f13.net

Cookbook for the adventurous hostess (http://www.lulu.com/content/4956212)  :ye_gods:

The comments are priceless.  I can't believe any of them are serious, but damn are they amusing.

Also.. i learned something today.  There's crazier people than Vegans: Those who follow fruitarianism and believe it's even wrong to eat plants, because they're living things too.  :uhrr:

Shoot, I think it finally happened. Ive seen it all. Thank you internet.

(http://dl-client.getdropbox.com/u/99701/tv-head.jpg)

Holy fuck, I'm crying. Those comments are priceless.

Hypocrits!  Eating the fruit kills hundreds of unborn plants.  It's vegibortion!

Fruits are meant to be eaten, it's the plant's means of seed dispersal.

Except people don't eat the seeds and then shit in their front yard.

Well, I do, but most people don't.

I would hope it makes it to amazon so the suggested purchases can recommend a cookbook splashguard (http://www.amazon.com/Cookbook-Stand-Alder-Wood-Acrylic-Splash-Guard/dp/B0000V0DII).

Wild animals shit in your bathroom?

What?

My point was that a lot of seeds are transported by riding in an animals digestive tract, until they are "deposited" on the ground somewhere. People on the other hand either pick the seeds/pits out and throw them somewhere they wont grow, or shit them out in a toilet.

Sorry if I'm being dense.

It's been said multiple times. But whatever. Those comments are fucking hilarious.

Way to ruin the funny by being so serious about people who only eat fruit because plants are alive.  :cry:

Technically eating fruit is wrong because you shit the seeds down the toilet.

Edit: Oh, sorry. Someone already said that.

Anyway, point being. If you think about it too much, the only thing you can do as a human that'll truly leave yourself in positive standing going forward with the earth is to off yourself.

Let's remember the good times:

That's okay though cause we systematically grow them for their fruit. I.e. of the plant species that we eat the fruit of, their "biomass" is much larger than if they were not cultivated by us.

After reading some of those comments I implore you to start with others first.

As such killing cows would be okay, because far more cows exist now than would naturally through our industrial production needed for mass consumption. Nevermind that they live tortured, unnatural lives are are pumped full of drugs before being slaughtered so their spinal cords are turned into gelatin snacks.

Now, consider aliens doing the same to humans. Or, like, watch The Matrix, dude.

Better yet, The Animatrix.

But get good and high first for full effect!

It's more like breeding cows for their milk.

1) How can this not be Serious Business?

2) What kind of rating system is it were something can be rated one star and 4 halves?

So I was laughing so much at this that I woke my girlfriend up. Breakfast time!  :drill:

:ye_gods:

Well, you're also only breeding humans for their electricity.

Plus, they get to hang out with the Woman In The Red Dress in the Matrix - so it's very humane.

What's the equivalent of that for cows?

Wow, I thought pearl sauce was only added when food was sent back to the kitchen due to an error.

Learn something new everyday.

For real. I'm taking a vacation now.

At first I was like, "Ha Ha I have a dirty mind can't be that!"
Then I was like, "Oh see, it's a cookbook site.."
and then finally I was like, "I FUCKING KNEW IT!"

I  :heart: interwebs.

DERNIT AHM JES TRYIN TA SHIT IN MAH FRONT YARD EN THERE'S THAT DERN PURPLE BACKGROUND AGIN!

This is such a fucking gem of a post.  Bravo sir.

This.

+  :ye_gods:

My thought process exactly.  :grin:

I figure VDL would have posted to either say if the recipes were worthwhile or not. :pedobear:

For anything more than a tablespoon or two, you got to be friggin (literally) Peter North (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_North_(porn_star))~!!!!!

Or does the book recommend mixing from various sources or refrigeration of multiple shots?  :ye_gods:  :ye_gods:  :ye_gods:  :uhrr:

I would have thought that storage of semen without significantly affecting it's consistency and possibly taste would be very difficult. Semen clots and then un-clots soon after ejaculation and both of those processes would change it's properties as far as cooking with it were concerned.

The best solution would probably be similar to the methods used for preserving it for artificial insemination, i.e. storage in the vapour phase above liquid nitrogen, but unless thawing was very tightly controlled there would be a lot of protein degradation. Plus sterility would be very difficult to ensure and I seriously doubt that mouldy semen would be good for culinary purposes.

As an aside, while refreshing my memory of the composition of semen I discovered the following, frankly amazing, factoid:

"When the British Secret Intelligence Service (SSB) discovered that semen made a good invisible ink, Sir George Mansfield Smith-Cumming noted of his agents that "Every man carries his own stylo"."

I  :heart: the internet.

Smith-Cumming you say? Indeed.

Hey, it was on Wikipedia, it *must* be true!