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Topic: Red 2 (Read 1694 times)
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Sir T
Terracotta Army
Posts: 14223
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Just saw it. It was boring ass shit. They went with the trope of covering up a really thin story with as many bullets and explosions they could pack in, all of which bounced off the named characters, who could breath on an extra and he would fall over dead. Even the doddering old scientist type could stab someone dead with little apparent effort. Rather than generating excitement it just killed tension and it was too damn loud. My girlfriend fell asleep during it. Literally.
Basically avoid. Not even the genuine acting talents of the cast could save this movie, and they did try. The soundtrack was great though, I'll give it that.
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Hic sunt dracones.
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Pennilenko
Terracotta Army
Posts: 3472
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So you are saying that I would love it. All I need to be happy watching this is Bruce Willis saying cheesy one liners while plowing through extra fodder.
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"See? All of you are unique. And special. Like fucking snowflakes." -- Signe
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Surlyboi
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10966
eat a bag of dicks
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Tuned in, immediately get to watch cringey Ubisoft talking head offering her deepest sympathies to the families impacted by the Orlando shooting while flanked by a man in a giraffe suit and some sort of "horrifically garish neon costumes through the ages" exhibit or something. We need to stop this fucking planet right now and sort some shit out. -Kail
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Sir T
Terracotta Army
Posts: 14223
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So you are saying that I would love it. All I need to be happy watching this is Bruce Willis saying cheesy one liners while plowing through extra fodder.
He doesn't seem to do much "one liners" in this. Its basically a constant repetition of "don't give my girlfriend a gun!!!" But your mileage may vary of course. |
Hic sunt dracones.
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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Liam Neesons and Bruce Willy? That would be MMMMYYYYY SSSHIIIIIITTTTTTTTTT!!!!! |
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MediumHigh
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1984
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Just saw it. It was boring ass shit. They went with the trope of covering up a really thin story with as many bullets and explosions they could pack in, all of which bounced off the named characters, who could breath on an extra and he would fall over dead. Even the doddering old scientist type could stab someone dead with little apparent effort. Rather than generating excitement it just killed tension and it was too damn loud. My girlfriend fell asleep during it. Literally.
Basically avoid. Not even the genuine acting talents of the cast could save this movie, and they did try. The soundtrack was great though, I'll give it that.
I fell asleep. Like only thing keeping me up was respect for the friends next to me who where apparently falling asleep too....which made me feel less guilty about dosing off. I will say the most offensive thing about this movie, wasn't the plot, the shit action that bordered on slapstick... no... what offended me was that this movie was 2 hours and 30 minutes long. Or at least it felt that way, because I slept away at least an hour. |
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MahrinSkel
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10859
When she crossed over, she was just a ship. But when she came back... she was bullshit!
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116 minutes according to Wikipedia. Too long for an action/comedy, I think. Oh well, it wasn't something I planned on seeing in theaters, anyway.
--Dave
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--Signature Unclear
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