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f13.net General Forums => Serious Business => Topic started by: angry.bob on January 03, 2008, 09:33:38 AM



Title: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: angry.bob on January 03, 2008, 09:33:38 AM
Would someone from Lancaster legitimately talk like John Rhys-Davies as Gimli, or is it likely a put-on?

Also, is calling someone a "fecking muppet" some sort of commonly used insult? Because if it is it's really dumb and you guys need better insults.

I thank you in advance for your answers.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Mrbloodworth on January 03, 2008, 09:37:20 AM
you doing some traveling or something?


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Oban on January 03, 2008, 09:39:57 AM
Also, is calling someone a "fecking muppet" some sort of commonly used insult? Because if it is it's really dumb and you guys need better insults.

I have heard muppetfecker before, but that was in Ireland.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ookii on January 03, 2008, 09:44:22 AM
Would someone from Lancaster legitimately talk like John Rhys-Davies as Gimli, or is it likely a put-on?

If this question somehow vaguely insults John Rhys-Davies it's on like Donkey Kong.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: IainC on January 03, 2008, 09:51:30 AM
Fecking muppet is a legitimate term of endearment. I have been accused of it on multiple occasions. You Americans are so uptight with your insults, you restrict yourselves to one tiny corner of the language when you have the whole glorious cloth to choose from.

Pick any two words that are or sound vaguely dirty and lump them together for instant gratification:
Nobjockey
Arsegobbler
Flobwrangler
Etc.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: HaemishM on January 03, 2008, 09:53:27 AM
I always equated calling someone a muppet with calling them a retard.

Context gleaned from Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 03, 2008, 10:30:59 AM
Yes, to both your questions.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ookii on January 03, 2008, 10:54:00 AM
Also, is calling someone a "fecking muppet" some sort of commonly used insult? Because if it is it's really dumb and you guys need better insults.

Maybe, but they have the best slang in the goddamn world:

Porkies = pork pies = lies
Apples = apples and pears = stairs
Barnet = Barnet Fair = hair
Brass = Brass Flute = Prostitute
Dog = dog and bone = telephone
Jam = Jam jar = Car
Water = Water bottle = throttle
China = China plate = mate
Pony = pony and trap = crap (to defecate)
Saucepan = Saucepan Lid = Kid
Frog = frog and toad = road
Rosie = Rosie Lee = tea/gypsy
J. Arthur = J. Arthur Rank = bank
Trouble = trouble and strife = wife

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cockney_rhyming_slang (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cockney_rhyming_slang)


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Mrbloodworth on January 03, 2008, 11:02:31 AM
I always equated calling someone a muppet with calling them a retard.

Context gleaned from Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.

Really? I thought it meant "Easily manipulated with hand in ass", or something.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ookii on January 03, 2008, 11:08:11 AM
Sorry I'm in an informative posting mood today.

If you're as bored as I am you might want to read:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muppet_(slang) (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muppet_(slang))

Wikipedia knows all.

PS: Did you know the slang for 'muppet' was used in CoD4?


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: WayAbvPar on January 03, 2008, 11:36:40 AM
Also, is calling someone a "fecking muppet" some sort of commonly used insult? Because if it is it's really dumb and you guys need better insults.

Maybe, but they have the best slang in the goddamn world:

Porkies = pork pies = lies
Apples = apples and pears = stairs
Barnet = Barnet Fair = hair
Brass = Brass Flute = Prostitute
Dog = dog and bone = telephone
Jam = Jam jar = Car
Water = Water bottle = throttle
China = China plate = mate
Pony = pony and trap = crap (to defecate)
Saucepan = Saucepan Lid = Kid
Frog = frog and toad = road
Rosie = Rosie Lee = tea/gypsy
J. Arthur = J. Arthur Rank = bank
Trouble = trouble and strife = wife

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cockney_rhyming_slang (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cockney_rhyming_slang)

Cockney rhyming slang is about on par with 1337-speak as far as I am concerned. Both give me a splitting headache and make me want to slap the shit out of the user.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 03, 2008, 11:40:49 AM
It's also a bit wide of the mark to call 'cockney' slang a 'UK' thing.

It's a little bit more, er, centralised than that.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Signe on January 03, 2008, 01:01:19 PM
I suck at most slang and get it all wrong.  Righ's taught me a lot of strange phrases but around here it's no' worth a tinker's curse.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Sky on January 03, 2008, 01:45:22 PM
We've got to stop watching BBC and british comedy in general. Waaay too much slipping into daily conversation. It does make it funny, though. I used 'fiddly bits' and after the Extras finale (boo) I can't make the 'ok' hand gesture without thinking 'wanker!'.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ookii on January 03, 2008, 01:51:28 PM
We've got to stop watching BBC and british comedy in general. Waaay too much slipping into daily conversation. It does make it funny, though. I used 'fiddly bits' and after the Extras finale (boo) I can't make the 'ok' hand gesture without thinking 'wanker!'.

I know what you mean, I can't say 'vacation' anymore, it's starting to come out as 'holiday' most of the time.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Lantyssa on January 03, 2008, 03:11:03 PM
I suck at most slang and get it all wrong.  Righ's taught me a lot of strange phrases but around here it's no' worth a tinker's curse.
How apropos.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Triforcer on January 03, 2008, 09:16:08 PM
"Cack knacker" is my favorite British phrase.  And if it doesn't exist, it should.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 04, 2008, 02:08:15 AM
That sounds more like someone Irish using Cocknocker, to be honest.  Which is a phrase in much use among the Celts.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Arthur_Parker on January 04, 2008, 03:40:39 AM
I was going to complain that the thread title is wrong and I'm a British Subject, and not a UK Citizen.  But it turns out, they killed me off as a British Subject (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_subject) in 1983, so now I'm feeling a bit depressed.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 04, 2008, 03:45:37 AM
At least they didn't, you know, actually kill you off.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Arthur_Parker on January 04, 2008, 03:51:41 AM
True, on the subject of slang.  I'm quite fond of "I'm touching cloth" so  "off to drop the kids off at the pool".


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: NowhereMan on January 04, 2008, 04:15:12 AM
On a note of trivia, for the last few years British subjects have required visas to get into the states as my mum discovered at the Heathrow boarding gate 20 minutes before departure with her British passport. It has since been changed for an Irish one.

The nice American woman in the embassy when told about this replied with, "Oh that rule wasn't meant for you." Since apparently the Americans had a problem with Indians on British passports or something.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Righ on January 04, 2008, 08:19:21 AM
Pick any two words that are or sound vaguely dirty and lump them together for instant gratification:
Nobjockey
Arsegobbler
Flobwrangler

Jackhob


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Teleku on January 04, 2008, 08:43:32 AM
Those are quite similar to American insults such as cock jocky or nob gobbler.....  We do the exact same thing, we just actually like to make our insults vulgar instead of just....strange. ;)

In kind of parallel to Sky's post, I was around quite a number of UK citizens while living in Japan (both studying with and just meeting in bars).  My usage of the word Cunt has sky rocketed inadvertently, and I've had to make alot of effort to bring that back under control now that I'm in the US again.  I'm pretty sure Cunt is just about the worst word we have (fuck as become so popular it's moved down a bit, getting desensitized).  Accidentaly letting that one slip in public gets you alot of stares, and calling a girl that is grounds for instant extreme violence.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Sky on January 04, 2008, 09:11:24 AM
I'm happy to no longer travel in circles that are desensitized to 'fuck'. It's refreshing.

However, for the desensitized folks, just get creative. Instead of cunt, use 'cunt full of runny shit'.

On second thought....don't. Words don't bug me and I enjoy the creative usages, even if it's considered 'vulgar'. But apparently most people have serious word hangups. The only word hangup I can think of personally is about the word 'hate'. Also, lately I've been bothered by the misappropriation of 'discriminating'.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Polysorbate80 on January 04, 2008, 09:16:45 AM
Accidentaly letting that one slip in public gets you alot of stares, and calling a girl that is grounds for instant extreme violence.

My wife has always been vehemently opposed to using the word "cunt" for anything, but a couple months ago I let "cunt punt" slip out in conversation around her.  She just blinked a couple of times and actually smirked slightly.  Perhaps I overloaded her poor grey matter?


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Signe on January 04, 2008, 09:22:56 AM
I don't understand how cunt is any worse than cock or why insulting a woman is any worse than insulting a man.  Or better.  Or whatnot.  Anyway, neither of them sound as nasty as jackhob.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Teleku on January 04, 2008, 09:36:50 AM
Eh, just a cultural thing.  The British throw that word around like nothing, but it's remained an incredibly vulgar word in the US, and hasn't been desensitized as much as fuck and most other cuss words.  On why its' worst to say to a girl, err, I guess just think of it in terms the N word (which I wont even type if I can help it).  If a white guy calls a black guy the N word, its probably the single worst insult that can possibly be thrown at that man (and most likely to cause violence).  But if a white guy calls another white guy that, it doesn't really have the same effect, heh.

And yes, Jackhob sounds like a very dirty word.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Yegolev on January 04, 2008, 11:45:56 AM
I don't understand how cunt is any worse than cock or why insulting a woman is any worse than insulting a man.

Never been in a relationship with a woman.  It's understandable.  Women are cunts.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: angry.bob on January 04, 2008, 12:22:01 PM
you doing some traveling or something?

No, it's actually for the nerdiest of reasons: Roleplaying.

While I find accents of all types extremely interesting and love to hear them, nothing grates on my nerves worse than someone deciding their character is Scottish and insisting on doing a stereotypical Scottish accent everytime they say something. Especially when they're not all that good at it, and the place they were supposed to be born and raised in isn't Scotland. I was really hoping the answer to those questions was "no" since Lancaster doesn't appear to be anywhere close to Scotland and I could tell him to stop it. "Arrrrl, ge' yer heed dewn, Ia'll net be poolin ye te covaaar if'n ye git shut, ye feckin' muppet!". Usually followed by a rambling childhood story about throwing rocks at trains. Holy fucking god. It's like listeneing to Begbie after is tongue was filled with novacaine.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Signe on January 04, 2008, 12:35:29 PM
I am completely confused.  (http://www.invision.smileyville.net/smilies/conf%20(8).gif)


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Slayerik on January 04, 2008, 12:42:19 PM
Me too Signe.

I'm guessing it is some sort of RPG or it could be man love. A coin toss at this point ;)


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Lantyssa on January 04, 2008, 01:07:13 PM
Bedtop RGP game?  I sense a new geek market.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: HaemishM on January 04, 2008, 01:28:27 PM
Bedtop RGP game?  I sense a new geek market.

Only if it's solo-friendly.  :rimshot:


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: K9 on January 04, 2008, 01:53:03 PM
...


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Lantyssa on January 04, 2008, 04:57:34 PM
I'm a failure as an entrepreneur. :sad_red_panda:


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 05, 2008, 03:04:42 AM
you doing some traveling or something?

No, it's actually for the nerdiest of reasons: Roleplaying.

While I find accents of all types extremely interesting and love to hear them, nothing grates on my nerves worse than someone deciding their character is Scottish and insisting on doing a stereotypical Scottish accent everytime they say something. Especially when they're not all that good at it, and the place they were supposed to be born and raised in isn't Scotland. I was really hoping the answer to those questions was "no" since Lancaster doesn't appear to be anywhere close to Scotland and I could tell him to stop it. "Arrrrl, ge' yer heed dewn, Ia'll net be poolin ye te covaaar if'n ye git shut, ye feckin' muppet!". Usually followed by a rambling childhood story about throwing rocks at trains. Holy fucking god. It's like listeneing to Begbie after is tongue was filled with novacaine.


Gimli in the movies wasn't doing a Scottish Accent.  Sorry, you got that wrong.


Actually :  Edited to Add :  Your whole post has messed with my head and fucked me right off.  Go and get your RP friend and punch him in his stupid fucking face for me.  Lancaster is nowhere fucking near and the Lancashire accent is totally different with many many unique features.  Seriously, right in his face.  PUNCH.

Then kick him in the balls and scream 'That's for Ironwood you Pretentious and ignorant little fuck'.

Also, Muppet isn't Scottish AT ALL.  FUCKING TELL THAT ASSHOLE TO SHUT HIS FUCKING STUPID FACE BEFORE I COME OVER THEN AND GELDON HIM BY BREAKING ALL HIS FUCKING FINGERS.

Assholes.



Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: NowhereMan on January 05, 2008, 03:14:37 AM
He sounds like a complete muppet.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Signe on January 05, 2008, 05:16:49 AM
I used to throw rocks at trains.  No in Britain, though.  They take their trains very seriously there.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Azazel on January 05, 2008, 05:35:03 AM
Assholes.

Spell it right.

Arseholes.




Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: DraconianOne on January 07, 2008, 04:47:45 AM

Gimli in the movies wasn't doing a Scottish Accent.  Sorry, you got that wrong.

Actually :  Edited to Add :  Your whole post has messed with my head and fucked me right off.  Go and get your RP friend and punch him in his stupid fucking face for me.  Lancaster is nowhere fucking near and the Lancashire accent is totally different with many many unique features.  Seriously, right in his face.  PUNCH.

Then kick him in the balls and scream 'That's for Ironwood you Pretentious and ignorant little fuck'.

Also, Muppet isn't Scottish AT ALL.  FUCKING TELL THAT ASSHOLE TO SHUT HIS FUCKING STUPID FACE BEFORE I COME OVER THEN AND GELDON HIM BY BREAKING ALL HIS FUCKING FINGERS.

Assholes.


Gimli definitely wasn't speaking scottish but it was closer to some bastardized version of scottish than it was to Lancastrian.  It's more like how they speak in Carlisle.  If you want Lancashire accents, watch Wallace and Gromit - Wallace speaks with a thick Lancashire accent in that.  Alternatively, watch either The Full Monty or Last of the Summer Wine which are both set in Yorkshire.  It's close enough to Lancastrian to the untrained ear so will do for your friends needs. 


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 07, 2008, 06:22:53 AM
I don't care what it was closer too, it's honestly like someone saying their character is from New York and talking like Slim Pickens.

It's Wrong and Bob's Friend needs punched.

To Sum Up :  Accent Wrong, Punch Needed.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Signe on January 07, 2008, 06:29:32 AM
There is a town in NJ named Cow Town and lots of the people sound like they're from Texas.  It's creepy.  I put that down as one of the many, Many, MANY weird New Jersey town that you drive through as fast as possible and don't stop for a cup of tea.

Ask Strazos.  There seem to be an awful lot of places in NJ that range from weird or creepy to horrifyingly scary. 


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Yegolev on January 07, 2008, 09:55:12 AM
What about Groundskeeper Willy?  He's authentic, right?


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: angry.bob on January 07, 2008, 10:08:20 AM
Hmmm, Gimli was a bad example for the accent I was trying to convey. It was way too mild, though I did think he was trying for some sort of watered down Scottish thing. Learn something new everyday. The accent he does is an unholy fusion of the slurriest aspects of Fat Bastard, Groundskeeper Willy, and the Scotsman from the old Bugs Bunny cartoon My Bunny lies over the Ocean. This is the same guy who gives another guy playing a Chinese character born in Hong Kong and educated in English boarding schools and graduated from Oxford shit for not talking and acting like Hop Sing. The accent just seemed really wrong for a guy who's supposed to be from Lancaster - or even anyplace in Scotland. That's just based on Local Hero, Doctor Who, and most of the characters in Trainspotting. I could be wrong though, which is why I asked.

Sadly, the RP involved is nothing nearly as pleasurable as imaginative butt sex, a guy at the local games shop dug out his 30 year old copy of Top Secret and talked us into a playing a campaign set in the 70's while we all wait for the next Warmachine[/] league season to start. I'd really forgotten how godawful the system is.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Rendakor on January 07, 2008, 11:12:12 AM
There is a town in NJ named Cow Town and lots of the people sound like they're from Texas.  It's creepy.  I put that down as one of the many, Many, MANY weird New Jersey town that you drive through as fast as possible and don't stop for a cup of tea.

Ask Strazos.  There seem to be an awful lot of places in NJ that range from weird or creepy to horrifyingly scary. 
I'm ashamed to say that I live less than 20 minutes from cowtown.  :cry2:

As an aside, it's not actually a town; its sort of a flea market and rodeo combo. However, a large portion of Salem County NJ is populated by these confused neoconfederates... Protip: In addition to NJ being a northern, blue state, the civil war ended over 9000 years ago. Move on, get a clue, grow up, etc.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: DraconianOne on January 08, 2008, 02:11:35 AM
This is the same guy who gives another guy playing a Chinese character born in Hong Kong and educated in English boarding schools and graduated from Oxford shit for not talking and acting like Hop Sing.

And because they've been to an English boarding school and graduated from Oxford then they should sound like...?


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ironwood on January 08, 2008, 02:23:15 AM
Kristen Miller.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: DraconianOne on January 08, 2008, 02:35:01 AM
I'm ashamed to say that I live less than 20 minutes from cowtown.  :cry2:

I live very close to a village hamlet called Cow Roast. 

There's no rodeo.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: angry.bob on January 08, 2008, 06:26:26 AM
And because they've been to an English boarding school and graduated from Oxford then they should sound like...?

...they normally do. Which is what he did, no cheesy accent of any kind. Regardless, I'd like to think that someone who grew up in England all the way from 6 through their 20's would not sound like Jackie Chan. Maybe Hugh Grant. He's dreamy except for the whole buttfucking streetwhores without a rubber thing.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Slayerik on January 08, 2008, 06:29:58 AM
I'm dorky enough to have played Top Secret SI back in the day, so I'll just shut up now.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Ookii on January 08, 2008, 07:48:23 AM
You know Gimli didn't have a Scottish accent because you could understand what the hell he was saying.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Yegolev on January 08, 2008, 08:04:37 AM
Aye, ye might, rabbit... ye might.


Title: Re: Dear UK citizens, enlighten me please...
Post by: Mrbloodworth on January 08, 2008, 12:11:27 PM
Bedtop RGP game?  I sense a new geek market.

Only if it's solo-friendly.  :rimshot:

+1!