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Title: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Shockeye on April 13, 2005, 12:52:59 PM Quote from: Local 6 News 20 Firefighters Needed To Remove 800-Pound Man From Home (http://www.local6.com/news/4375966/detail.html) Special Aquarium Equipment Used In Rescue POSTED: 1:30 pm EDT April 13, 2005 UPDATED: 2:43 pm EDT April 13, 2005 DUNDALK, Md. -- Firefighters used special equipment borrowed from the National Aquarium to remove an 800-pound man who has not left his home in at least two years, according to a report. About 20 firefighters reportedly worked for three hours to remove John Keitz, 38, from his home on Kavanaugh Road in Dundalk. (http://images.ibsys.com/2005/0413/4376054.jpg) Crews from the Baltimore County Fire Department were forced to remove doors from the apartment and use a sling provided by the aquarium and a truck to move John Keitz, 38, from his home on Kavanaugh Road in Dundalk. The family asked for help so he could make it to a doctor's appointment for a weight-related medical procedure, according to a report. (http://images.ibsys.com/2005/0413/4376055.jpg) Keitz is at Bayview Hospital, where he is being treated for asthma and fluid build-up. Neighbors said Kietz was involved in a similar rescue about six years ago. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Strazos on April 13, 2005, 10:04:08 PM And this is why we have crazy health insurance premiums.
Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Nazrat on April 14, 2005, 04:42:31 AM Come on. Lighten up! He only needs help from the fire department to leave his house every 6 years.
I'm just surprised that his medical visit was related to his weight. Who would have thunk it? Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Paelos on April 14, 2005, 07:37:16 AM 800 pounds? Seriously, at some point I just think how does the body cope?
Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Murgos on April 14, 2005, 07:54:27 AM Apparently, not very well. Hospital trips aren't usually a sign of good health.
Why am I explaining the inherently obvious? Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Mortriden on April 14, 2005, 07:59:48 AM Quote Why am I explaining the inherently obvious? Because your wondering how your going to fill up the remaining six hours of company time... or is that just me? Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Paelos on April 14, 2005, 08:00:29 AM Apparently, not very well. Hospital trips aren't usually a sign of good health. Why am I explaining the inherently obvious? Well obviously not, i just meant why does it keep going? I mean 38 years old and 800 pounds? I'm 23 and 190. Gaining 610 pounds in 15 years would be gaining just over 40 pounds a year. Assuming the guy weight 100 pounds at 10 years old, he's still gaining 25 pounds a year. That's uncanny. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: blackotter on April 14, 2005, 08:31:38 AM Well obviously not, i just meant why does it keep going? I mean 38 years old and 800 pounds? I'm 23 and 190. Gaining 610 pounds in 15 years would be gaining just over 40 pounds a year. Assuming the guy weight 100 pounds at 10 years old, he's still gaining 25 pounds a year. That's uncanny. Uncanny? It must be his mutant superpower...sorta like the Blob. http://www.marveldirectory.com/individuals/b/blob.htm Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: HaemishM on April 14, 2005, 09:07:59 AM I just gotta wonder that once you reach about 500 pounds, don't you realize there is a problem? And wouldn't you want to do something about it about that time?
Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Paelos on April 14, 2005, 09:14:52 AM I just gotta wonder that once you reach about 500 pounds, don't you realize there is a problem? And wouldn't you want to do something about it about that time? I would imagine at that point, walking is purely impossible. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Murgos on April 14, 2005, 09:25:01 AM What always gets me about these stories is that there has to be several people enabling him. Someone is bringing him food and doing the little things that keep him alive like removing buckets of waste and piles of cow bones with the marrow sucked out and and all the flesh and cartilage gnawed off. It probably takes more than one person to support these people, like a whole team.
Seriously, if he had to go to the grocery store once a week I bet he would never have broken 500. edited because spelling is hard and I wanted to be more graphic. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: voodoolily on April 14, 2005, 11:59:39 AM Remember the Simpsons when Bart wanted to become a fat bastard when he grew up? "Ah wash mahself with a rag on a stick."
800 muh-fuh pounds. I went from being one of those uber-metabolic teenagers who could eat like, 6000 calories a day without even being able to grow boobs to a relatively thick girl over the course of ten years. I liked to think I looked like a Valkerie with extra weight, but I didn't feel healthy. I lost 30 pounds last year (getting me back to my high school weight), but now I still have to limit myself to one meal a day because I'm too lazy to exercise and wanna eat fried chicken, cheese and biscuits with sausage gravy all the damn time. It's called discipline, people! I mean, yeah - some people are plagued with a fucked-up thyroid or whatevs but for the love of god, you don't need the 64-ozer from 7-11! Eat a fucking vegetable! My favorite bumper sticker evar is: Plants and animals die to make room for your fat ass. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Strazos on April 14, 2005, 09:36:01 PM I liked to think I looked like a Valkerie with extra weight Not to be a bitch, but I don't understand that statement at all. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: voodoolily on April 15, 2005, 09:55:03 AM Valkeries summon Vikings who die in battle off to Valhalla, the Viking heaven. They are the quintessential Teutonic goddesses, all broad shoulders and stout frames with long braids. It was a nice way to think of myself when I was thicker.
Edit: envision a female Tauren shaman with a pretty face instead of a cow's head, and you're pretty close. Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Strazos on April 15, 2005, 10:48:07 PM I wasn't aware that "thick" was part of the Valkerie formula. My Mistake.
Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: Der Helm on April 16, 2005, 12:31:00 AM I wasn't aware that "thick" was part of the Valkerie formula. My Mistake. (http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics8/paternostril-2/suzy-valkyrie.jpg)Don't thank me, I am glad I could help ... Title: Re: Here I thought firefighters should be out fighting fires. Post by: NiX on April 16, 2005, 12:44:05 PM If it makes anyone feel better I'm 5'6" and can't break 110LBS. I also manager to keep a six pack. I think it's from getting up from my desk to go to the washroom. Reps baby! REPS!
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