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I can't tell if this article is a joke or not.

Is English your native tongue?

I can't tell if this article is a joke or not.

The Bard's Tale is a highly original game in the same category as a Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, Half-Life 2 and Halo 2

No, I speak Bocce, why do you ask?

You speak Italian lawn bowling?

You speak Italian lawn bowling?

Bocce is the language 3p0 is asked if he speaks in the first Star Wars movie.

7. Star Wars
Public Humiliation: 82.1%
Before the lame-ass new Star Wars movies, we might have let it go if we saw a Lando Calrissian or an Ewok waiting in line for a movie. Not anymore. Anyone disguised as a Jedi in this day and age had better have been helped into that costume by a caregiver assigned by the state to assist their special needs. Related Trivia Fact: Admiral Ackbar is the guy with the fish head from Return of the Jedi that screams things like, “Shorshenblorg borshchortle!”
Damage to Sex Life: 54.6%
Dressing like Darth Vader creates a number of sexual obstacles. First you have to find someone who doesn’t mind dating the dark lord of geeks, and from this point on the sentence is moot since you won’t, and then they have to safely be able to dig their way through your codpiece of cybernetic space enhancements. Impossible. Plus, the speech that Darth Vader gave to Natalie Portman in Episode II (about how she was so great because she wasn’t like sand) is going to hang over the heads of evil single Jedi for generations. On the other hand, the strict moral code of the good Jedi prevents them from touching naked women with anything other than a light saber. And that, of course, would kill them. On the third hand, I have this theory I’ve been meaning to test that jumping into a room naked and screaming like Chewbacca would be super erotic. Keep in mind, however, that my last theory, “Wouldn’t it be sweet if these were like, FLYING condoms?” went largely ignored by the sex community.

Distinguishing Characteristics: Overweight, casually strolling into the center of the room, and then when you least expect it, bursting into a blinding Jedi combat storm with a golf ball retriever.

I only have 1 and it's collectibe card games, and only on the net.

5. Collectible Card Games
Public Humiliation: 96.8%
Damage to Sex Life: 89.3%

Thanks, Riggs... although, I have no idea why someone would ask a robot if he speaks Italian lawn bowling.  I guess I just don't get science fiction stuff.

You speak Italian lawn bowling?

Is bocce necessarily the same as boccia (http://www.bocciainternational.com/)?

Not quite the same as collecting the paper cards, going to shops to play and having binders full of them. I can keep it a dirty little secret.

At least the guys with the paper cards have to go outside.

Somehow I doubt George Lucas knew that Bocce actually meant something.

Pirated or unauthorized playable game code would not actually be made available over the internet intentionally, but would somehow leak out. But the full version of the game could be attained by game enthusiasts at major retail outlets as early as October 26th 2004, or October 19th online for those brave enough to risk a virus in the search for warez.

Yes, and show the world they are playing with little pieces of cardboard. MtGO is at least closer to something like Counterstrike than Pokemon, the collectible card game.

The Bard's Tale has some genuinely good ideas, but much of its execution falls short. The funny stuff isn't as funny as it needs to be, and at its apex it's just kind of amusing. The straight high-fantasy stuff it employs is actually pretty good, and the game might've even been better if it had played it straight all the way through. The core hack-and-slash stuff is solid, and the changes it makes to the genre's formula, though not entirely successful, do help give the game a bit of its own personality. It's certainly not an out-and-out failure, but in light of the legacy created by its namesake and the previous landmarks in the genre, The Bard's Tale is a disappointment.