CAN I TRUST YOU?

[schild]

Hello Pal,

 

   I hope my email meets you well. I am in need of your assistance. My

Name is Sgt. Joey Jones. I am an American soldier serving in the

Military of the 1st Armored Division in IRAQ; we have just been posted out of

Iraq and to return in a short while, my colleague and I need your help

To transfer out the sum of Twenty Five Million U.S Dollars

 

The money which is now in the custody of a Security Company is part of

The money we seized from late Saddam Hussein but were not declared.

Right now I am in the Baghdad trying to sort out things with the Security

Company to ensure a smooth and unhindered transfer of the money to you,

Therefore be assured that the transfer is safe and risk free.

 

My colleague and I need a good partner someone we can trust to

Actualize this venture. But we are moving it through diplomatic means to your

House directly or a safe and secured location of your choice using a

Shipping company, but can we trust you? Once the funds get to you, you

Take your 40% out and keep our own 60%. Your own part of this deal is to

Find a safe place where the funds can be sent to. Our own part is

Sending it to you.

 

If you are interested I will furnish you with more details,

 

Awaiting your urgent response

 

E-mail: sgtjoeyjones@yahoo.com.cn 

Your Buddy.

Sgt. Joey Jones.

 

In God we trust

The com.cn is a nice touch.

[WindupAtheist]

I got one from the lawyer of some deceased British millionaire who wanted to give me money for some barely-explained reason.  That guy in Nigeria hasn't written in a while though.

[Rishathra]

Wasn't that the plot to Three Kings?

[Righ]

Hello JoJo. Unfortunately, I am in the Baghdad too, but if you send me an advance of $10,000 to Western Union account 1718836147 I will contact you by channels secured when I get back to States United, and have my running dog lackies of American imperialism set up the accounts we need to make this transaction happen. I assure you on the life of many toy company executives that I am most assuredly trustworthy and man of my words. Thank you for this opportunity to do businesses with you.

Cpl. Hu Jintao.

[schild]

JINTAO? JINTAO? I SAW YOU IN RUSH HOUR.

or was that juntao

it's not funny anymore

:(

[Gutboy Barrelhouse]

So it is possible to profit big time from war. Woot!

I sure hope that there is more than 25 million so more people can take advantage of this. Is there some Nigerian email database I can opt-in with so I can get in the action?

[cmlancas]

There was a big news thing on Dateline the other day about scams like this.

[Murgos]

There was a big news thing on Dateline the other day about scams like this.

The American Media catches on 10 years too late.  News at 11.

I got a fairly clever one the other day.  It wasn't the quality that was clever (e-bay scam) it was that they encoded their scam url in hex to obfuscate it, i.e. something like http://0x7F00001/ebayaccountsecurity/blahblahblah/IamStupid.aspx (resolves to local loopback 127.0.0.1).

[cmlancas]

Once the funds get to you, you

Take your 40% out and keep our own 60%. Your own part of this deal is to

Find a safe place where the funds can be sent to. Our own part is

Sending it to yo

You get to keep 100%? SCHILD WHY ARE YOU NOT GETTING TWENTY FIVE MILLION DOLLARS RIGHT NOW?//?division??

[Nebu]

[Yegolev]

"Right now I am in the Baghdad trying to sort out things"

Awesome.  I will be using that one.

[bhodi]

[Krakrok]

I posted a car on craiglist the other day. So far the only responses have been scams.

Hello,
I'm Mr David
Smith, I hail from Canada, I came across your advert and am highly
interested in Purchasing the {CAR &TRUCK } which you offer for sale. Due to the fact that its been a long time have been searching for it, Please Kindly get back to me as soon as possible with the necessary answers to the question in mind, Are you the first owner? The present condition? Your final asking price?And I will also like you to send me Pictures to enable me view   
what I intend to purchase and i will like you to know that my form of payment is through a USPS Money Order..
  I await your urgent response so that we can proceed     
further..
 Regards,
Daivd Smith.......   

Sounds Good.
I will like to proceed with payment asap and will like to handle shipment myself when you must have gotten your cash at hand.I am in no rush to pick up the car till funds are clear at the bank.As there are too many scams on internet as regards buying and selling with large bogus account.My mode of payment will be via Electronic Cashier Check drawn on US bank.(Bank Of America).You will probarbly need a business check paper to print and cash or the check today.The business check paper is sold for $20 at any stationery store,staples or at your local office supply outlet.I will add the cost of supplies to your asking price with an extra offer for accepting my mode of payment. The payment will be in excess as i will want you to contact my shipper with the excess fund for shipping the car after you must have confirmed and cashed the check.i will wait for your bank to clear the check so you can deduct your own money and send the  excess fund to the shipper via money gram Money Transfer so as to cover the cost of shipping the car from your place to it's  destinationI work with an auditing firm and will not have time to mail a check.  you can IM on this ID  XXX or call me on XXX for more information.Thanks and God Bless,you can get the posting
deleted from craiglist

There are people out there that fall for this shit. They don't even make any sense.

[Yegolev]

I couldn't fall for that scam if I wanted to.  I just don't understaaaand.

[Tale]

Wasn't that the plot to Three Kings?

I was thinking the same :)

Re people falling for these scams - there was actually an investment manager in Victoria (southeast Australia) who lost vast amounts of his investors' money to one of these scams, thinking he was about to get them an amazing return on investment. He was prosecuted last year or the year before, though I don't have a story link.

[Yegolev]

"How do you plead?"
"Crikey!"

[Tale]

"How do you plead?"
"Crikey!"

YEEEHAWWWWW HOWDY PARDNER!

BALD EAGLE

GREENBACK

BEARS IN THE WOODS

GRITS AND THE KKK

I'm going to post this sort of thing like a cunt after every mention of the United States on f13.net from now on, to clearly demonstrate my lack of any wider awareness of the world.

[Yegolev]

As long as it's funny!

I do like grits.

[Yegolev]

You made me think about this for a while today.  I am very curious about stereotypes in general, so if you have some more American ones I'd love to hear them.  Never get this stuff, most of the time, since I think people are afraid we will shoot or bomb them.

I wish I had more Australian ones, but I don't, outside of wildlife, Mad Max and Paul Hogan.

[Furiously]

You made me think about this for a while today.  I am very curious about stereotypes in general, so if you have some more American ones I'd love to hear them.  Never get this stuff, most of the time, since I think people are afraid we will shoot or bomb them.

I wish I had more Australian ones, but I don't, outside of wildlife, Mad Max and Paul Hogan.

Are there any others?

Oh wait. I have one... It's in the form of a joke...
Guy is going through customs from America to Australia. The clerk looks at him and says, "Do you have anything to declare?"
Guy says, "nope."
Clerk asks, "Do you have a criminal record or have you committed any felonies?"
Guy says, "Is that still a requirement to get in?"

[eldaec]

Sgt. Joey Jones

Nice.

Because thinking up two names is hard.

[Oban]

A couple from Montana decided to go to Canada for their holidays one summer. They drove north across the border, stopped at a dinosaur park, then continued northeast. After driving for a couple of days, they realized they were lost. They found a small city, and pulled over to ask a pedestrian for directions.
"Hey buddy, can you tell us where we are?"
The pedestrian smiled, said "Saskatoon, Saskatchewan", and went on his way.
The driver turned to his wife and said "Well, we still don't know where we are. He doesn't even speak English."