Useless Conversation

[HaemishM]

Is he adopting middle class white guys?

[Bunk]

File this under Too Much Useless Conversation:

Ever since quitting smoking a week ago I am constipated, and have the most vile, eye-watering farts I think I've ever smelled in my life. They smell like something dead rolled around in shit and puke and then layed out in the sun for awhile. And they fucking LINGER. Seriously disgusting. I woke up Sauced last night just with the smell. 

I've been drinking spoonfuls of FiberSure to flush it all out (which is awesome since fiber causes gas, too), but I still have not had a proper elimination in a week, just little rabbit squirts. I might hafta try a colonic or something. I dunno.

Yay! That's all. 

Despite the oversharing on your gastronomical issues, I wanted to say congrats on making the effort. Even if you apparently replacing one disgusting stink that you generate with another.

[voodoolily]

It's day 10! And it's been really easy, actually. Dieting is harder than quitting smoking, I think.

[stray]

I wish it was that easy.

[Margalis]

It's easy for some people. My dad smoked for decades but quite cold turkey when my older sister was born.

As far as gastro problems has your diet changed? Or is that just a side-affect of quitting. Seems strange.

[Lantyssa]

House prescribed one cigarette a day as a laxative to one of his patients.  So it must be true!

[Ironwood]

Yes.  This is a fairly common complaint amongst Cold Turkey smokers.

Mother in Law had, er, problems of this nature unrelated to smoking.  The Doctor suggested Nic Patches.  I told her not to be so fucking stupid.

I'm nice that way.

[Yegolev]

Is there some reason he didn't prescribe a laxative?  Do they have these in Scotland?  Well, considering the food, perhaps not.

Operation Groundwater is a go.  The battle plan revolves around the tank method.  The field commander (probably me) will commandeer a truck with a ball hitch and rendez-vous with a six-hundred-gallon tank on a trailer.  The well marked on the terrain map will be used to fill the tank.  A contracted engineer suggested we let the pump rest for an hour between fillings so as to avoid overloading the motor.  Operation Groundwater is expected to last two days.

[bhodi]

Wow. you really, really want that pool. Good luck to you!

[Yegolev]

Negative.  The wife really, really wants that pool.  I don't swim.

[Rasix]

So... is this legal?

[rattran]

Until Atlanta makes well water regulated, yes it is.

On an unrelated note, I have a cold. I've been shivering all day, everything hurts, and I have a cough. Sucks to be me. 

[Selby]

I have been fighting a cold since the middle of December that just won't go away.  I was in jury duty today and kept trying not to cough too loudly and went into mini fits to avoid it.  Luckily I was in the back and judge didn't look my way.

[voodoolily]

Until Atlanta makes well water regulated, yes it is.

Well water is protected by water rights, isn't it? In Oregon, groundwater is regulated under the jurisdiction of the Department of Land Conservation and Development. You'd have to get a permit or purchase the water right from the well owner.

[Ironwood]

Major TV Campaign kicking off on Sunday.

Shitting myself.

[Salamok]

Is there some reason he didn't prescribe a laxative?  Do they have these in Scotland?  Well, considering the food, perhaps not.

Operation Groundwater is a go.  The battle plan revolves around the tank method.  The field commander (probably me) will commandeer a truck with a ball hitch and rendez-vous with a six-hundred-gallon tank on a trailer.  The well marked on the terrain map will be used to fill the tank.  A contracted engineer suggested we let the pump rest for an hour between fillings so as to avoid overloading the motor.  Operation Groundwater is expected to last two days.

That quick backflip to a previous topic really had me going, I give it a 10.  For a good minute there I thought you were organizing some gigantor scale industrial enema solution to take care of voodoolilly's problem.  Then I remembered your pool.

[Sky]

Just don't use alcohol in the enema, to tie in yet another thread! 

[voodoolily]

People who put chopped sweet pickles in tuna salad should be given a blanket party. That is all.

[Sky]

I agree. My mother used to put onions in tuna salad. That's how I learned to make tuna salad for myself (probably wouldn't have been right to beat up me mum).

[voodoolily]

No, I fucking love onions in my tuna salad. But sweet pickles are disgusting.

[WayAbvPar]

But regular pickles are ok, right? Otherwise we might have to quit being friends... 

[Moosehands]

Onions are foul and I'm pretty sure they are some sort of mind control agent globally seeded by hostile aliens.

[voodoolily]

But regular pickles are ok, right? Otherwise we might have to quit being friends... 

Dill pickles are wonderbra. I love them. I can eat a whole jar in one sitting. Especially spicy garlic dills. Yummeh!

[Sauced]

Every reason for David Banner Hulking-Out on the old show.

20.  Dealing with a pesky operator in a phone booth ("I DON'T HAVE TWENTY-FIVE
CENTS!!!")

47.  Being stuck in a cab in New York rush hour traffic - "You don't understand, I
have to be there by 4:00!" - "Hey, mac, it's rush hour, we ain't gettin' there til five,
so relax." - "BUT I HAVE TO BE THERE BY FOUR!!!"

[Ookii]

People who put chopped sweet pickles in tuna salad should be given a blanket party. That is all.

I would like to disagree with this statement, and now I have.

[WayAbvPar]

But regular pickles are ok, right? Otherwise we might have to quit being friends... 

Dill pickles are wonderbra. I love them. I can eat a whole jar in one sitting. Especially spicy garlic dills. Yummeh!

I am sorry I doubted you. You are teh bestest.

[stray]

Anyone here had minor surgery, and had the wound filled with gauze? What's the purpose behind that? Seems unnecessary, and... rather painful.

To fill you in, I had an abscess and got it lanced today... Didn't realize how much that shit was gonna hurt.. Starting biting my knuckles, even with anesthetic. The doc told me to leave the gauze in overnight, but after about 4 hours, I was bleeding everywhere. Decided to pull that thing out. Seemed like it did whatever soaking job it was gonna do at that point, and the whole idea creeps me out anyhow. How the hell am I supposed to heal with that thing in there?

[Moosehands]

I think the gauze is supposed to help prevent the wound from closing at the "top" before the "bottom" has healed, leading to yet another abscess.  Be thankful they didn't install a drain.  I had to have one of those for an abscess after wisdom teeth extraction and it was basically a couple inches of plastic drinking straw sunk into my jawline and stitched in place.

[stray]

Well how is the bottom supposed to heal when basically the walls of tissue are blocked from each other with gauze between them?

Not arguing or anything, but trying to make sense of it.

[edit] This was in my thigh by the way.. Not sure if there's a difference in the healing process compared to the mouth, but just saying.

[Lantyssa]

The flesh bubbles up from below.

[stray]

Uh, I don't understand! That sounds scary.

Fuck.... I'm tempted to just go back and get more gauze stuffed in now.

[voodoolily]

HOW THE FUCK DOES SOMEONE GET AN ABCESS IN THEY THIGH.

[Engels]

Uh, I don't understand! That sounds scary.

Fuck.... I'm tempted to just go back and get more gauze stuffed in now.

Uhm, ya.

VDL: abcess just means infection, don't it? Could be from an ingrown hair, or a spider bite, or a chigger or something else commonplace.

[voodoolily]

I know, but how can something get bad enough to warrant being stuffed with gauze (or deep enough to accomodate it)?!

/cringe

I swear, boys never take care of themselves until they're dying.

[stray]

I don't know how I got it... Started zit-like, and got worse from there. Bottom of my thigh though, like by my ass. Probably from sitting I imagine (of course, not JUST that.. but I'm sure that's the main reason). And yes, I'm a dumb boy. I hate doctors. I waited a bit too long.

Uhm, ya.

Thing is, he said to just leave it in overnight (without much conviction at that), which really wouldn't be much of an extension anyhow. 8 additional hours maybe. And he said I'd know to take it out when it started itching --- which it did. Started itching and bleeding. [edit] This isn't some serious issue where gauze needs to be removed and inserted multiple times... So if this isn't that serious of a wound, then what's big deal by removing this now? Someone give me the science here.

I'll go back if I have to though... Even though that was the most painful part. This guy was kind of weird though... As I was enduring all of this, biting my knuckles, blurting out "shit" and "fuck" a dozen times, he showed me a sample of some infected tissue while I was going through this. Thanks buddy, that sure makes me feel better!