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Topic: Guys. I needed money - got a job writing about games. (NCSoft/Midway news too) (Read 114955 times)
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justdave
Terracotta Army
Posts: 462
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Nahh, he's not...Admittedly, he's the Sta-puft Marshmallow Man of cockmongery, but he's no Aaron Rayburn. |
"They started to resist with a crust that was welded with human brain and willpower."
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Velorath
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Honestly, I'd never read a Knowles review before. He is the worst writer in the history of writing.
That's far from his worst review also. Most of his reviews are twice as long and focus more on himself than the movie. And then there's his Blade 2 review... |
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Well, it's hard not to focus on knowles. Motherfucker is HUGE.
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild
"Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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tazelbain
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6603
tazelbain
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Schild, I never thought you bought in, so I guess you can't sell out. Kudos.
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"Me am play gods"
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Wow, that Blade 2 review is just. Fuck. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
It reads like a 8 year old girl's diary or the back of a yearbook. How did this tubby prick get so popular?
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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The mind rebels at the horror. |
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Wershlak
Terracotta Army
Posts: 58
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That may the stupidest thing I've ever read on the Internet.  That guy makes Grunk look like Shakespear. |
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justdave
Terracotta Army
Posts: 462
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Okay, fuck that, I take it back. Jesus.  |
"They started to resist with a crust that was welded with human brain and willpower."
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Soln
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4737
the opportunity for evil is just delicious
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That's not a review, that's a self deluding fantasy in writing.
Lest we forget, Harry Knowles auditioned for the co-chair with Ebert way back whenever. He has some social capital somehow.
Too bad SCTV is not still around. This is guy is a parody of himself. I'd love to see what John Candy or Eugene Levy could do to him.
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Margalis
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Posts: 12335
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Not only is Knowles a terrible writer and reviewer, but you have to understand how he reviews movies from guys he likes: he interviews them, he sets up a special screening at the Alamo Drafthouse, he gets all excited, he attends with all his buddies, loves it then says it's an "audience movie" and a "rocking good time" or some shit like that.
Some of the AICN guys are ok, in particular Moriarty. But Knowles is a joke.
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vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Wait. What. He's in Austin?
He's too fat for austin.
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Abelian75
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Posts: 678
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Wow, that is the craziest fucking review I have ever read.
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Merusk
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Posts: 27449
Badge Whore
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I fully expect this Clone Wars shit to suck. But if anything, Knowles hating it is a point in it's favor.
So many pathetic people on the internet just don't get that Star Wars "isn't for them" anymore. Enjoy the OT and ignore the rest, it's aimed at the kids they were supposed to have had by now. My son and nephews have loved the last 3 movies and all the other ancillary crap around it. I'm ok with that, even though I think they fell short of the mark. It's not destroying my world view, however, like it apparently is some other folks. |
The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Velorath
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Wait. What. He's in Austin?
He's too fat for austin.
Yep, he's out there. They're always doing stuff at the Alamo Draft House (most recently it looks like they had screening of Tropic Thunder there with a paintball event beforehand). |
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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I should've gone to play Paintball and aimed to blind him.
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Evildrider
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5521
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Not only is Knowles a terrible writer and reviewer, but you have to understand how he reviews movies from guys he likes: he interviews them, he sets up a special screening at the Alamo Drafthouse, he gets all excited, he attends with all his buddies, loves it then says it's an "audience movie" and a "rocking good time" or some shit like that.
Some of the AICN guys are ok, in particular Moriarty. But Knowles is a joke.
I think even the people that post alot on AICN know that Knowles is a joke. All of his reviews are retarded. Moriarty is the only one I really read reviews from and he tends to post most of the info that I go there looking for in the first place. BTW Moriarty said he liked the new Clone Wars cartoon, so it must not be too terrible. |
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Margalis
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I believe Moriarty is also a writer, I think he's the one that wrote some scripts for Masters of Horror. So he's not a retard.
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vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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So many pathetic people on the internet just don't get that Star Wars "isn't for them" anymore. Enjoy the OT and ignore the rest, it's aimed at the kids they were supposed to have had by now. My son and nephews have loved the last 3 movies and all the other ancillary crap around it. I'm ok with that, even though I think they fell short of the mark. It's not destroying my world view, however, like it apparently is some other folks. I liked the prequels well enough, but all this cartoon and television stuff I view as Lucas just shamelessly milking the cash cow. The thing is, I don't really begrudge him his milk. He's been doing it for thirty years, ever since he thought "Hey, action figures!" so it's a little hard for me to pop my monocle about it now. If this Clone Wars thing sucks ass then I'll just neglect to go see it, not fucking drown the internet in tears and kill myself. |
"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild
"Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Hm? You're telling me the Prequels weren't just shamelessly milking the cash cow? Interesting.
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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Maybe I phrased it badly, but my point is that it's ALL milking the cash cow and has been since the very beginning. The distinction I draw between the prequel movies and any of the various "side-projects" is that at least Lucas sat down with a pencil and wrote the movies. The other stuff he barely pays attention to. All those dozens and dozens of Star Wars novels that meticulously lay out what happens between and after the movies? I guarantee you he has no idea what the fuck happens in any of them and doesn't care.
It's the difference between "I will write this story that's in my head and it will make me money!" and "Hey you, write something based on my work and bring me the money! I don't care what!"
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« Last Edit: August 12, 2008, 07:22:53 PM by WindupAtheist »
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"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild
"Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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UnSub
Contributor
Posts: 8064
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I have read that review twice in my life - once to see what the fuss was about, once because I forgot I'd read it. I'M NOT MAKING THAT MISTAKE AGAIN. The amazing thing is that AICN ever became popular, especially because Knowles did a whole heap of stuff that should have seen it die (i.e. ugly, ugly formatting, horrible writing, his well-known love of payola for preferencial treatment on AICN). |
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UnSub
Contributor
Posts: 8064
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Hm? You're telling me the Prequels weren't just shamelessly milking the cash cow? Interesting.
The prequels was Lucas finishing the story he'd always wanted to tell. Unfortunately for the rest of us, the story wasn't that good. Lucas deserves all the kudos in the world for his technical contributions to film and for the original Star Wars film; however, his recent work has definitely tarnished his cinematic legacy. That he can't direct actors is probably his biggest flaw, followed by his dialogue writing skills. |
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Evildrider
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5521
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I admire Lucas in that he's able to do what he wants, how he wants. I also admire what he's done technology wise for the film industry. It's just that his story telling ability gets lost in all his tech and weird ideas.
I love the original Trilogy, and I at least like 70% of the new movies and cartoon stuff. When it comes down to it though, I'm just a SW geek. I'll still watch anything SW, read some of the books, and play the games based off it.
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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Yeah, let's make this thread about Star Wars.
That'll work.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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LC
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Posts: 908
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Lucas would be complete if he had a big money bin to swim around in like Scrooge McDuck.
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Trippy
Administrator
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How do you know he doesn't?
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Der Helm
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Posts: 4025
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"I've been done enough around here..."- Signe
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raydeen
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Posts: 1246
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I was drinking when I wrote this, so sue me if it goes astray.
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Grand Design
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1068
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"Hey you, write something based on my work and bring me the money! I don't care what!"
Ask and receive. That should be required viewing for every Star Wars fan. |
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Hutch
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1893
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Holy crap. Is that Eugene Levy? I mean, the quality's a little low, but when the shades come off, the eyebrows come out. And it sounds like John Candy narrating at the end.  |
Plant yourself like a tree
Haven't you noticed? We've been sharing our culture with you all morning.
The sun will shine on us again, brother
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Bunk
Contributor
Posts: 5828
Operating Thetan One
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I figured I'd read through the thread before chiming in and giving schild some gratz for making money and all that. Um, is there any particular reason that the whole thread took a 180 from layoffs in Austin to Harry Knowels is a retard half way through? I'm very confused.
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"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL
"I have retard strength." - Schild
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Cyrrex
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10603
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There has to be a reason? It's the Intraweb!
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"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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UnSub
Contributor
Posts: 8064
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I think it is us waiting around to see if NCsoft Austin does announce the lay offs.
Until then, "How Lucas Went Wrong With Star Wars" is an endless vein to mine.
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Gutboy Barrelhouse
Terracotta Army
Posts: 870
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I admire Lucas in that he's able to do what he wants, how he wants. I also admire what he's done technology wise for the film industry. It's just that his story telling ability gets lost in all his tech and weird ideas.
I love the original Trilogy, and I at least like 70% of the new movies and cartoon stuff. When it comes down to it though, I'm just a SW geek. I'll still watch anything SW, read some of the books, and play the games based off it.
You have just described every super rich person on the planet. |
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