroll emoticon big enough for the nativity and self-hate mentality dripping out of the article.

(http://www.somalitalk.com/sun/sun3.jpg)

The first part of his article is OK. Pirates had some positives back in the day (besides just being awesome). They were more multiracial and gender inclusive than the rest of society; fairly merciful to those that they captured (in many cases, pirates all were just victims once, and were given a chance to be recruited.. even the greatest pirate of all time, bart roberts, was a captured navigator before he changed his career); and last, but not least, they actually took the idea of "freedom" to it's full conclusion. No bullshit with these guys.

[edit] Also, they had flags.

Didn't they have a crude form of insurance or something too?

I don't know about that, but I imagine they had a decent vacation plan.. and a guaranteed fancy funeral deal at sea.

Maybe one or two groups of pirates had some ideals like you mention but the the vast number were just out to make a buck by committing strong arm robbery on the high seas.  The vast majority of piracy was, and is, unorganized.  Usually, just a small group of people with a boat who prey on lone ships as they cut through some narrows or straight or other hazard.

As far as organized pirates go, well, they've been recorded in history as long as there has been a history.  Multiracial?  Uh, not.  Mostly they were specific racial groups (Vikings, Barbary coast, several different ethnic groups around the Med, Chinese, South Seas Islanders, Indian, etc...).  Gender inclusive?  Yeah, sure they were well known for raping, there are accounts of Viking raids that raped and killed entire convents, that's pretty inclusive.  Merciful?  Sure, as long as you were worth ransoming, otherwise no (ships don't hold that many people and food and water can be very scarce, you see?).  And Freedom?  Hahahaha, most of the worlds REAL pirates were slavers.

Srsly, stop watching Disney movies.

Actually, I watch Captain Harlock movies. Hello? /points to avatar


Really though, I've read a few pirate books (in fact, I've recommended all of them here, out of the total of 5 or 6 books I've ever recommended in any book thread). I'm no historian, but I can, at the very least, have a conversation about the subject, if you're done condescending.

You're off about Vikings. There were good number of (at least recorded) female Captains among the Vikings. Sure the Vikings raped and laid waste to towns. They weren't "pirates" in any typical sense. They were committing acts of war. On other nations, on other religions. It was far more complex than piracy (not excusing "rape"... just saying that it was what it was.. war). There were female Captains in the Orient too.

Female leadership was actually a bigger trend elsewhere than in the European/Carribean side of piracy -- but there were some notable women in authority on this side of the world too. Probably the most famous ones were Anne Bonny and Mary Read, who were only second under Jack Rackham.

Multiracialism was common in colonial piracy. Almost out necessity (can't be too picky about a crew under those conditions, after all).

Really, the point I am trying to make is to not try and paint pirates and piracy as some kind of historic group of free souls just out to have a good time and stick it to the man.

Oh.. Sure.. I am half-joking y'know. I know what they are in the end. But it isn't always so black and white. There is some foundation for why they get romanticized.

Chinese sailors fight pirates with molotov cockatils. (http://www.shanghaidaily.com/gallery/photo.asp?id=28289)

The Somali should hesitate to fuck around with the Chinese.  They aren't contrained by the PC niceties (such as "not killing on sight") that constrain most other world powers  :awesome_for_real:

I'm sure not all pirates are slavering raping murderous monsters. Certainly these Somali pirates, from what I've heard, are usually reasonably civil to prisoners once they're in custody. (Killing or grossly mistreating them would just be bad business at that point, after all.) But saying of the pirates of old that "they took freedom to the extreme" or whatever is just silly romanticizing. What's more, seafaring life in general tended to be a lot more multiracial than life just about anywhere else back then since NOBODY could afford to be picky about their crew.

Hell, if I recall, in the 1700's there was a black man in the Caribbean who rose to the rank of Lieutenant in the Royal Navy and commanded a sloop or some such without ever seeing England in his lifetime. He was either an ex-slave or the son of a slave. I can't recall his name and Google isn't being helpful.

Anyway, all that aside pirates are pirates and you can't put up with that shit. I'm sorry if your fisheries are fucked over and you don't have anywhere else to go, but if you're attacking cruise ships and freighters then the navy will have to sink you.

Good day: You get your share of a $3 million dollar ransom.

Bad day: You drown trying to get it back to shore.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/01/10/5-somali-pirates-drown-wi_n_156793.html

When more than half of a group of criminals perishes before they cash in, its wise to consider foul play. Apparently four other pirates that were on another boat are "missing" too. I suppose that people tracing the currency will eventually know whether it has truly been lost at sea or not.

Was there money even in the shipment?  It could be anything from bad luck to mercenaries using it as bait, but I find it hard to believe some company isn't going to extract a little retribution eventually.

Unlikely I'd say. Hiring mercenaries to take out a few indigenous pirates would probably cost half as much as the ransom itself with a greater chance of losing the cargo. They've also probably budgeted more than enough for paying ransom for cargoes and crews so I doubt there's much emotional involvement.

Yeah, I didn't even consider mercenaries, that seems unlikely. However, I certainly wouldn't put it past violent criminals to take each other out to up their shares. That's the sort of foul play I had in mind when I read that people had gone missing or perished on more than one pirate vessel.

Gah.  Fuck rescuing them.  We should just give them a number of superficial wounds and dump 'em in the ocean.  Let the sharks sort it out.

I was implying a whole host of possibilities, not just mercenaries.

Body washes up with $153,000 in its pocket (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090111/ap_on_bi_ge/piracy)

Man, why couldn't the guy wash up on MY shore?

I mean, at least I would put the money to good use....like in a casino  :drill:

Well yeah, but as we've already noted in this thread, for every corpse that washes up with 150 large on it, you have a couple of decades of radioactive, chemical and bacteriological waste washing up. But it's Somalia - if you really want a piece of the beach, you can probably buy land there relatively cheaply. Good luck with your beachcombing.

Watch out for landsharks, too.

Kind of a necro, I suppose.  But the capture of the M/V Maersk Alabama by pirates, then the crew retaking the ship, the captain being held hostage, then his three captors being boom headshooted by three SEAL snipers is going to make on helluva movie.  Can't reveal any specifics other than whats being said by the media, but having heard the inside scoop, it truly is an unbelieveable story.

Yeah, my cousin Natalie could play a plucky damsel in the film.

She's your cousin too?

So... Who's got a ship (http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0409/21245.html), and where do I sign up to join the crew?

My favorite quote from that:


Wasn't Rambo the only thing left alive when he got done? :why_so_serious:

Why am I sure he'd suggest the same kind of idea for patrolling the US / Mexico border?

Its amazing how that never gets less funny  :drill:

I always feel bad for all real cousins of Natalie Portman, who will never be able to admit that fact online.  :why_so_serious:

I went to school with one of her cousins. It was a K-12 school, she brought a Jar Jar Binks head in for her cousin's class, it was the 3rd grade or 4th grade (I was a sophomore or junior). I heard she was nice.

Hmm. Lots of civvies in small boats with guns, looking for... Other civvies in small boats with guns.

Sounds great. Perhaps we could make a game show out of it. Can we volunteer other people?

While I enjoy the humor in your version of it, if this were to happen it would enable folks to buy and arm some serious ships for doing it. A letter of mark would let folks like Blackwater find new ways to profit.

Selling drugs stolen from pirates?

See now, that's humor I can fully enjoy. :D

Yarr, my name be Master Bates of the Blackwater Raiders and I be coming door to door on this fine 4/20 afternoon to sell this here African kief which will be get and your crew three sheets to the wind.

Sadly enough this is real and not a The Onion piece. Somali pirates really love their Dutch cells.

source (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/piracy/5350183/Somali-pirates-embrace-capture-as-route-to-Europe.html)