Chris Roberts Back in your wallet - STAR CITIZEN

[Falconeer]

New ship up for sale! And this time it's an alien one! Woohoo! Also, you can't use it in the beta for now, and it's 150$ but who in their right mind wouldn't buy one right away?

https://robertsspaceindustries.com/store/440-xian-khartu-al

[Maledict]

At this stage I honestly don't understand what I'm seeing.

If this all ends up with people drinking poison from a punch bowl to go meet a comet I wouldn't be surprised. The entire thing just seems *insane* - pledge thousands of dollars for something that won't exist for 4 years, that's massively behind schedule already, and then spend more money to buy ships you can't play for a year!

[KallDrexx]

It's worse than that.  Even if the game fully materializes and is massively fun you are paying hundreds of dollars for ships they have maintained you can get free in game

[Hoax]

The tension that will create is going to be insane.

All of the cultists are going to be demanding that ships by harder to come by, more expensive to maintain, that not having founder insurance really punishes the "leechers" etc. its almost inevitable that some if not all ships will be made much much more expensive during the course of beta testing to placate the hardcore who are all already $300+ invested.

If and this is a huge if, there ever is an actual game finished.

[tmp]

New ship up for sale! And this time it's an alien one! Woohoo! Also, you can't use it in the beta for now, and it's 150$ but who in their right mind wouldn't buy one right away?

https://robertsspaceindustries.com/store/440-xian-khartu-al

Wait, why can't you use it? Did they advance their business model to selling just space ship concept art now, instead of 3d meshes?

[schild]

I'm getting to the point where I want to ban all Star Citizen talk from f13 and nuke threads containing it from orbit.

[Falconeer]

New ship up for sale! And this time it's an alien one! Woohoo! Also, you can't use it in the beta for now, and it's 150$ but who in their right mind wouldn't buy one right away?

https://robertsspaceindustries.com/store/440-xian-khartu-al

Wait, why can't you use it? Did they advance their business model to selling just space ship concept art now, instead of 3d meshes?

Because no matter what ships you pre-purchased, in the "Arena Commander" (all we cna test of Star Citizen at the moment) you can only use the two starting ones. All the other ones were ready for trailers and ads months ago, but not for testing yet.

[tmp]

That's too funny. I guess as long as they have working chat channels limiting the available activity to spinning the ship in the hangar brings them close enough to what you'll typically get from the other spaceship mmo jesus.

[satael]

I'm getting to the point where I want to ban all Star Citizen talk from f13 and nuke threads containing it from orbit.

That would be a shame since no matter how (awfully) it turns out it will be something truly unique 

[schild]

My issue is with Chris Roberts having his gospel spread, even accidentally. He's a villain of the highest order in gaming and should be treated as such.

[Falconeer]

He's a villain of the highest order in gaming and should be treated as such.

I agree completely, but he won't go away by not talking about it on f13. We are constantly exposing him for what he is, and that's why we need this one thread.

[KallDrexx]

His gospel is spreading but it's not f13 that's doing it.  I'm pretty sure he's distributing drugs or something cause the graphs on the website show them taking in $1.2million just last week, and this week is at about $800k.

I mean, do you understand how many businesses would kill to have that much revenue without having to actually release anything?

[Miasma]

Space alien bike in action!

Picture of a couple loving dude bros out for a spin (cockpit am i right):

I'm getting to the point where I want to ban all Star Citizen talk from f13 and nuke threads containing it from orbit.

How are people supposed to learn from others' mistakes without threads like this?  This is one of the best threads on the forum.  I'm always sure to look at all the picture threads, useless conversation and then this.  It's amazing.

Here, more rage inducing (remember that the day's total seems to be cut off around midnight gmt so Saturday's tally will be larger and I will post that too):

I guess I own one of these ships because I got drunk in November and thought it would be rare.  Mine has lifetime insurance!!!

[UnSub]

I'm getting to the point where I want to ban all Star Citizen talk from f13 and nuke threads containing it from orbit.

Really, I think it's best that all Star Citizen talk is concentrated in one thread titled: "Star Citizen: I Told You So".

[Jeff Kelly]

So Star Citizen is essentially a Ponzi scheme, right?

[Falconeer]

That has been explained, detailed and demonstrated about 38 pages of this thread ago.

[HaemishM]

Wait, is it just me, or does the cockpit of that ship up there look like the invention Mr. Garrison created on South Park because of how the airlines fuck you?

[Chimpy]

I thought that was a stab at the Segway?

[HaemishM]

I think it was, but the customers who used it also said "But at least it isn't the airlines."

[Sir T]

And they used that line twice in the episode afair

[Merusk]

I thought that was a stab at the Segway?

It's both. One thing South Park does well is layer the joke.

[tmp]

Wait, is it just me, or does the cockpit of that ship up there look like the invention Mr. Garrison created on South Park because of how the airlines fuck you?

Given the price (and the game overall) it seems apt.

[Falconeer]

47M reached.

The new stretch goals are exciting!


At 48M we'll get a new commercial!

48M stretch goal: Retaliator Commercial – It was a close race but The Retaliator pulled ahead. The Avenger was a close second. The symbol of the United Empire of Earth’s power is the next ship to receive a slick commercial. Aegis Dynamics is in dire need of good publicity since the end of the of the Messer era. We currently have the Cutlass and the Constellation commercials in production and now the Retaliator will be added to that list.​

And at 49M they will develop an alien bonsai plant for that you can purchase for your hangar!

49M stretch goal: Xi’An Space Plant – Similar to a bonsai tree, the Centennial Bloom is a very famous Xi’An plant indigenous to Eealus III that blossoms for one night every one hundred years. They sell the plants in sealed terrariums to traders. Ever since their introduction to the UEE, Humanity has been fascinated by these beautiful plants and the wait for them to bloom.

All praise Jesus Chris!

[Stormwaltz]

They have to be trolling at this point.

Don't they?

[rk47]

They have to be trolling at this point.

Don't they?

Speaking of stretch goals, last time around we put their future up to a vote. 54% of Citizens voted that we should continue to offer goals, and we’re going to honor that choice. As I said last time, every dollar supports Star Citizen’s persistent universe… but I’m not comfortable promising additional features with each million unless they’re truly additive.

You asked for dis. 

[Maledict]

After spending time over the last few days reading the entire thread, I think my favourite part was the "what type of scam is it?" section.

Is it a pyramid scheme? Nope, cause only Chris Roberts gets rich!

Is it a ponzi scheme? Nope, because in ponzi schemes *some* investors get their money back.

In the end it was decided that the best fit is the old "Sell the Brookyln bridge to gullible people scame".

I do love the classics!

[Falconeer]

I see it much more like the Osho bullshit. That's worth a lot more money.

(Osho, depicted with one of his 50 Rolls Royces)



I am waiting for him and his minions to begin poisoning the saldads of local politicians' who oppose to his empire's expansion any minute now.

[Paelos]

This could be the first time a crowd-funding thing hits a threshold that makes class-action lawyers get involved.

[Hutch]

47M reached.

47 what? 47 MILLION? DOLLARS?

If this game isn't Pack Raptor Pirate Ninja Laser Jesus, fuck the class action lawyers. Someone should call the police.

[Nebu]

47 what? 47 MILLION? DOLLARS?

If this game isn't Pack Raptor Pirate Ninja Laser Jesus, fuck the class action lawyers. Someone should call the police.

Considering the mediocre games that released with > $100M budgets, this thing just needs to be playable.  His biggest enemy is over-promising on features.   

[Typhon]

Given that the $49M goal is a model of a plant that doesn't even have to bloom until the game has been live for 100 years I think he's gotten control of the over-promising.

[Yegolev]

49M stretch goal: Xi’An Space Plant – Similar to a bonsai tree, the Centennial Bloom is a very famous Xi’An plant indigenous to Eealus III that blossoms for one night every one hundred years. They sell the plants in sealed terrariums to traders. Ever since their introduction to the UEE, Humanity has been fascinated by these beautiful plants and the wait for them to bloom.

I do love a good meta, and this one is deliciously awesome.  Brooklyn Bridge, indeed.

[Paelos]

He's definitely PT Barnum at this point. There's no doubts left.

[schild]

Fuck this guy.

[MisterNoisy]

Speaking of stretch goals, last time around we put their future up to a vote. 54% of Citizens voted that we should continue to offer goals, and we’re going to honor that choice. As I said last time, every dollar supports Star Citizen’s persistent universe… but I’m not comfortable promising additional features with each million unless they’re truly additive.

You asked for dis. 

Must be nice to just drop a nice big shit into a blog and get money for it.