Wanted: mental mining retail specialist with flair

[Tale]

Sometimes my media job involving standard everyday news gets me down and I open my emails from recruitment websites.

Job 1: Mining and Resources Conference Content Writer
Description: CALLING IDEA GENERATORS !!!!
3.15pm: Hole digging 101

Job 2: WRITER / JOURNALIST
Description: Your first love is story-telling. You are interested in research, mental health and the web and liaising with people from all walks of life.
Are you talking to me? ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?

Job 3: Editor
Description: [Company Name] is looking for an editor to work within its men's lifestyle division.
Euphemism.

Job 4: Journalist
Description: [Company Name] is searching for an enthusiastic journalist to work across Appliance Retailer magazine and [a website for appliance retailers]
Electronic icemakers and your bottom line.

Job 6: EDITORIAL & WEBSITE CO-ORDINATOR
Description: WHAT A CHANCE! ... LEADING FITNESS & NUTRITION INDUSTRY MAGAZINES REQUIRE YOUR CREATIVE FLAIR, PASSION & KEEN EYE
Steroids make you write in capslock.

Job 8: EDITOR/WRITER FULL-TIME
a full-time in-house position has become available in the Home Design Series division for a commercially aware editor to work on the No.1 swimming pool magazine
Splish splash. Commercially aware, AKA bribe collector.

Oh look, another Iraq story.

[Sky]

So I was out last night, liasing with my fiancee....I'm going to start using that one. "What do you want to do tonight?" "I'd thought we'd spend a nice quiet night at home, liasing."

Liaser? It almost killed her!