f13.net

I could go for a beard slap. Can't grow shit.

I can grow a beard great... I just can't grow hair on top of my head to save my life.   I'll trade you!

Yeah I've had mine going for over a month and it is just now starting to look vaguely acceptable. I don't think it will ever be very good, apparently I can only do the moustache/goatee part well.

Maybe we can do a half trade. I take thinning shears to my head every few months because it is so thick.

I can grow a great beard. Unfortunately since I was about 30 it comes in snowy white like Santa.  It makes me look ancient.

I too have a virility hedge and, now that my wife lives apart from me, I am no longer obliged to trim it regularly!

Neckbeards unite? :why_so_serious:

Hair on my head to my waist, can't grow a beard or any facial hair and haven't shaved in over 2 years.  Apprently you get one or the other in life...

I could sponsor kids in Locks of Love. Also get a pretty decent beard, if not as full as I'd want on the sides.

I have a full head of hair but can't grow a beard and have the smooth chest of an asian boy.

I have long scraggily hair now, with a nice shiny spot on top. Somewhere between Kim Mitchel and Jim Ignitowski.

My goatee took about three years to grow in to a reasonable thickness, so now it will never be removed regardless of current fashion. I try growing the rest of my beard in at playoff times, but it's usually a dismal failure.

Chest hair? I have three.

I think that's one more than me.

Really this current beard experiment is teaching me why all those pictures of ancient Celts all have big bushy mustaches but no beards. Apparently we just suck at beards.

Color yourselves lucky. I have to shave constantly and my hair grows like a fucking weed. Look like a damn mountain man in a month if I'm not careful.

I like how it looks like I created a completely random beard thread.

F13 beard challenge!  :drill:

Put me into the mountain man in a month category. If it even takes that long.

I remember as a pubescent boy fervently wishing I had a reason to shave every day. Now I am tempted to buy one of those infomercial gadgets that kills hair or whatever. Luckily I am not required to be clean shaven for work, so I shave about twice a week (face and head). If I could knock that down to once a month and not get overly hairy I would be thrilled.

Be happy it comes in uniform white.  Whenever I let mine grow, I end up with damn near every naturally occuring colour known to stylists.  Half the time it looks like i have the mange or something, patches of different colours everywhere.

Winter is coming.  I would play that game. 

I can't grow a beard worth shit! ;D

I did, however, just get another haircut that I'm donating the Locks of Love.

Clearly we should call it BEARD BOWL.

Beardcraft

<Beard Country>

I've played far too much Dragon Age 2 lately, and now I look exactly like the cover character.

You could try that.

I have some hefty regressive Saxon genetics going on and my beard starts ginger and goes through different stages of blond until it hits pure white.

nonsense... you just need more testosterone.

Somewhat funny story. At a stuck-up place I used to consult for I had a local manager talk to me about adhering to corporate culture (i.e. - my grooming habits). My problem is that I have 5'oclock shadow before lunch and I would start working 2 hours before official starting time.

... so count your blessings. As I am getting older (and my beard getting denser) I don't even consider working for a company where clean-shaven look is mandatory. Just too much hassle.

Keep an electric in the office?  :why_so_serious:


I'm only half joking  :cry:

Chase women and get laid more.  The increase in testosterone will help.

We can't stop hair...


(I am sorry)

It's so bad it's back around to hilarious.

Well groomed, Helm.  Well groomed.

This is a time thing for many. As was stated in my 30's I had very sparce chest hair and a summer beard (some over here, some over there). I am a few months from 60 now and I got hair. I got hair growing out of my nose, my ears. And body hair no problem. Top of the head forget about it. I kept some (not a lot but not a crome dome ) but that is leaving now. Its male pattern baldness. It means your a funtional male. Wear it with pride and snear at the pink metrosexuals.

Kind of wish I could grow a functional beard...unfortunately the growth isn't dense enough, the follicles are thick so it just ends up being prickly, and it doesn't really grow that long.

Also I can't really have one in my job, so there's that.

I actually looked more job-appropriate in my beard and ponytail.

Maybe you guys could do some follicular trading.   :grin:

Hair transplants sound awesome.

Someone can have the gray hair from my temples. I'm starting to look like Reed Richards at 28.

I have a beard every year from October to May. Takes me about two weeks to get it to grow in pretty thick. I have really coarse facial hair though, so it gets really bushy rather quickly. Every year it gets greyer and greyer though...

My beard hair is so straight and fine that I have a problem getting real length on it. I've been trying to grow my chin out but it all tends to curl up under before getting any real downward pointy-ness. Maybe I should get some mustache wax.

I've got more of those saxon recessives, lots of red, white and black in my beard.

The white is starting to conquer as I get older though. At least the stuff on top is staying put and brown for now.

I get the full spectrum in my beard, lots of red and blond, some black and white....much more white the last couple years. My head still sprouts the thick amazing blond mane it always has. I'd be happy with a nice pure white up top, but whatchagonnado. Being blond, I'll probably just fade to a lighter blond.

Couple years ago I convinced the fiancee to stop dyeing hers, it's a great marbled black/cool grey/white around the face. She gets shaky on it now again, because society has programmed her to buy hair dye. It's so silly, because it looks amazing.

Tell her I think that look is hot. :drillf:

Seriously though, I'm in agreement.  It's a much more interesting and pretty style than a solid color.

I turn forty in a couple months. I've been bald for the most part for a few years now and just shave my head. Those of you whinning about going grey get no sympathy from me! :drill:

And from a practical aspect, it's a lot cheaper and easier to maintain.

Shaved off the failbeard last night, back to my usual DAOC Celt look.

I get the multicolor thing too, by the time I was done the sink looked like 3 different people had shaved.

Ugh, my mother keeps trying to convince me I should start dying my hair. I don't even have that much TO dye, if you ask me. Not as much as my younger sister, certainly.  :grin:  But given it's all bright, bright white, I actually like the grey, and look forward to my entire head being that color.  :heart:  Ingmar has the weird ashy blonde hair that masks if he's got any actual grey in there.

I am also glad he shaved the failbeard, he looks much better with the goatee. Rawr.

The local radio station is having a beard contest for free ZZ Top tickets. My beard does not grow down as much as out so I would never win such a thing.

Yeah, that was the problem I had that made me kill the experiment. It was starting to look like it was going to fill in enough to cover the gaps, but then instead of going down it started curling out into kind of a fuzzy halo thing.

The goatee really suits you.

On the plus side for the experiment, it's return seems to have made her frisky.

Yeah, it's a pretty nice problem to have ;-)  My sides are starting to go very light light blond, which I'm calling "grey."  I've been tempted to dye my hair, but there's just way too much of it to get a good effective color without having to re-do it every 2-3 weeks.

I've had a few white hairs since I was 17, and as I get older I get more.  Unfortunately, there are more in my beard than anywhere else, and they have a complete immunity to dye.  They're not grey, they're stark white, if you lay them on a sheet of paper they're whiter than the paper.

Oh, and they fluoresce in UV like cotton threads.

--Dave

You could use that to be the evil uncle that scares the kids. :grin:

Yeah, this. More white every year now, especially from the last 5 or so. I've kept the goatee section for about 6+ years for the most part, occasionally growing it into a pointy form of mountain man with the chin longer, or even going "muttonchop biker" a couple of times (like this guy, but more hair and less kempt - not me, BTW)
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-W4tlqAocy3I/TlLwDWUe3UI/AAAAAAAAAfo/DRjEDMZiM-s/s200/muttonchops.jpg)

I'd shaved it back into a summer goatee but now I've decided to grow it back into a burly beard with a basically straight bottom - something like Opie from Sons of Anarchy or Mac's current look in Always Sunny. Haven't had one of those before.

If I attempt to grow a beard I look like a meth addict who's been sleeping on the streets for a couple of weeks. So I don't attempt any more.

I keep my beard trimmed pretty close.

(http://dl.dropbox.com/u/44058/beard.JPG)

If I let it grow it starts at the collar of my shirt and goes most of the ways up my cheeks.

I sport the evil Peyton Manning look.

(http://nextround.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/manning_goatee.jpg)

I have the triple forked beard going on. I can't grow much on the side of my face, it comes out thick enough on the sides of my chinbone but there's a bit between the side of my mouth and my cheeks that remains smooth and unbearded.

(http://www.antipwn.com/iain_painting.jpg)

I've actually been going for that triple fork thing lately, only with a bigger soul patch in the middle and sideburns all the way to my chin line.

I still can't be arsed to shave it every day though.

You can go as Colonel Sanders for Halloween! Or maybe Colonel Angus  :grin:

I'm clean cut with a bit of pomade up top, these days.

(http://img832.imageshack.us/img832/4073/leonardodicapriox.jpg)

(without Leo's peach fuzz)

Sky is Ricky Gervais.

My goatee/chinbeard looks a lot like this guy's.

(http://dl.dropbox.com/u/111434/me2.jpg)

Is that because it's you? ;D

Well, my stupid facial hairs can't even wait till they've slashed their way out of my skin like micro-miniature Aliens to start curling.  Shaving results in painful red welts all over my face from the ingrown hairs.  The closer the shave, the worse it gets.  So I don't shave anymore, I just weed-whack it back down to a van dyke with clippers every month or so whether it needs it or not.   :why_so_serious:

Losing the hair on top only to have it start growing like kudzu in all sorts of inconvenient and uncomfortable places as you age is one of those little annoyances that make life after 50 a royal pain (still beats the alternative though!).  Backs of my fingers and toes, stupid nostrils, and my eyebrows, arrrgh.  I have to trim my stupid eyebrows more frequently than my beard, just to keep them from curling into my eyelashes or eyes even or hanging up in my glasses.

Hair color is weird though.  Used to be brown, with a dark red beard.  Now what's left on top is salt-and-pepper with black, white and just a hint of red left in the beard.  Eyes changed color too, from plain mud brown to a distinctly greenish hazel.  Biology is downright weird sometimes, and always messy.  :oh_i_see:

I get pretty much the same thing with ingrowing facial hairs Nerfedalot. The only thing I ever found that helped was some exfoliant stuff but it made my entire face turn into a dry, flaky mess, so it was no better than putting up with the little ingrowing bastards.

You're like the 3rd person though that's said letting it grow is what's worked for them so maybe I'll have to give it another go, meth-head look or not.

Well, it's worked for me because I'm an old fart, already married with no social life, and I have a job that doesn't require contact with customers.   If any of those parameters are different for you then you're mileage may vary.  But if you're less lazy than me and aren't required to be clean shaven for work, then knocking back the beard with bare trimmers every day or two works just fine for the Don Johnson look, and for me having the Van Dyke actually makes the day-old beard on the rest of the face far less scruffy looking.

My next step will probably be to do the same with the top of my head.  I'm not about to shave it daily, way too much work! But whack it down to fuzz with the trimmers every couple weeks I might do.  If I ever get up the guts to do it, that is!   :why_so_serious:

I'm an old fart, in a stable relationship, and mostly unemployed! *Throws razors in bin*

 :why_so_serious:

So, about 10 days later (crappy pic taken on phone):


It itches like buggery, there's a weird hairless bit under my bottom lip & it makes my double chin(s) and the scar on my left cheek show up a lot. I'll leave it for a month or so and see how it goes! Oh and too late for the Movember challenge, not starting again now!