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f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: Punch 'em in the dick 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
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Author Topic: Punch 'em in the dick  (Read 22209 times)
Nonentity
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2009 Demon's Souls Fantasy League Champion


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on: August 26, 2008, 10:15:11 AM
I didn't make this. But it is awesome.

http://music.metafilter.com/2380/Punch-Em-In-The-Dick-NSFW-lyrics

Lyrics:

Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Fuckers talk shit
I’ma punch ‘em in the dick
(Bow!)
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Motherfuckers talk shit
I’ma punch ‘em in the dick

Yo look at that chump
See the way that he struts
Don’t kick him in the rump
Go nuts on his nuts
Just pop a squat
Start lettin’ off the shots
Like knock knock knock
Just coldcocked his cock
Yo, to all the cock-knockers
Nut-crackers
Ball-breakers
Peter-beaters
Keep on boxing your baby makers
With a sock to the jock
Better make that a double
Just a couple of rounds of knuckles
Beneath the buckle and he’ll buckle
If you’re in trouble
Give him some urine trouble
Hand him his balls
And tell him better learn to juggle
Turn his pebbles into rubble
Make him wonder what might’ve been
Make it so the South will never rise again

Now every man claims to be the toughest and the meanest
Watch your crocks, because soon the losers will be your weenus
And the winners in all the gladiator arenas
Are always the ones that go straight for the penis

So punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
motherfucker talk shit
I’ma punch ‘em in the dick
(B’low!)
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
motherfucker talk shit
I’ma punch ‘em in the dick

Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
motherfucker talk shit
I’ma punch ‘em in the dick
(Bow!)
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
You motherfuckers talk shit
I’ma punch ‘em in the dick

I’ll give your willy a welt
Like you ain’t never felt
Soon as I’m knelt
I’ma pelt you below the belt
Like Bang!
Bust em’ in the wang
Like it ain’t no thang
Now you really can’t hang

But you ain’t gotta be a dude
Shit, I’ll dick-punch a chick
Because I don’t discriminate
When I punch em’ in the dick
Whether Suzie Homemaker or a floozy home-wrecker
I’ma deck’er in the pecker, mother-fecker

It could be your mama
Better be no drama
You could be the Dalai llama
I’ma still put it on ya
With a right, left, right, left
Yo dick punched
Then you say Goddam, my shit’s crunched
Scrotum? I damn near killed ‘em
I capped him in (?) the boner, man
Forget about children
You ain’t got enough kung-fu to bust some ninja shit
Fuck Sun-Tzu, you want to learn the Art of Won

Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Motherfuckers talk shit
Straight punch ‘em in the dick
(B’low!)
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
You motherfuckers talk shit
Straight punch ‘em in the dick

Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Motherfuckers talk shit
Straight punch ‘em in the dick
(B’ow!)
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
You motherfuckers talk shit
Punch ‘em in the dick

We
Got
A brand new dance
Called punch his ass right in the dick

We
Got
A brand new dance
Called punch his ass right in the dick

Any of you snotty kids be talkin’ shit
I’ma drop a fist on your naughty bits
I got punches a’plentiful
You bet your rear-end it’ll sting
When I start swingin’ on your genitals
Because then it’ll swell up all out of proportion
Lookin’ like an eggplant forced into your foreskin
Nevermind abortion
Forget vasectomy
I got your birth-control… B’low!
Nut-check, homey

I punched God in the dick
I punched Mary in the dick
I punched Jesus Christ in the dick
Yo, I punched Cheney in the dick
I punched Powell in his colon
I punched George in his Bush
I punched Condoleezza Rice in the diiiiiick

Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(What)
Motherfuckers talk shit
Straight punch ‘em in the dick
(B’low!)
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
You motherfuckers talk shit
What, I’ma punch ‘em in the dick
Blaaah!

Punch ‘em in the dick
(Ungh)
Punch ‘em in the dick
(Ungh)
Motherfuckers talk shit
Straight punch ‘em in the dick
Blaaah!

Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Punch ‘em in the diiiiick
Motherfuckers talk shit
Yo, punch ‘em in the dick

Gonna punch ‘em in the dick
Watch me punch ‘em in the dick
Love to punch ‘em in the dick
Born to punch ‘em in the dick
Forever punch ‘em in the dick
Sucker punch ‘em in the dick
Fruit punch ‘em in the dick
Hawaiian punch ‘em in the motherfuckin’ diiiick
But that Captain's salami tray was tight, yo. You plump for the roast pork loin, dogg?

[20:42:41] You are halted on the way to the netherworld by a dark spirit, demanding knowledge.
[20:42:41] The spirit touches you and you feel drained.
K9
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Reply #1 on: August 26, 2008, 10:21:03 AM
 ACK!
I love the smell of facepalm in the morning
Nebu
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Reply #2 on: August 26, 2008, 10:26:23 AM
Ah, epic poetry.
"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."

-  Mark Twain
Nonentity
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Posts: 2301

2009 Demon's Souls Fantasy League Champion


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Reply #3 on: August 26, 2008, 10:29:55 AM
Blatantly stole this from another forum.
But that Captain's salami tray was tight, yo. You plump for the roast pork loin, dogg?

[20:42:41] You are halted on the way to the netherworld by a dark spirit, demanding knowledge.
[20:42:41] The spirit touches you and you feel drained.
Evildrider
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Posts: 5521
Reply #4 on: August 26, 2008, 11:09:21 AM
Haha, that shit's  awesome, for real
schild
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Posts: 60345


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Reply #5 on: August 26, 2008, 11:26:21 AM
what?
Nonentity
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Posts: 2301

2009 Demon's Souls Fantasy League Champion


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Reply #6 on: August 26, 2008, 11:27:03 AM
 ACK!
But that Captain's salami tray was tight, yo. You plump for the roast pork loin, dogg?

[20:42:41] You are halted on the way to the netherworld by a dark spirit, demanding knowledge.
[20:42:41] The spirit touches you and you feel drained.
HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42632

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Reply #7 on: August 26, 2008, 11:31:57 AM
So that's how you spell B’low!
Haemish MacLennan
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Lantyssa
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Posts: 20848
Reply #8 on: August 26, 2008, 01:15:43 PM
WTF?

Did you start drinking early?
Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
Bunk
Contributor
Posts: 5828

Operating Thetan One
Reply #9 on: August 26, 2008, 01:45:12 PM
Is it required to Den a thread that starts out with a Den inducing tactic?
"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL
"I have retard strength." - Schild
MrHat
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Out of the frying pan, into the fire.
Reply #10 on: August 27, 2008, 06:25:28 AM
Quote from: Bunk on August 26, 2008, 01:45:12 PM
Is it required to Den a thread that starts out with a Den inducing tactic?

We'll have to wait for the LHC to come online before talking about wormholes.
Sky
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Posts: 32117

I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.
Reply #11 on: August 27, 2008, 08:45:54 AM
And punch flower-breathing dragons in the dick?
Phildo
Contributor
Posts: 5872
Reply #12 on: August 28, 2008, 02:57:59 PM
Wasn't this song on the Boondocks first and called "Stump Him In The Nuts"?


Edited to include poor quality youtube link.  Best I could find.
« Last Edit: August 28, 2008, 03:02:18 PM by Phildo »
Sky
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I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.
Reply #13 on: August 29, 2008, 06:53:15 AM
Striketh Yon Cad In The Nether Regions (1358)
Righ
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Teaching the world Google-fu one broken dream at a time.
Reply #14 on: August 29, 2008, 09:04:41 PM
Its not a patch on Smell Yo Dick.
The camera adds a thousand barrels. - Steven Colbert
Strazos
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Posts: 15542

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Reply #15 on: September 01, 2008, 06:08:04 PM
Nonentity...

WHY YOU DO THAT? ACK!
Fear the Backstab!
"Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion
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Nonentity
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Posts: 2301

2009 Demon's Souls Fantasy League Champion


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Reply #16 on: September 02, 2008, 09:04:58 AM
But that Captain's salami tray was tight, yo. You plump for the roast pork loin, dogg?

[20:42:41] You are halted on the way to the netherworld by a dark spirit, demanding knowledge.
[20:42:41] The spirit touches you and you feel drained.
juicykarkass
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Posts: 3
Reply #17 on: September 09, 2008, 11:50:07 PM
One guy on Metafilter transcribed my lyrics, and he made some mistakes. That same version of the lyrics keeps getting spread around to all these bulletins. It bugs me. You can go to myspace.com/juicykarkass to read the proper lyrics.. I have some other rap songs up there too, but none of them will tickle your funny bone like this one.

j
schild
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Posts: 60345


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Reply #18 on: September 09, 2008, 11:54:08 PM
Oh shit, you're the guy we have to punch in the dick for this?
Evildrider
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Posts: 5521
Reply #19 on: September 10, 2008, 12:00:13 AM
LMAO.. He found us!
juicykarkass
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Reply #20 on: September 10, 2008, 12:01:14 AM
Guilty as charged.
Sky
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Posts: 32117

I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.
Reply #21 on: September 10, 2008, 07:47:39 AM
So what are your feelings on DRM?
Yegolev
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2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST


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Reply #22 on: September 10, 2008, 08:12:31 AM
Why am I homeless?  Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
justdave
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Reply #23 on: September 10, 2008, 09:40:49 PM
Christ, he's in Portland! Shouldn't you be spinning some IDM, young man?
"They started to resist with a crust that was welded with human brain and willpower."
Mrbloodworth
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Reply #24 on: September 11, 2008, 07:48:10 AM
I'm going to make an all dick mix tape.
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SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.
Reply #25 on: September 14, 2008, 02:24:36 AM
Will you be adding a dick in a box?

I'd like a copy.
I am Super, I am a Pop Tart.
Phildo
Contributor
Posts: 5872
Reply #26 on: September 14, 2008, 09:22:21 AM
Don't forget Detachable Penis!
NiX
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Locomotive Pandamonium
Reply #27 on: September 14, 2008, 11:41:06 AM
Phildo let his secret slip.
juicykarkass
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Reply #28 on: January 19, 2009, 03:23:54 AM
DRM? IDM? A Jedi knows not these things.

Seriously though. I have no idea what that stuff stands for.
Evildrider
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Reply #29 on: January 19, 2009, 11:28:01 AM
Like.. Wow... did this guy really come back and bump a thread that was about his song?    swamp poop
Signe
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Muse.
Reply #30 on: January 19, 2009, 11:44:35 AM
You say  swamp poop and I say  awesome, for real.
My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Yegolev
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2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST


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Reply #31 on: January 19, 2009, 07:32:53 PM
Quote from: Evildrider on January 19, 2009, 11:28:01 AM
Like.. Wow... did this guy really come back and bump a thread that was about his song?    swamp poop

Hell, I would.
Why am I homeless?  Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
Righ
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Teaching the world Google-fu one broken dream at a time.
Reply #32 on: January 19, 2009, 08:14:23 PM
Quote from: Signe on January 19, 2009, 11:44:35 AM
You say  swamp poop and I say  awesome, for real.

 awesome, for real  awesome, for real
I don't know why you say  swamp poop I say  awesome, for real
The camera adds a thousand barrels. - Steven Colbert
Trippy
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Reply #33 on: January 19, 2009, 08:53:35 PM
The next evolution in thead-killing lyrics: smiley lyrics!
Nonentity
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Posts: 2301

2009 Demon's Souls Fantasy League Champion


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Reply #34 on: January 20, 2009, 07:25:34 AM
I remember this thread!

It's like a field trip... to history!
But that Captain's salami tray was tight, yo. You plump for the roast pork loin, dogg?

[20:42:41] You are halted on the way to the netherworld by a dark spirit, demanding knowledge.
[20:42:41] The spirit touches you and you feel drained.
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