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Topic: Jupiter Ascending (Read 14103 times)
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Abagadro
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Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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Lakov_Sanite
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Posts: 7590
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lol, space elves.
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~a horrific, dark simulacrum that glares balefully at us, with evil intent.
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Abagadro
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Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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Actually a human-wolf hybrid which is either less dumb or more dumb I suppose.
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"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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Lakov_Sanite
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7590
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Did I also catch some sort of vampire vibe off the bad guy? I was wrong, space twilight is much worse.
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~a horrific, dark simulacrum that glares balefully at us, with evil intent.
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Ghambit
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5576
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If it weren't for d-bag stripper guy being in this I'd be an instant fanboy. Also, Mila Kunis?? Really? As a space princess? Fail. I just... who the fuck does the castings for these films?
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"See, the beauty of webgames is that I can play them on my phone while I'm plowing your mom." -Samwise
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Abagadro
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Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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Was apparently supposed to be Portman but she dropped out.
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"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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sickrubik
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2967
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Did I also catch some sort of vampire vibe off the bad guy? I was wrong, space twilight is much worse.
The bad dude reminded me almost perfectly of a Goa'uld from Stargate. |
beer geek.
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Nevermore
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4740
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This doesn't really look very good but I'm curious, what exactly is wrong with Mila Kunis as a space princess?
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Over and out.
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sickrubik
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Posts: 2967
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I dunno. I think she's out of this world myself.  |
beer geek.
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Cadaverine
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1655
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To quote one of the comments from io9, My Battlefield Earth sense is tingling. Still, it certainly looks pretty. |
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats.
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sickrubik
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Posts: 2967
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Saying this reminds them of Battlefield Earth is straight up cynical (insert "where are we posting again") bullshit.
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beer geek.
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42630
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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I'm not entirely sure I know what the fuck I just watched.  |
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Ironwood
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Posts: 28240
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Good. I thought it was just me.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Ghambit
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Posts: 5576
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This doesn't really look very good but I'm curious, what exactly is wrong with Mila Kunis as a space princess?
She's annoying (does she have any other voice besides the valley-girl 70's show one)? Cant act? Only that.  Movies like this need up-and-comers, not next-gen b-listers only there to make the poster look good. |
"See, the beauty of webgames is that I can play them on my phone while I'm plowing your mom." -Samwise
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Merusk
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Posts: 27449
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Pretty much, yeah.
Doesn't look entertaining to me, other than to see how quickly/ violently Sean Bean dies.
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The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Ghambit
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Posts: 5576
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... and Sean Bean doesn't make a very good "Han Solo" either
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"See, the beauty of webgames is that I can play them on my phone while I'm plowing your mom." -Samwise
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Riggswolfe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 8027
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... and Sean Bean doesn't make a very good "Han Solo" either
Don't worry. The character will die in the first 20-30 minutes. It IS Sean Bean after all. |
"We live in a country, where John Lennon takes six bullets in the chest, Yoko Ono was standing right next to him and not one fucking bullet! Explain that to me! Explain that to me, God! Explain it to me, God!" - Denis Leary summing up my feelings about the nature of the universe.
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Abagadro
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Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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Ok, this delayed/dumped film is finally coming out this weekend. I may have to see it just to witness the glorious train wreck with these influences (from AV Club review, which actually said it was decent, running against the grain of most reviewers): What’s sort of remarkable is the way the Wachowskis manage to digest all of their high- and low-brow influences into something like a cohesive worldview. These influences include, but are not limited to: Moebius; David Lynch’s Dune; entry-level critiques of capitalism; the 1980 Flash Gordon movie; Brazil, which gets both a dialogue reference (“27b-stroke-6”) and a Terry Gilliam cameo |
"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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Ghambit
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Posts: 5576
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I'm cautiously optimistic it'll be a similar situation as was with Tron. Amazing movie, deceptively deep, yet poorly reviewed/watched. It is indeed a bit of a kitchen sink movie, akin to Cloud Atlas, but there's a niche crowd in there that appreciates that. We'll see.
Either way, I'm gonna geek out this weekend on sci-fi and fantasy (7th Son).
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"See, the beauty of webgames is that I can play them on my phone while I'm plowing your mom." -Samwise
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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Do you mean the new Tron or the old Tron ?
Just want to know before I leap down your throat.
(Why, yes, I have aged.)
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Velorath
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Either way, I'm gonna geek out this weekend on sci-fi and fantasy (7th Son).
Jesus, did you lose a bet or something? |
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Merusk
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Posts: 27449
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I want to see them both, too. 7th looks dreadful but fun in a campy way and Jupiter looks like it could have potential and would be worth it just for the visuals. Ab's AV review gives me even more hope.
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The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Threash
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Posts: 9167
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7th son was also delayed for years wasn't it?
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I am the .00000001428%
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Hawkbit
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5531
Like a Klansman in the ghetto.
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The teen horror/fantasy books that 7th son are based on are totally awesome, btw. This movie looks to have nothing to do with the books in any way, it doesn't look anything like what is portrayed in the books.
The books are the The Last Apprentice in the states, The Spook's Apprentice in most other regions.
This Jupiter Ascending movie looks pretty, so I'll see it on Netflix or something. Not expecting a lot though.
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Khaldun
Terracotta Army
Posts: 15160
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I actually liked Cloud Atlas and Speed Racer in quite a few ways, against the common sentiment, so I'm willing to give the Wachowskis yet another whirl.
Most of the space operas I actually like would look pretty fucking crazy if they were filmed with any serious intent of translating them to the screen, so I'm not sure why even on SF-favoring sites a lot of folks are going "lol weird looking shit will be dumb".
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Ghambit
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5576
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Do you mean the new Tron or the old Tron ?
Just want to know before I leap down your throat.
(Why, yes, I have aged.)
New Tron. Was a much better movie than was credited... and a lot more artistic than at first glance. Like Cloud Atlas however, JA is miscast. I just cant get into the leads they chose for either of the movies. The Wachowskis have made mistakes in this arena. |
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« Last Edit: February 05, 2015, 08:08:45 PM by Ghambit »
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"See, the beauty of webgames is that I can play them on my phone while I'm plowing your mom." -Samwise
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Khaldun
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Posts: 15160
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Yeah, I think that's one of their real weak spots at times.
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Evildrider
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5521
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They showed this at Sundance and the hipster crowd sneered and scoffed through the whole movie. They couldn't even fill the theater for the showing.
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Margalis
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12335
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I can't get past Mila Kunis either. She needs the right role and I don't think this is it. I watched part of Oz: The Great and Powerful and she was awful in it.
In related news, a girl at my Whole Foods is exactly like Mila Kunis crossed with Meg from Famliy Guy. She even has Meg's hat! Her voice is also almost identical. It's really weird.
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vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
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Merusk
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Posts: 27449
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TBH Mila Kunis has been terrible in everything I've seen her in. (No, I haven't seen Black Swan. Will it change my opinion? Dunno.)
I often feel like the only reason she resonated on 70s was that she was playing herself. A whiny, manipulative teenager who gets high a lot.
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The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Evildrider
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Posts: 5521
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She was fine in Ted, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and Book of Eli (not saying it was a good movie). She definitely is better at more comedic roles though.
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lamaros
Terracotta Army
Posts: 8021
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TBH Mila Kunis has been terrible in everything I've seen her in. (No, I haven't seen Black Swan. Will it change my opinion? Dunno.)
I often feel like the only reason she resonated on 70s was that she was playing herself. A whiny, manipulative teenager who gets high a lot.
Unlikely, Black Swan is just pretty crap all round. |
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MahrinSkel
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Posts: 10857
When she crossed over, she was just a ship. But when she came back... she was bullshit!
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How can you forget American Psycho 2?
--Dave
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--Signature Unclear
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Surlyboi
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Posts: 10963
eat a bag of dicks
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Because it wasn't American Psycho I?
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Tuned in, immediately get to watch cringey Ubisoft talking head offering her deepest sympathies to the families impacted by the Orlando shooting while flanked by a man in a giraffe suit and some sort of "horrifically garish neon costumes through the ages" exhibit or something. We need to stop this fucking planet right now and sort some shit out. -Kail
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Ghambit
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Posts: 5576
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 Well played. Also, does not surprise me the Sundance crowd would snicker and sneer at a movie who's leads are essentially "Jackie" and "Magic Mike." I'll still go see it.
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"See, the beauty of webgames is that I can play them on my phone while I'm plowing your mom." -Samwise
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