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Topic: Michael Ian Black is a Very Famous Celebrity (Read 2364 times)
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voodoolily
Contributor
Posts: 5348
Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.
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I totally heart Michael Ian Black, and schild reminded me of such with his Stella post. So you should read these hilarious pieces he did for McSweeney's. WHAT I WOULD BE THINKING ABOUT IF I WERE BILLY JOEL DRIVING TOWARD A HOLIDAY PARTY WHERE I KNEW THERE WAS GOING TO BE A PIANO. BY MICHAEL IAN BLACK - - - -
I'm not doing it. I'm just not. I know I say the same thing every year, but this time I mean it—I am not playing it this year. Seriously, how many times can I possibly be expected to play that stupid song? I bet if you counted the number of times I've played it over the years, it probably adds up to, like, a jillion. I'm not even exaggerating. One jillion times. Well, not this year.
This year, I'm just going to say, "Sorry, folks, I'm only playing holiday songs tonight." Yeah, that's a good plan. That's definitely what I'm going to do, and if they don't like it, tough cookies. It'll just be tough cookies for them.
But I know exactly what'll happen. I'll sit down, play a few holiday songs, and then some drunk jerk will yell out, "'Piano Man,'" and everybody will start clapping, and I'll look like a real asshole if I don't play it.
I wonder if they'll have shrimp cocktail.
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WayAbvPar
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MIB thinks we is much funnier than he actually is. He is mildly amusing, but his smug act wears thin eventually.
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When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood
Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
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voodoolily
Contributor
Posts: 5348
Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.
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Men in Black?
Lies! He is teh funnies. And when you see him get banged by Mrs. Santa Claus wearing a strap-on, you will know my name is the lord.
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WayAbvPar
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You just think he is dreamy.
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When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood
Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
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voodoolily
Contributor
Posts: 5348
Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.
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Guilty as charged. Snide = hawt.
Seriously, though I think he reads kinda like David Sedaris, who I think is a genius.
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Pococurante
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2060
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Sedaris is the bomb. But his schtick with his family is wearing a bit thin.
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voodoolily
Contributor
Posts: 5348
Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.
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True, but his essays are good. I generally find the stories about his childhood to be the funniest, followed by when he was an adult living in NY.
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