MLB 2011

[JWIV]

Capping off our journey through the MLB predictions, we go now to the East:

THE AL EAST

Baltimore - You can't hit, your pitching staff is a greasefire, and you're tied for 5th most errors in the AL. Well at least you can't fall out of last place. In fact, you've finished dead last in the AL East for the last 3 seasons. Tampa Bay getting good didn't help you out much. Maybe you can climb out of last place this year? Well, when you're getting outscored by 41 runs, survey saaaaaaaays...no! Baltimore fans need to really REALLY hope there is an NFL season this year, because that's the only thing you're going to care about come August.

Baltimore is fucking killing me this year  simply because they can't get firing on all cylinders.  You'll have great starting pitching, but then a bullpen collapse or 0 run support.  Or, the bats will be on fire, but your starting pitching can't get out of the damn 4th inning.   

But, I'm just gonna put this here, because it was awesome to see last night.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3F8kQ1QHq7w

[WayAbvPar]

Can we give you Bedard back for AJ? 

[ghost]

Lenny Dykstra charged with grand theft auto and drug possession.  

He always struck me as super sketchy.  I guess this is it for him-  no ESPN job like his buddy Kruk.  

Former New York Mets and Philadelphia Phillies star Lenny Dykstra was charged Monday with grand theft auto and drug possession by prosecutors who claim he used phony information to lease a car from a Southern California dealership.

Dykstra, 48, was charged with 25 misdemeanor and felony counts of grand theft auto, attempted grand theft auto, identity theft and other crimes, said Jane Robison, a spokeswoman for the Los Angeles County district attorney's office. He faces up to 12 years in state prison if convicted.

Edit: 

This is what Lenny looks like today.




This is what Lenny looked like when playing for the Phillies



This is what Lenny looked like when he came up with the Mets.




This motherfucker was on some major roids when he played for Philadelphia, that is for sure.  And it's clearly made him fucking insane. 
 

[HaemishM]

Lenny always was just a wee bit off, whether from the roids or just being fucking crazy.

[Paelos]

Roids certainly won't make you LESS crazy.

[ghost]

I mean fuck, Lenny looks like some sort of depressed English banker in that first photo.  In the Phillies photo his neck was bigger than his head. 

[Sjofn]

Wow, he looks like a douchebag in that Phillies picture.

More proof that all Philadelphia teams are evil. 

[WayAbvPar]

Wow, he looks like a douchebag in that Phillies picture.

More proof that all Philadelphia teams are evil. 

He was always a douchebag. Always comforting to know that my douchebag radar is still well calibrated.

[ghost]

Lenny is the very definition of douchebag.  In fact, I think it was him that they invented the word for. 

[Paelos]

So, it's been a month and change, and I'm going to look back on some of my NL predictions so far:

NL West - I predicted Colorado, Giants, Dodgers, Padres, Dbacks.

For starters, the Rockies immediately went into a freefall, but they will rebound. They always do. The Dodgers are right there. The Giants moved up a slot b/c the Rockies suck right now. The big surprise of the first half is the Dbacks. WTF? I remain relatively sure they will fall back to earth, but their home record is impressive. The Padres are still just awful.

NL Central - I predicted Cards, Reds, Brewers, Cubs, Astros, Pirates

Brewers and Reds are reversed at the moment and the Pirates have been much better than I expected. The Astros and Cubs on the other hand have been much MUCH worse. My god. Rarely do you see two teams in the same division that have both been outscored by 60 runs before the allstar break. It doesn't matter though, because unless a comet hits Pujols, the Cards are a lock.

NL East - I predicted Atlanta, Philly, Florida, Nats, Mets

The Phillies are doing what I expected. However, I expected the Braves to actually hit the ball, and they aren't. At all. Uggla is goddamn terrible. Heyward is a pussy who is getting called out by Chipper. We won a game last night because we had 1 run on 2 hits, and our pitching staff tossed a shutout. They can't possibly not hit all season long. It's unpossible. As for the rest, it's pretty much shaking out like I thought. Nats will leap the Mets at the end because the Mets are getting thumped by everyone except the Braves, and the Braves can't beat them either.

[HaemishM]

Yeah, the Cubs are bad bad bad and getting worse because anyone who is doing well gets injured. We're playing like 4 or 5 rookies in the outfield on a rotating basis, just trying to find SOMEBODY to hit the goddamn ball. And the pitching has been woeful, something I didn't expect at all. Hell, even when we do pitch well, we snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Watched Sunday's game, we're up 2-1 in the 9th with Marmol on the mound after Zambrano pitches a gem, he walks a guy, gives up a double that ties it before retiring the last guy to go to extras. Next batter is Pujols in the 10th, HOME RUN. Fuck.

The Brewers are better than I expected, but I think you're right, the Cards will win the division and blow it in the playoffs. Their pitching hasn't been stellar.

[Sjofn]

We won a game last night because we had 1 run on 2 hits, and our pitching staff tossed a shutout. They can't possibly not hit all season long. It's unpossible.

You'd be surprised. 

[Paelos]

Yeah, the Cubs are bad bad bad and getting worse because anyone who is doing well gets injured. We're playing like 4 or 5 rookies in the outfield on a rotating basis, just trying to find SOMEBODY to hit the goddamn ball. And the pitching has been woeful, something I didn't expect at all. Hell, even when we do pitch well, we snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Watched Sunday's game, we're up 2-1 in the 9th with Marmol on the mound after Zambrano pitches a gem, he walks a guy, gives up a double that ties it before retiring the last guy to go to extras. Next batter is Pujols in the 10th, HOME RUN. Fuck.

The Brewers are better than I expected, but I think you're right, the Cards will win the division and blow it in the playoffs. Their pitching hasn't been stellar.

I watched the end of that game. Pujols hit one that the guys in the next state knew was gone from the moment he touched it.

[Paelos]

Joba's done. Poor Yankees.

[Paelos]

Braves entire outfield is on the DL, we could only score 7 runs total against the Marlins yet still miraculously swept them with amazing pitching, and today they put up 11 runs with a cobbled together lineup against the Astros.

Some days, it just pays to be lucky! 

[Sjofn]

Told you so. 

[Paelos]

Braves have started to HIT! 6 wins in a row now.

[Paelos]

For the Mariners fan out there. Your map of baseball realignment.

http://deadspin.com/5811743/our-simple-guide-to-mlb-realignment-or-sorry-seattle-youre-losing-another-team

[Ingmar]

With their new stadium? Not a chance in the world.

[Paelos]

Is there a more pathetic team out there than the Marlins right now? I contend, no.

[Ingmar]

Is there a more pathetic team out there than the Marlins right now? I contend, no.

[Teleku]

For the Mariners fan out there. Your map of baseball realignment.

http://deadspin.com/5811743/our-simple-guide-to-mlb-realignment-or-sorry-seattle-youre-losing-another-team

I don't get it.  What is that chart trying to show?

[Paelos]

The new proposed divisions.

Also at least the Astros are 2-8 in their last 10. The Marlins are 1-9.

[Ingmar]

Yeah but the Marlins will figure it out at some point and stop losing.

[Teleku]

So, instead of 3 divisions and 2 leagues, 6 divisions and 1 league?  

I haven't been paying attention to baseball politics much.  Is this some new trend?

[Azuredream]

No, they would move one team from the NL to the AL to even up the leagues (as it currently stands there are 14 in the AL and 16 in the NL), and interleague games would be played intermittently throughout the season. At least, if I remember correctly.

[Teleku]

That map has a hell of a lot more than just 1 team switching leagues.  All the new divisions on that map are a mish mash of teams from both leagues.

[Ingmar]

I am pretty sure that is just one dude's dumb plan, not what they are officially talking about.

[Teleku]

Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out what the dumb plan is though!  It has no explanation and its bugging me.  ahhhhh

[Azuredream]

I thought he was just making a joke about the Sonics moving to Oklahoma City.

[Sjofn]

Is there a more pathetic team out there than the Marlins right now? I contend, no.

Half of San Francisco put hexes on them for killing Buster Posey, you see.

[Paelos]

Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out what the dumb plan is though!  It has no explanation and its bugging me.  ahhhhh

MLB wants divisional realignment. The conventional thinking is that divisions should be even (15 in each league) and that they should be based on geographical proximity. The current divisions have teams spread out all over the place and make no sense.

[Ingmar]

I'd rather see them keep the divisions even than have year-round interleague play, unless they're ditching the DH. Expand the AL to 16 or something. There are plenty of markets without MLB teams that are larger than ones with current teams that do fine.

EDIT:

Since mine was the last post I'll just edit: the San Jose Giants (high A affiliate) are 49-17.  Going to have to catch a game soon.

[WayAbvPar]

Dustin Ackley (2nd pick behind Strasberg in 2009) finally up and should be in the lineup vs the Phillies tonight. Amazingly the Ms are missing Lee and Halladay, but still have to deal with Hamels. Really excited to see this kid play.

[Sjofn]

I listened to the end of the Pirates/Astros game last night, and the Pirates announcers were so adorable when the Pirates won because RAISE THE JOLLY ROGER (they totally said that!), THE PIRATES ARE TWO GAMES OVER .500!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then they said this is the best record the Pirates have had at this point in the season since fuckin' 1999, so it was um. More understandable. But so cute! They sounded like they had won the World Series AND the Superbowl!