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f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  PC/Console Gaming  |  But is it Fun?  |  Topic: Pikmin 2 "New Play Control" - Nintendo EAD - Wii 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
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Author Topic: Pikmin 2 "New Play Control" - Nintendo EAD - Wii  (Read 2650 times)
Azazel
Contributor
Posts: 7423


on: July 07, 2009, 08:58:49 AM

So I never played the first one, nor did I play either on the Gamecube. I did read a review of the "New Play Control" version of part 1 which suggested that part 2, with it's lack of time limits for exploring and generally fucking around would be great, and so, with this on discount-status at EBgames when I went out there to pick up my copy of the Fallout 3 DLC disc, I picked it up.

So, there's a long-winded, non-skippable exposition section. Apparently you work for some kind of Space Trucking company, and while you were fucking around in the first game the company's other employee lost a ton of money, requiring the boss to take out a loan to pay off the debt for the freight losses, which gets your spaceship respossessed. Aside from these morons never having heard of Space Insurance, I really don't care. Anyway, your character took a bottle top home for a souvenir for his kid, which turns out to be worth 100 rupees or whatever, so your boss steals it off you, packs you and the other idiot employee into the rickety leftover spaceship and sends you back off to (Earth) to get 100,000 worth of junk to repay his losses. Yeah, I didn't care, either.

Aside from the fact that you'd tell him to screw himself and jettison the moron into space before making your own fortune, you land on Earth and endure some slow, boring tutorial screens, before the game puts you in charge of Mr.Moron and asks you to get back to the other guy.

Except, well, the game controls like shit, and there is no obvious way to get back.

The first guy has like 6 Pokemons Pikimin, and it takes three of them to lift up a snail shell. Though pressing down on the d-pad which is supposed to give you control over them (according to the manual) does nothing. The Moron guy has 1 of them. In between the two groups of them there's a paper bag blocking the way, and throwing the little fuckers on top of it gives a 1/15, so I assume you have to throw 15 of them up there in order to accordion the bag down so you can keep going. Of course you have about 6-7 of them, so that's not happening. Maybe if you could throw the heavy-looking snail up there you could get through, except there's no help from the game or the manual to figure out how to do it.

So I fucked around trying different things for 5-10 minutes, before having had enough, and making the observation that if I had gotten this game as a pirated PS2 game back in the day, I'd frisbee this motherfucker aside long before this point, based on it being no fun at all. Since this is 2009, I've paid real money for an original, there's no way I'm keeping this fucking piece of shit. It goes back to EBgames for my refund, stat.

Maybe veterans of the first game, or people with lots more patience than I, or people who really care enough that they're willing to search Gamefaqs to figure out how to control a new game in it's first shitty stages might like this, but I'm not one of them. I have too many games to play and not enough time to fuck around with half-assed non-intuitive shit like this, or any other game that makes you sit through 5-10 minutes of non-interactive, non-skippable exposition/cutscenes before letting me do something fun.

As an aside, the low-rez, jaggy graphics made my eyes hurt after awhile and made me even more stabby. I can handle Wii graphics for some things, but this game is not one of them. 


In short, this game is a fucking piece of shit and needs to die in a car fire along with the designers and every fucking sycophantic Nintendo-fellating reviewer that gave it a good mark.
Now, I might go give Overlord a go...

===

Avoid.

http://azazelx.wordpress.com/ - My Miniatures and Hobby Blog.
ahoythematey
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Posts: 1729


Reply #1 on: July 07, 2009, 02:36:46 PM

That's a lot of words to explain your dislike of a game you didn't get.
Samwise
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Reply #2 on: July 07, 2009, 03:24:40 PM

That's a lot of words to explain your dislike of a game you didn't get.

Do you and duse have something worked out where if someone posts a negative writeup that's too long, you complain, and if someone posts a negative writeup that's too short, he complains?  What are your respective word limits?  Is there any overlap?

(edit) If you haven't tried Overlord, Az, I'd be curious to hear your thoughts when you do.  My impression of Overlord after playing Pikmin (this was Overlord 1 and Pikmin 1, haven't tried the sequel of either) was "hey, this is what Pikmin might be like if it was less annoying and more fun."
« Last Edit: July 07, 2009, 03:29:42 PM by Samwise »

"Note, i am not saying you're wrong because you're stupid, that would be an ad hominem argument. I am saying you're stupid because you're wrong." - Goumindong
Margalis
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Posts: 11363


Reply #3 on: July 07, 2009, 10:29:17 PM

Quote
Do you and duse have something worked out where if someone posts a negative writeup that's too long, you complain, and if someone posts a negative writeup that's too short, he complains?

I dunno, it kind of reads like a review of Super Mario Brothers from someone who didn't figure out that pressing 'A' makes you jump. WHAT A TERRIBLE GAME BLARGH, IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO PASS THE FIRST GOOMBA!!!!

vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
Prospero
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Posts: 1473


Reply #4 on: July 07, 2009, 10:47:57 PM

Yeah, if you didn't figure out how to harvest more dudes, I'd go back and try again with more dude harvesting. The second fixed all my complaints with the first, and the first was still mostly fun despite the stupid time limit.
ahoythematey
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1729


Reply #5 on: July 07, 2009, 11:09:20 PM

Well, I probably should have explained where I thought he went wrong, but then I figured it'd be more appropriate to give his review the amount of time and thought that he gave the game.  You know, it's meta.

Actually, it was the whole "sycophantic Nintendo-fellatio" thing that urged me to be a shit, because Pikmin and Pikmin 2 were not exactly Demon's Souls in their learning curve (or polish, I admit, hah!). Similar in thought to what Margalis had said, it almost seemed to me like somebody loaded the game up with a "fucking nintendo and their fucking shit-fucks" attitude and then decided after the first cutscene to not even try the actual game and instead bitch about how they can't overcome the first obstacle in the first level of a NINTENDO GAME.
Yegolev
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Reply #6 on: July 08, 2009, 07:43:22 AM

Coincidentally, we just got the original GC version.  The controls are pretty much the same, graphics are better and time limit banished.  Of course, I'm playing with a Wavebird so I can't say anything about the Wii controls.  I would assume that the tutorial wasn't scrapped in the conversion, but I found it to be very handholdy.  The only trouble is that you have to have Louie and Olimar walk to invisible triggers to have it progress, but if you just poke around your ship and the onion, you will find them.  I'll put it this way: my five-year-old son figured out how to play on his own and made it to Day 3 with only me reading the tutorial to him.  Then again, he's one of those Nintendo-fellating freaks you see in the soup-kitchen lines on holidays. Ohhhhh, I see.

Why am I homeless?  Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
"The majority of my posts, though at times somewhat sarcastic, have remained confined to rational on-topic discourse" -- GUESS WHO
"Wasn't trying to be incentive." -- Mrbloodworth
"My interpretation as a LAY PERSON was correct." -- Broughden
Azazel
Contributor
Posts: 7423


Reply #7 on: July 08, 2009, 10:22:38 AM

Well, I probably should have explained where I thought he went wrong, but then I figured it'd be more appropriate to give his review the amount of time and thought that he gave the game.  You know, it's meta.

Actually, it was the whole "sycophantic Nintendo-fellatio" thing that urged me to be a shit, because Pikmin and Pikmin 2 were not exactly Demon's Souls in their learning curve (or polish, I admit, hah!). Similar in thought to what Margalis had said, it almost seemed to me like somebody loaded the game up with a "fucking nintendo and their fucking shit-fucks" attitude and then decided after the first cutscene to not even try the actual game and instead bitch about how they can't overcome the first obstacle in the first level of a NINTENDO GAME.

Not at all. I'd heard the game was good, and I, you know, bought the fucking thing wanting to play it. Not exactly a negative attitude.  Ohhhhh, I see.

The instruction that was given by the game was to walk whatsisname over to talk to the original guy, which I did. Well, I got the second guy as far as he could go. I don't have the patience to walk the characters around their little enclosed areas in the hope that I might randomly walk over one of the apparently INVISIBLE TRIGGERS that would tell me how to progress/harvest more little guys. Well, except I did run them back and forth and around, to no avail.

I mean, I took the second guy back to the UFO in the enclosed area, beat down all of the little stars-on-sticks. Nothing. Ran the first guy around his little enclosure including the coloured area near his rocket. Nothing. In the manual. Nothing. I did mention I ran around fucking with both characters for 5-10 minutes trying everything I could figure out while trying to figure out WTF was going on from the manual. So I call that poor design. There wasn't a great deal to the tutorial though. And I was only able to harvest one Pikmin - with the second character. (after the first character got the 6-7 he starts with while they get attacked by the snail).

Also, the Wii controls are/were (to me) shitfully awkward, and the whole thing looked horribly jaggy. You lot should know as well as I do that anything released by Nintendo, whether it's good or exceedingly average gets fellated by game reviewers. Then again, of you want to apply that description to yourselves or your kids that's your own descision and problem.

Overall though, I found it both shit-looking and unfriendly, and I stand by the BiiF. I'll do Overlord shortly (It's been in the pile since last year) and I think it will be interesting to see if the game tutorials a player more effectively and with less painful and forced-exposition than this game did.


http://azazelx.wordpress.com/ - My Miniatures and Hobby Blog.
Yegolev
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Reply #8 on: July 08, 2009, 12:15:52 PM

I'm mostly just being funny.  I didn't find the tutorial to be particularly awesome.  Sounds like N fucked the conversion somehow.  I can't quite remember how the first bit goes since I wasn't playing it, unfortunately, or I'd give you a pointer since it's really a decent game.  I thought Louie had more than one pikmin but I can't recall how he got them.

About the visuals, I find that using a GC and composite video makes for some old-fashioned antialiasing. awesome, for real

Why am I homeless?  Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
"The majority of my posts, though at times somewhat sarcastic, have remained confined to rational on-topic discourse" -- GUESS WHO
"Wasn't trying to be incentive." -- Mrbloodworth
"My interpretation as a LAY PERSON was correct." -- Broughden
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