Indiana Jones 5 - The Walking Stick of Justice

[Sir T]

http://fandom.wikia.com/articles/disney-announces-indiana-jones-5

Disney — which purchased Lucasfilm and therefore now owns Indiana Jones — announced today that Indiana Jones 5 is going into development. Steven Spielberg will be back to direct, Harrison Ford will be back as the titular archaeologist, and the film will be released on July 19, 2019.

At first, I would have groaned at this news. Ford seemed tired and uncommitted during his last go-around as Indy, but after his genuinely delightful turn as Han Solo in Star Wars: The Force Awakens, I’m a lot more optimistic. It’s also assumed that George Lucas will have very little involvement in this installment, and that’s probably not a bad thing. I have to believe he’ll at least be consulted or get some kind of producer credit, but I don’t know if his name will make it on the screenplay. Lucas has a story credit for each of the Indiana Jones movies but has never written the screenplay. He’ll obviously get a “characters by” credit, but will he at least get to pitch some ideas?

As always, it’ll be interesting to see what historic artifact or culture Indy will be involved with. There are numerous unmade Indy movies (some were repurposed into video games like Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis) so there’s no want for material. If Ford can bring that same swagger he brought in The Force Awakens, it might be reason enough to crack that whip one last time.

Confirmation - http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/disney-announces-fifth-indiana-jones-875794

*Edit* oh and for those who are snark reading challanged I want to make it clear that I made up the title.

[Kail]

one last time.

Mmhmm.   

[HaemishM]

There is literally no reason for this to exist. I do not want to see Harrison Ford hobble through this shit again, not after the last abortion of a movie. Recast it, reimagine it, whatever just not this sad pathetic grab for cash.

[Soulflame]

The last movie was pretty bad.  Ford's performance was embarrassing.  Shia TheBeef.     Lucas meddling with the script to "improve" it.  The woman from the first movie returning, doing one usefulish thing, then staring adoringly at Ford the rest of the time.  Shia TheBeef being Indy's child.  Christ.  Aliens.  The nuclear bomb proof refrigerator.  ALIENS.

At this point, I have no real desire to see another Indiana Jones movie with Ford in it  Lucas being sidelined does increase the odds of my seeing it slightly though.

[Phildo]

Only interested if this is about him fighting to avoid getting his tenure revoked.

[Soln]

Yes we need more hyper-nostalgia.     I tolerated it with the new Star Wars in hope that it will yield new stories.  I can't see that happening with this franchise.

[Evildrider]

Once again this is relevant.   

[Lucas]

I still have to gather the necessary courage needed to watch the fourth movie for the first time. Not sure I'll catch up  

[Riggswolfe]

I still have to gather the necessary courage needed to watch the fourth movie for the first time. Not sure I'll catch up  

If you have any love for the original Trilogy then don't do it. Seriously, stay away from the Crystal Skull and know that many of us envy you.

[Khaldun]

I've also never seen Crystal Skull. Have no desire to.

[Mandella]

I'm going to be the contrarian here and have some hope. Yeah, Ford has gotten old, but that's nothing a good director/writer/cast can't cure, and so far Disney has had a good eye for getting all three together, at least to my tastes.

Crystal Skull... Sigh. Look, it was no worse than Temple of Doom, and better in some parts. Nuking the fridge happens early in the story and pretty much sets the tone for all the rest of the stunts -- we're talking Loony Toons level of logic. But once you accept that......

Okay, yeah, I thought it sucked too, but I know people who liked it, so YMMV.

[Lakov_Sanite]

, but I know people who liked it, so YMMV.

We all know at least one psychopath. 

[TheWalrus]

Maybe this will be his Connery role in the series, and he passes off the whip to his kid. Who isn't the aforenamed fuckstick.

[Paelos]

Maybe this will be his Connery role in the series, and he passes off the whip to his kid. Who isn't the aforenamed fuckstick.

1 - That would be great and I would watch this.
2 - Seriously, only if his kid is recast though.
3 - And no more aliens
4 - And no more Lucas
5 - Oh and bring back the holy grail, it was lost. And now, it's back!

[Khaldun]

The major issue I can see is even if they go with "Old Indiana Jones" and have some non-progeny for his hand-off, I don't know how you keep the pulp tone and move the character forward in history. I don't think you can do a 1970s thing and have it stay within the pulp sensibility, but if you lose that sensibility, then rare artifacts and non-Western societies and geopolitical rivalries I think risk becoming markedly less fun. Or you risk having Indiana Jones end up looking more like the third-order echoes of Indiana Jones like Lara Croft and Nathan Drake--that was what setting Indiana Jones' major adventures in the Nazi era did for the series, is keep it close to pulp roots.

[Triforcer]

The major issue I can see is even if they go with "Old Indiana Jones" and have some non-progeny for his hand-off, I don't know how you keep the pulp tone and move the character forward in history. I don't think you can do a 1970s thing and have it stay within the pulp sensibility, but if you lose that sensibility, then rare artifacts and non-Western societies and geopolitical rivalries I think risk becoming markedly less fun. Or you risk having Indiana Jones end up looking more like the third-order echoes of Indiana Jones like Lara Croft and Nathan Drake--that was what setting Indiana Jones' major adventures in the Nazi era did for the series, is keep it close to pulp roots.

Why not make this Nazi-era?  It doesn't need to be a reboot but you can fudge his personal timeline a bit. 

[Khaldun]

Seems pretty tough unless they decide Crystal Skull never happened.

[TheWalrus]

But really, wouldn't that be best for everyone involved?

[Cyrrex]

Crystal Skull is kind of like the Star Wars prequels to me...it is was the execution that was the problem.  It was no more or less ridiculous than the others in the series, just terribly made.

And yeah, it was bad.  I was literally angry after watching it, and I have a notably high tolerance for bullshit in movies.

[Merusk]

Exactly that, Cyrrex. Last Crusade was on a few weeks ago and I was ripping it apart as I watched just the catacomb scene. It was executed well, though, and I was a younger man when I watched it so things change. Most notably your ability or willingness to suspend disbelief.

[Lakov_Sanite]

Can we just talk about ancient aliens for a sec? Cause aliens somehow affecting pre-historic cultures is a fucking awesome trope in adventure stories. I think crystal skull did it badly, really, really badly but let's not throw out the baby with the bathwater here.

I think the biggest sin was revealing too much and too soon.  It was full on aliens from the start when in any other story it's a reveal that happens near the end and even then it's something mysterious and not fully clear if it really was aliens.  The trope exists in many games to great effect, namely the tomb raider and drake series but tere are more and they dole it out well. 

There was so much ridiculousness in crystal skull it's easy to point out the most outlandish aspect but the entire movie was outlandish and ridiculous so of course the treatment of the extraterrestrial was equally so.  In a better movie, with better writing, aliens would be fine.

[Venkman]

All of that. It was post-WWII peak-paranoia Roswell/Red Scare period, so the theme itself made sense. It was just, ya know, all of the execution that went sideways.

I didn't hate it. But I'll never watch it again even flipping channels. Which is about the strongest indictment I can come up with 

[Mandella]

All the stuff you guys are saying is where I was trying to go with my comment, but I just couldn't word right.

The problem with Crystal Skull wasn't the nuked fridge or the space aliens or even the monkey vine swinging -- it was that every scene in the movie felt different. There was no coherent tone or plotting. It was just a mess, and I don't think it had anything to do with Ford or even LaBeouf. It was the writing and direction that was at fault.

So I'll hold out some hope that they might be able to bring Indy back for one grand last blowout.

Hey, maybe it'll be Indiana Jones in Spaaaaaaaaaacccceeeeee!

[MahrinSkel]

Indiana Jones vs. The Moon Nazis would make more sense than Crystal Skull, and probably be more fun to watch.

--Dave

[Evildrider]

They already did aliens might as well move on to Old Ones.  Indiana Jones and the Call of Cthulu.

[Goreschach]

Because that would be totally out of place in the series with flaming heart transplants and face melting boxes.

[Khaldun]

They could do a lot worse. I just don't think they're going to be able to do 70s-era bad guys really otherwise.

I suppose they could pull a Lethal Weapon and have it be set in South Africa with Indy against apartheid-era SA goons. I can actually think of a few appropriate McGuffins even, though they'd almost inevitably go for the King Solomon's Mines thing, which is not a comparison they want to invoke.

[Morat20]

All of that. It was post-WWII peak-paranoia Roswell/Red Scare period, so the theme itself made sense. It was just, ya know, all of the execution that went sideways.

I didn't hate it. But I'll never watch it again even flipping channels. Which is about the strongest indictment I can come up with 

Yeah, I could see where they were going with that. It fit right into the pulp focus of the 50s and the tensions there.....

The concept "If we push Indiana Jones forward 10 or 20 years, that's the 50s....what's the weird crap, what was the pulp comics of the time into? Oh yeah, aliens and sci-fi." That part made sense. The execution was just....terrible. Nothing hung together right.

Basically it's like they cut and replaced "religious artificial" with "alien thingy" and "Nazis" with "Russians" and threw that up on screen. No actual changes to the material, format, script, pacing, cinematography -- nothing to make it fit 50s pulp.

Even if you got rid of stupid crap like the fridge, you'd still end up there -- it'd be all wrong because it was just a superficial adaptation. Indiana Jones worked because background, plot, story, and style all fit together. But the Crystal Skull was just fighting itself, because they didn't adapt everything.

It was...lazy. They'd have been much better off, I think, finding someone who was both an Indiana Jones fan and a fan of 50s pulp sci-fi and told him "Look, we're doing 50s sci-fi now. How would Indiana Jones work in that world? But remember, it's 50s pulp -- not 40s serial. Don't just sand off the labels".

Or hell, just rebooting it with a younger actor and given Ford a cameo. Maybe you can't shoehorn Indy into that time-period -- 50s is more about scientist-adventurers, not archaeologist-adventurers.

[Lakov_Sanite]

That's an interesting take but I would disagree because I don't think they just replaced nazis with russians and religion with aliens.  If they HAD done that, kept the exact same formula and changed stuff around it would have been fine but this wasn't simply old indy with new trappings, the whole movie was a bloated mess that seemed to be trying too hard on every level.

[Abagadro]

Indy should run around punching hippies in the face and finding some lost booga-booga that would totally win the Vietnam War if those stupid Top Men would just listen to him.

[Khaldun]

Having Indy in Cambodia in the early 1970s could be edgy fun if they handled it right, but...that's nearly guaranteed to go wrong.

[Merusk]

Indy meets a young John Rambo. Hijinks ensue. 

[Venkman]

THAT would be fun. Indiana Jones 5 sets up Expendables 3 

[Merusk]

Either Harrison is shorter than I thought or Sly is wearing some bigass lifts.

[Sir T]

Ford is 5' 11". Stallone is 5' 8".