f13.net

Trailer (http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/thebookofeli/)

Fallout: The Motion Picture?  :awesome_for_real:

Yes, and it's going to be fucking awesome.

Just like "I Am Legend" was?

Up until the last 15 minutes, I still stand by loving I Am Legend.

If you weren't trying and failing to make fun of me, you would've said you hoped it didn't turn out like Doomsday.

 :why_so_serious:

No - what I would have said is that I hope it's as good as I Am Legend but with a better last 15 minutes.

That being said, the trailer didn't spark any fires under my arse. There were some pretty, well framed shots but these were interspersed with two uninspired fight scenes, some dialogue that sounds predictably trite ("Put that hand on me again and you won't get it back!" "Alright, so you want to do it the hard way." - yeah, there's only one way that scene is going to play out.) and a story that may or may not contain the words "prophecy" and "the one". It doesn't help that I don't think I've ever been overly taken with anything that The Hughes Brothers have done.  I wouldn't call their films bad just, I don't know, forgettable. From Hell was pretty but bland. Dead Presidents was interesting but dull. Menace II Society was probably their best film and showed a promise I don't think they've ever capitalized on since.

The one thing that does pique my curiosity (apart from the cast which is pretty interesting) is that it's written by Gary Whitta who used to be a games journo for a UK Amiga magazine way back when and was one of the people involved in setting up PC Gamer magazine. I was vaguely aware that he was involved with Prey and Gears of War (and Duke Nukem Forever) but hadn't realised he was doing screenplays too.

The thing about Doomsday is that it was memorable even if it was for all the wrong reasons. At the moment, my fear for this is that it will make The Postman look like a good film.

Ummm, fuck yeah. Denzel in a post-apocalyptic nightmare action movie? I'm there.

Denzel Washington is not Kevin Costner. Thoughts that form sentences like that should never take shape in your mind's eye. Ever.

It really really does look like Fallout3. I hope they have a compelling story line, or at least a hot chick in Sexy Sleepware (http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Sexy_Sleepwear)

Yeah, I really hate to stick my neck out there like this, but I agree with that statement.  I liked Doomsday, but I found I Am Legend forgettable, especially since they somehow yet again, third time going, missed the point of the title of the story.

I liked Doomsday more than I Am Legend for sure.  I'm even a big Will Smith fan, but that movie sucked balls.  Besides Doomsday had the scene where the cannibals were actually jamming out to "Good Thing" by the Fine Young Cannibals.   :awesome_for_real:

Blade + Postman.

Saw a screening of this last night.  I thought it was great.  Other people in the theater were disappointed.  It has some great action scenes, and I thought the plot was fantastic.

I'm hoping I can go see this tonight.  I mean, it's a post-apocalyptic sci-fi western with Denzel as the good guy, Gary Oldman as the bad guy, Mila Kunis as the eye candy, and the last Bible on Earth (cmon, it's obvious even from the trailers) as the MacGuffin.  Nothing about that sounds bad.

The plot doesn't really make much sense. The last Bible on Earth. Right. Out of the billions that have been made. Yeah...no, sorry - I don't buy it. I'll still watch it though. ;P

That's not the silliest part of the movie either, but I still enjoyed it.

You run out of toilet paper PDQ in post-apocalyptic society!

Fun movie.  One minor annoyance for me was that the movie is about a guy who spends his life carrying a Bible around that he supposedly knows backwards and forwards, and all he ever quotes from it are a couple of well-worn psalms.

I dunno the fact its set 30 years in the future and nobody knows what a fucking bible is seems pretty strange.

Well, if they did indeed burn all the bibles, anyone under 30 would have never seen one.  Not very many people in the movie are over 30.

Yeah, he sort of says that when all the shit hit the fan in the big meltdown event, lots of things (including bibles) as a whole were burned up, and then the masses went around rooting them out and burning them where they could find them as a scapegoat.  The fact that Eli is carting around the "last bible in america" (i doubt it is the last one on earth) was pretty easy for me to accept.  Maybe it isn't the last one, maybe there are dozens or hundreds of them out there, but finding one could be a whole other problem, what with the majority of the population not being able to read and probably using it for firestarter material or handy butt whipes or something if they did find one, or maybe they are burried under tonnes of rubble in hotels across the world.

About the only thing that bugged me about the film, was that he claimed to have been toating this bible around, heading west, for almost THIRTY FREAKING YEARS.   I mean, fuck.  If a one legged cancer patient (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terry_Fox) can run 2/3 of the way across canada in less then a year, how the hell does ANYONE manage to take 30 years to cross the states.  I bet you could crawl from one end of the country and back again and still not even come anywhere close to that amount of time.

Just saw it, liked it.


Movie was so fucking gorgeous I'll pick it up on blu-ray.

I loved when he made Zorg faces.

I couldn't believe he played the EXACT same character again.

When he did that thing near the end I was all "WHERE ARE THE STONES?"

I was really excited that Eli was going to be black jesus when he started getting shot at and shrugging it off, was pretty disappointed when the story fleshed out to just be about normal jesus.

I read a review of Sherlock Holmes where some jesus nut was fuming about this was the most satanic movie he had ever seen, and stormed off 45 minutes into it demanding that hollywood puts some sort of "WARNING: SATAN!" disclaimer on movies.  I want a jesus disclaimer.

Well going across canada in a non post apoctalyptic world were you can buy food and clean water just about every where is just a wee bit easier than moving across the country in a post apocalyptic world. Having to scavange for food/coths/drinkable water every day while avoiding canibals/gangs/bandits its a slightly tougher prospect.

Most days you are not going to be covering a whole lot of ground most days you would wind up spending most of your time trying to get the necessities to survive.

The time frame did not bother me they said it was 30 years after the flash and that he found the book after the flash after they started to emerge from their shelters so that does not mean he was walking the entire 30 years.


As for the last bible in america it may or may not be the last bible but looking at the devastated land scape even the books that people did not burn many would not last due to neglect/weather/fire due to natural causes.

Yeah, as far as he knows its the last bible, is it? who knows but it's hard enough to just find one and that's believable. I mean pre-war books still exist but they're rare enough to net 100 caps a piece.

I have read a couple of reviews that say this isn't so great.  Damn them!  I shall see it anyway.

If only he'd waited to the end of the film he could have complained that it was all about science.

What, he's Jesus? Damn, now I'm kinda spoiled. But that's okay, I'm going to watch it mostly for the visuals and atmosphere.

If it takes me years to explore all of Fallout 3, I can understand why he's taking 30 years to wander across the country. I mean, there's like miniquests and stuff!

I think it's much more apt to compare him to an Old Testament prophet, as is suggested by the title of the movie.  In fact, at no point does he or anyone make any reference to the New Testament, apart from at one point indicating the cross on the book's cover.

They already had the Old Testament

The Old Testament is where it's at. That version of Earth needed a jealous, vengeful god. Not some end of days tale with a hippie prologue.

When we saw the bookshelf at the end, my first thought was "well wtf, all the stuff he's been quoting the whole movie like he was the last guy who knew it was on the shelf already the whole time".  As far as anything he said or did in the entire movie, he might as well have been carrying around the Tanakh himself.  The book was only a Christian Bible because it would be recognizable to the audience.

Mind you, it probably wouldn't have been as fun of a movie if he'd been turning the other cheek the whole time.  (fakeedit: what schild said)

I thought it'd be cool if they reveal at the end of a movie he was carrying around a Koran the whole time.   :why_so_serious:

Dianetics and at the end he gets to meet Tom Cruise.

About the whole "walking for 30 years" bit... I know its meta and not in the movie at all, but the braille King James Bible comes in 18 volumes.  Since he was only carting around one, you could infer that he spent a great deal of time wherever he found the bible (rubble of a school for the blind?), reading and memorizing it because he couldn't possibly carry 18 volumes around in his backpack, and only started walking when it got down to the last one.  But I've been told that since that isn't in the movie, it can't have happened.

Finally got to see this on DVD the other day. I loved it. The logistical bits didn't bother me that much. You kind of have to take with a grain of salt the "only Bible left in the world" line. For all Oldman's character knows, it IS the only Bible in the world. Seeing as how his world is restricted to how far he can walk or drive, and maybe a few hundred miles beyond that from word of mouth or passing travelers, I'm sure he might actually have thought it was the last Bible in the world. Without worldwide communication and travel, the world gets very small to most people. The only complaints I had about the movie were that the last scene with Oldman in the bar was totally unnecessary - we already knew his little empire would collapse eventually based on his failure to get a Bible he could read, we didn't need to see it. The fact that Kunis and Denzel made it to San Fran on whatever gas was in the car when Oldman turned back from fear of running out of gas was a bit of a stretch, but acceptable. The action set piece in the cannibal's house was fucking fantastic though, well worth watching the whole movie just for that.

Watched this last night. The way I justified this issue is that the guy was a holy vessel.  He was only carrying the first few books of the Bible with him but when he got to where he was supposed to be, God delivered it all through him.   I did not figure him as blind until I was "supposed" to, but then thinking back to a few early scenes I liked how it was hinted. 

I think if you're trying to figure out how he fit a Braille bible in one volume you're thinking about it too hard.  Figure that the moviegoing public and probably the scriptwriters do not know much about Braille and have no reason to suspect that a Braille book would need to be 18 times the size of a normally printed book.  And then tell yourself "a wizard did it".

But if you really want a scientific explanation, how's this: with a decent compression algorithm you can probably squish the text in a Bible down to 1/18th of its original size, data-wise.  So say it's not just a Braille bible, but a gzip'd Braille Bible, and Eli is a mathematical savant who can uncompress it in his head.

It was an ultra evangelical's right-wing bible.  It didn't need all that hippy-dippy love-thy-neighbor crap, the psalms and things that contradict itself.  Duh.  :awesome_for_real:

Watched this over the weekend finally. Fight scenes were best bit of it - and I did like the farmhouse stand off with Dumbledore and his missus even if it was a pretentious bit of "Hey, I know, let's make it seem like we did it in one take!"  There were several shots which just reeked of "Look at us! We're being really clever!" which pulled me out of it a bit.

Unfortunately, the rest of it was dull as ditchwater and the whole "voices in my head" thing really didn't work for me. Nor did the twist at the end. Gary Oldman made the best of a poorly written part.

I also shouldn't have watched this the night after seeing "The Road".

Oh man, that was Dumbledore? I totally forgot he was in that movie. Awesome!