f13.net

The taming of Anthony Bourdain, continued, though he does manage to sneak in some of his trademark colorful language.

It's a culinary reality show/competition based on the basic gimmick of The Voice and I have to say that the gimmick itself is a nice twist. The show manages to suggest, without ever saying so too explicitly, that most other culinary competition shows are strongly skewed by what the chefs know about what they're supposed to be eating, by knowledge about the particular contestant, and so on. You can see this really strongly on Top Chef's Last Chance Kitchen, where Tom Colicchio can more or less do anything he wants in judging and make it sound like it was based on something incredibly specific, when in fact that's often rather clearly a postfacto narrative he makes up to justify something that's more intuitive. (As is often the case in grading or judged compeition.)

So I like the willingness of the panel to be shown up on TV--each of them gets some important things wrong about what they're tasting in situations where it doesn't appear to be the chef's fault (e.g., the dish is clear and well-prepared, the judges just guess wrong about what it's made from). Not that I buy it as filmed--like all reality shows, there is very clearly some manipulation going on. The panel rejects a lot of professional chefs and struggles to find an explanation when I think at least one explanation is that the producers told them, "Make sure we don't have a set of contestants who are all professional chefs". Plus they've got some people who have to have been picked for their ability to come into dramatic conflict--I think the producers have to have had a way to wink or tip the panel when there was someone up that they really wanted to see on the show.

But I can see the formula having some potential. Bourdain is 3/4 of the way to having an all-female team where there is much potential for mutual leering and sleaziness.

On the other hand, it was also edited in an unbelievably languid and dull manner. Lots of dead time and lifelessness, or just routine reality show stuff. By the end I was thinking, "If they have a bumper that tells us about the formula ONE MORE TIME, I'm giving up".

They needed to pick better judges. Anthony and Nigella Lawson are fine but nobody gives a fuck about Ludo Lefebvre and Brian Malarkey.

Malarky is clearly there to be the forgettable whitebread judge, which seems to be a requirement in these things. Nobody remembers he was on Top Chef Masters either. Ludo Lefebvre is a genuinely important innovator in the US restaurant scene, though. I thought he had a pretty distinctive personality. Lawson is as always attractive (53 for god's sake, without any gross-looking plastic work that's visible)--she's like Padma only she can actually cook and seems to have a personality that has settings beyond "bitchy" and "stoned". I don't think she's as good in an unrehearsed setting like this.

Even though I like Nigella, I didn't much like the show and turned over the channel after a short time.  Just seemed unremarkable to me.  I also don't understand the set.  Why do they put the contestants in a box?  Weird.  I've never seen "The Voice" but my sister told me it was like that only cooking instead of singing. 

This is a factual statement.  The Mrs. was interested in this show, but then upon actually watching it, she got turned off while I simply confirmed my dislike of the premise.

This. I just couldn't get interested. Bourdain has gone from being supremely interesting to mega-boring in the span of a few years to me. Nigella looks like she's lost too much weight - she looks fantastic with a few more pounds on her. I had forgotten Malarkey was even on Top Chef. Ludo is a cosmic singularity of dickishness. Boxed contestants on a stage full of shiny superfluousness is both surreal and idiotic. The show totally left me flat.

And he's  :drill: :drill: :drill: :drill: :drill: :drill: :drill: :drill:

But yes, terrible show.

Maybe someone should write a global history of celebrity chefs.  You could stuff all the dicks into their own chapter.

That's a lot of dicks.

Maybe they're teeny weeny peenies. 

My partner continues to subject me to this. Don't come near it. I suffer so you don't have to.

They finally had an actual episode after dragging out auditions for three hours. It wasn't any better and it makes even less sense than it did before. How can someone have a "team" and mentor you if they're the ones tasting and can't be in the kitchen when you're cooking? This seems like a flaw to me.

They also had Gabrielle Hamilton as guest mentor/judge and totally wasted her. I've read her book, Blood, Bones, and Butter, and she's witty and interesting and a little crazy and just none of that came out. She was just a random person without any personality running around in whites.

It's a complete waste. I keep being struck that they can't even handle the fundamental job of filming food preparation and service properly--the cameras are sweeping around looking at almost anything else. It's just a series of terrible decisions about staging, format, personalities, timing, editing--100% subamateur.

That's really my take. I feel like there's a good show in there somewhere, but the directors have done their best to kill it.

This show will not have a second season.  It's sooooo boring.  I watched for Bourdain, but it feels like he just sold out for the paycheck on this one. 

I still kind of like the show, maybe because of the interactions of the contestants, but we all know that stuff could have been created in the editing room.

(I also might be in love with Diane)

I am quite surprised about how they manage to make the actual cooking of the food such a very small part of a show about cooking. Maybe it will get better when the number of contestants has been sufficiently culled.

And the final final final (now it's really the final) decision was about as stupid as it was during "The Voice (of Germany)", what is the point of doing these blind tastings again if you know exactly which chef did what (obligatory sob story might be included) ?