|
Title: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Sir T on July 10, 2009, 11:10:58 PM Wraeththu: From Enchantment to Fulfillment
http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14347.phtml Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: justdave on July 10, 2009, 11:17:48 PM So Besides the Penis, What Else is Going On?
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Tarami on July 11, 2009, 12:38:52 AM Quote You can now bring in elements such as pelki (killing humans with the Wraeththu sexual organ) :ye_gods: Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: UnSub on July 11, 2009, 10:43:42 AM Quote “Okay, so it’s the near future, right? And the humans have totally screwed up the world, so there’s these new Wray-thoo things that are slowly taking over. And these Wray-thoo all look like boys, see, ‘cause they used to be guys, but now they’re hermaphrodites, and they’re all willowy, but they can do magic and they spend all their time hunting down humans and forcibly turning them into Wray-thoo when they’re not drinking beer or getting stoned. Oh, and it uses a new system, so you’ll have to learn it. Plus, everybody in the group has to have sex with each other or they’ll die. In the game, I mean. Also, everybody’s character doesn’t have a dick anymore.” :awesome_for_real: Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Soln on July 11, 2009, 01:11:36 PM this is like something Tycho would make up. I can't believe this stuff exists.
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: schild on July 11, 2009, 01:48:55 PM I just looked for this stuff at Half-Price Books. No dice :(
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Stormwaltz on July 11, 2009, 05:06:03 PM Oh yeah. That reviewer is awesome.
His latest is a review of Twilight: 2013 (http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14150.phtml), a post-apocalyptic RPG. Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Sheepherder on July 11, 2009, 10:51:37 PM Quote “Phone up your friend and sex-talk him into an orgasm while pretending to be a hermaphroditic bishonen! Then shoot him in the eye with a BB gun that you thought was unloaded! Oh, and later, once you’re all finished bleeding from your eyesockets and have fully gotten used to describing your flower-penis fantasy to your friend, you get to role-play raping a human and ejaculating acid into his colon!" Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: dusematic on July 12, 2009, 12:18:13 AM Read half the review. Intensely and hauntingly true.
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: TheWalrus on July 12, 2009, 12:31:51 AM I'm hoping it's not just cause it's late, but this line struck me so goddamn funny from the Twilight 2013 review...
"France shoots back at Russia, a formula for the instant nuclear annhilation of all of your croissants" Completely giggleworthy. "China, meanwhile, is busy invading Taiwan, Japan, Myanmar, the Phillipines and Korea at the same time, following Clausewitz's doctrine that the best way to make war is to open twenty-six simultaneous fronts at the same time. I think that he wrote it in his seminal treatise "Me Clausewitz BA-CHOMP BA-CHUY-CHUY CHOMP" Fuck, can't breathe...This guys great. Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Arnold on July 12, 2009, 12:40:12 AM If I play a Wraiththu, do I get to learn Wraiththu-fu???
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Bzalthek on July 12, 2009, 12:53:57 AM No, you just get your testicles removed. I mean, if you play that game you apparently will never need them again.
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Arnold on July 12, 2009, 12:59:25 AM But if I get something cool and magical, like the force, in return, I don't need testosterone, right???
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Bzalthek on July 12, 2009, 01:01:08 AM You're right, twinkletoes. Go find those pruning shears.
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Ingmar on July 13, 2009, 11:41:27 AM That sounds pretty bad but I don't know if it really is worse than F.A.T.A.L. It definitely has a funnier review, though.
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: HaemishM on July 13, 2009, 12:51:00 PM Genius review. Worth all the time it took to read that many words.
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Rendakor on July 14, 2009, 11:13:19 AM Quote You’re basically an androgynous soul-rapist. Yay! Wow. That review is awesome. Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: JWIV on July 14, 2009, 11:19:14 AM Cut for flower penis
Title: Re: The longest review of (probably) the worst roleplaying game ever made Post by: Sir T on July 14, 2009, 02:33:48 PM Isthataflowerpenis??? :ye_gods:
|