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f13.net General Forums => E3 '05 => Topic started by: Ironwood on May 17, 2005, 02:55:34 AM



Title: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Ironwood on May 17, 2005, 02:55:34 AM
So, no link.  No-one will care.  No-one will know.

But.

My Raging Douchebag award goes to my new employee who's been with us a grand total of six weeks and has just sent me an E-mail this morning, after a days abscence yesterday, to tell me that he's fucking off to Australia.

He was here long enough to do legwork, but not long enough to get it all into order and report it.  And now someone has to do that.  On top of other work.

In his E-mail, he asks for his 'advance pay' to be sent to his account, despite the fact he doesn't even work his notice period.  I think he's in for a shock.

Douchebag.

I thank you.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Daydreamer on May 17, 2005, 04:25:39 AM
Reminds me of the day my parents got two e-mails from separate employees saying that they quit (and in a private business with 5 FT employees, thats HUGE).  E-MAILS - I mean christ people, if you are going to quit or ask for leave of absence have the spine to do it in person.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: schild on May 17, 2005, 05:40:22 AM
Kill them all.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Ironwood on May 17, 2005, 05:46:31 AM
Yup.  That's what bothers me the most.  If I was young, free and single, I might grab the same opportunity he did.

But not even having the courage to come in for a face to face 'I'm leaving' ?  And NOW he's 'sending someone to pick up his stuff' ???!

I mean, you do that shit with your ex-wife.

What.  The.  Fuck.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Signe on May 17, 2005, 05:51:00 AM
I've only ever quit two jobs in my life.  I've been sacked from all the rest.  Mostly, I've tried to stay self-employed and never had the heart to sack myself... though I've been tempted.  The shit I get up to at work is just totally unacceptable.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: MaceVanHoffen on May 17, 2005, 09:44:19 AM
Yup.  That's what bothers me the most.  If I was young, free and single, I might grab the same opportunity he did.

But not even having the courage to come in for a face to face 'I'm leaving' ?  And NOW he's 'sending someone to pick up his stuff' ???!

I mean, you do that shit with your ex-wife.

What.  The.  Fuck.

Jeez.  Never burn bridges.  Ever.

That guy could've come in, given two weeks notice or whatever is standard for your industry, and turned it into a pleasant conversation about what he was going to do in Australia.  Maybe even offer to send you souvenirs or pictures or what not.  That could've been the easiest two weeks he ever worked, too.  Instead, he chose ... poorly.

You can choose to view leaving any job as an opportunity to make friends instead of enemies.  Why more people don't get that I'll never understand.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: voodoolily on May 17, 2005, 11:26:28 AM
The last job I left (I'd been there four years), I gave them a 30-day notice and even trained my replacement. I know if I ever get burned out and want to go back to schlepping coffee, there's a job waiting for me.

You'd think the asshole could've picked up the phone, even. I'm afraid that email is rendering us cockmunches who can't stand to face the emotional reactions of actual humans.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Paelos on May 17, 2005, 12:32:22 PM
The day I find a publisher willing to give me an advance is the day I turn in my resignation to accounting. Then again, I'm not too worried about burning bridges in the business world. The more time I spend in it the more I realize I hate people.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Ironwood on May 18, 2005, 01:35:02 AM
That's not a very Christian attitude...


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Signe on May 18, 2005, 05:34:06 AM
I don't think he really is Christian. 

I do think he's really a monkey, though.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Yegolev on May 18, 2005, 06:30:13 AM
If you love Jesus, it's OK to hate people.  I think.  Someone who has read the one of the Bibles might correct me.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Ironwood on May 18, 2005, 08:09:35 AM
I don't think he really is Christian. 

I do think he's really a monkey, though.

Don't Slag Off the Ben...

He's a Lukewarm Christian.  Which, I think, means ten more minutes in the microwave.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: stray on May 18, 2005, 11:58:05 AM
My avatar is a Raging Douchebag by virtue of being MIA.

edit: Oops, just realized that this was in the wrong thread.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Paelos on May 18, 2005, 12:02:54 PM
I don't think he really is Christian. 

I do think he's really a monkey, though.

Don't Slag Off the Ben...

He's a Lukewarm Christian.  Which, I think, means ten more minutes in the microwave.

It's actually 30 more minutes at 350 reallly. And I am actually a monkey. There are a 100 iterations of myself working at a 100 typewriters to make my novel.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Furiously on May 18, 2005, 02:45:08 PM
I tried that once. The only legible thing that came out was "Cheese flavored pants" which when typed by monkeys is darn funny.

Hell, I'm giggling just saying it now.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Soln on May 19, 2005, 06:48:13 AM
Nice.  I had a guy start this past Mon and took Tues off for a "sick day".  Left a voicemail saying didn't want to come in "and cough on people".  Jury still needs to be out...


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: shiznitz on May 19, 2005, 07:59:37 AM
Nice.  I had a guy start this past Mon and took Tues off for a "sick day".  Left a voicemail saying didn't want to come in "and cough on people".  Jury still needs to be out...

Doesn't your company have a period where sick/personal/vacation days aren't allowed? At my firm, no vacation whatsoever for 6 months. If you are sick, you better have ebola.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: shiznitz on May 19, 2005, 07:59:55 AM
edit: delete button mystery...


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Yegolev on May 19, 2005, 08:07:41 AM
Nice.  I had a guy start this past Mon and took Tues off for a "sick day".  Left a voicemail saying didn't want to come in "and cough on people".  Jury still needs to be out...

Doesn't your company have a period where sick/personal/vacation days aren't allowed? At my firm, no vacation whatsoever for 6 months. If you are sick, you better have ebola.

Some places do and some don't.  My company doesn't actually have sick days, in fact.  It's all "manager's discretion".  However, if I was hired on Jan 1, I could conceivably take a vacation day on Jan 2.  It would not be smart but the policy allows it.

I think he meant that he didn't want to come in and have people smell the booze.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: voodoolily on May 19, 2005, 09:44:09 AM
My company doesn't really, either, just paid leave and comp time, and vacation for full-time, salaried employees. But we're small. One bitch I work with, who my boss really wanted to come on board, negotiated a vacation within like, three months of starting (I guess she'd been planning it before she was considering changing jobs).


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Yegolev on May 19, 2005, 09:56:30 AM
My company doesn't really, either, just paid leave and comp time, and vacation for full-time, salaried employees. But we're small. One bitch I work with, who my boss really wanted to come on board, negotiated a vacation within like, three months of starting (I guess she'd been planning it before she was considering changing jobs).

You have to account for such things when hiring.  I had a trip to Vegas planned in April and was hired in January, but my new boss knew that up front.  I'd assume this was known beforehand in your example.

Size doesn't seem to matter.  Not too many companies are larger than mine, and our benefits are ridiculous.  For example, a standard workweek is 37.5 hours, and in the summer we only work until noon on Fridays.  Ridiculous, but I'm not complaining.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: voodoolily on May 19, 2005, 09:58:14 AM
We get two bonuses a year, for no reason. And we get treated to two parties a year also. It's pretty nice But I am jealous about your half-days on Friday thing.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Yegolev on May 19, 2005, 10:06:29 AM
We get two bonuses a year, for no reason.

Hah, reserve your jealousy. =)  On the other hand, the company made up a fake holiday to fill that springtime gap.  Maybe all this time off is cutting into our bonuses.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Signe on May 19, 2005, 10:27:00 AM
My husband's company leaves early on Fridays, too.  That seems to be getting more and more common.  My sister works for a university.  They don't pay much but you can't beat them for benefits, holidays and interesting conversations.  My last long term job was in artist management.  I could have as much time off as I wanted as long as nothing was going on. (never)


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Viin on May 19, 2005, 11:56:01 AM
I work for a large company and I do get some ok bennies, but nothing stellar. The best benefit I get is when I get deployed (militarily): 4-weeks of normal pay, then, for the rest of the time, they make up the difference in my salary and what I got paid while deployed. Nothing like being double paid when you are on a 2-week or 4-week deployment.

(Going to Vegas for 2 weeks in late August, so all the money I make via the military can go towards blackjack and not dip into any of my normal pay - yah!)

However, stuff like health care, dentist, and vision plans suck - copays and monthly payments go up every year, coverages go down. And we don't get friday afternoons off. Oh, we do get discounts at a couple of places (restraunts, amusement parks, etc) in Atlanta, GA .. too bad I don't live anywhere near there.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: WayAbvPar on May 19, 2005, 12:22:01 PM
Quote
(Going to Vegas for 2 weeks in late August, so all the money I make via the military can go towards blackjack and not dip into any of my normal pay - yah!)

Learn to play poker instead. You could pay for your whole trip pretty easily.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: schild on May 19, 2005, 12:31:11 PM
Quote
(Going to Vegas for 2 weeks in late August, so all the money I make via the military can go towards blackjack and not dip into any of my normal pay - yah!)

Learn to play poker instead. You could pay for your whole trip pretty easily.

It's easier to do such a think with Blackjack. MUCH easier. Learn to guesstimate through some minor counting.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: voodoolily on May 19, 2005, 12:31:43 PM
I've had pretty good luck with Texas Hold 'Em.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Yegolev on May 19, 2005, 12:50:30 PM
Oh, we do get discounts at a couple of places (restraunts, amusement parks, etc) in Atlanta, GA .. too bad I don't live anywhere near there.

A discounted Atlanta attraction is still an Atlanta attraction.  Go Falcons!


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Viin on May 19, 2005, 02:10:10 PM
Learn to play poker instead. You could pay for your whole trip pretty easily.

I play Texas Hold 'Em too, but Blackjack has my black evil greedy heart in a vise. I'm sure I'll play both plenty.

Besides, gov'ment is paying for the trip - who cares if I lose a couple grand?  :cry:

I would like to learn how to play Roulette, but I'm too scared.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: WayAbvPar on May 19, 2005, 02:31:15 PM
Quote
I would like to learn how to play Roulette, but I'm too scared.

Did you forget your green sarcasm font? A brain-damaged chimp could play Roulette.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Strazos on May 19, 2005, 02:36:51 PM
Craps is my personal favorite, followed closely by Blackjack and Hold 'em.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Margalis on May 19, 2005, 02:41:29 PM
I would like to learn how to play Roulette, but I'm too scared.

Step 1: Bet
Step 2: Repeat step 1.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Shockeye on May 19, 2005, 02:42:10 PM
I would like to learn how to play Roulette, but I'm too scared.

Step 1: Bet
Step 2: Lose
Step 3: Repeat step 1.

All better.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Viin on May 19, 2005, 03:31:54 PM
Heh, I wasn't kidding.. the betting board has too many things on it. But I haven't really watched anyone play before so I'm sure I could pick it up.

And doesn't craps have even more stuff to bet on?

I think it's just a familiarity issue.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: sidereal on May 19, 2005, 04:15:19 PM
The Roulette board is mostly self-explanatory.  Pick a number (don't do this), pick two numbers by putting the chips on the border between them, pick four numbers by putting the chips on the corner, pick a color, pick odd/even, pick a third of the numbers in the little boxes for that, pick a column. . .  You basically just throw chips around until the croupier tells you to stop.

Roulette's actually not a bad way to spend time.  It's a sucker's game by 'real' gambler standards since there's no skill and the house edge will bleed you to death over time.  But the edge isn't huge. . if you play black/red or odd/even you'll win almost half the time (for a 1:1 payout).  If you play mostly 1:1 bets and drop a few on a number here and there you might get lucky.  Roulette wheels tend to be near the entrance, because casinos have learned that people like to bet their winnings or whatever they have left on 'one last spin' hoping to get lucky.  Casinos make a lot of money with that one.

Craps is a little more complicated, but you can pick it up in an hour.  It also usually has the smallest house edge (depending on how they wiggle the payouts) so you can play it and be slightly respectable.


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: WayAbvPar on May 19, 2005, 04:41:36 PM
I would suggest either checking out the library or buying a book about casino games, preferably one that teaches you some basic strategy. It will make a trip into the casino much less intimidating, and might even make it profitable (or at least make your money last longer). However, remember- casinos don't offer games that aren't tilted in their favor.

Poker is the only exception: you are playing against other players, not the house (they just take a percentage out of each pot).


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: Viin on May 19, 2005, 09:01:09 PM
Good idea on the book - anyone have a general casino gambling book to recommend?


Title: Re: My Raging Douchebag
Post by: WayAbvPar on May 20, 2005, 09:11:18 AM
Check out Conjelco (http://www.conjelco.com/cat.html). They have tons of gambling books; the poker books they sell are the best in the business IMHO. Haven't read the casino gaming ones, but I would expect them to be similarly good.